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| stock painting, on restaurant wall, Lynchburg, VA |
we make love like Autumn---feVerish , to break
the chill, knowing all too soon it will be over but
not until all the leaves pool
around our bare ankles
breathless,
brilliant
in the moment before death
sap drains deep from the tree
into buckets, we pour in great cauldrons
distill to syrup, air full of hickory smoke
we dream
of waffles & pancakes,
butter ponds, a slight tension as the fork
cuts the surface into---a V
of ducks flyies south across flushed skies
us naked & hungry
a mouthful,
a mouthful
trees shake, shudder
while the wind keens
& animals store up for the winter.
Over at dVerse Poets, Mary is welcoming in the next season with our prompt today for Poetics. It goes live at 3pm EST. See you there.
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104 comments:
No#1?
Hank
Love this poem, Brian. I think you metaphorically outdid yourself here as you captured the feeling of autumn and then distiller it into a feverish, passionate love poem. A worthy tribute to the season and to your love.
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The opening line down to the last line is filled with lushness of autumn, smoking enough to make me hungry for breakfast ~
Sent us reeling from the impact of Autumn's goodness and the strength of love! Nicely Brian!
Hank
Gads! but I suddenly desire a walk in the Autumnal woods.............
You rock words!
Anybody ever tell you that?
;)
what i love most here is the immense intensity...the passionate desire to hold the moment, cherishing every single second, bite and kiss and scent and taste.. so many senses touched here...and i really want some pancakes now or--or-- smiles
Bare ankles... autum and pancakes ... Love the feel of this :)
Oh geesh you've awaken all my appetites, don't do that I'm cutting down on everything, shame on you making it so darned irrestible I want pancakes and MY lost cat now
Feels like Autumn to me. Thanks for stopping by my place.
Ahhh. One of my favorites of yours actually. So sweet and sensual and homey all at once- the jumps from physical moment to metaphor and the dreams of pancakes and butter lakes and of course, all has this strong physical intimate feel, but also the fanciful feel of visions in head (not just on skin). Really lovely. k.
Not ready for autumn man. Summer sprinted past me and I missed it.
wonderful imagery and sensory evocation. very sexy Brian. xo
leaves around bare ankles - my favorite part :-)
Yikes now I'm hungry for...everything!
(blush) Autumn will never be the same for me... :-)
Ah! You had me at the first line and then again at the Maple syrup making and the dream of pancakes, the very V-cut of the fork taking me to my favorite Fall sign: the geese flying to visit the south. And best of all, though each is a minute only, it is a minute that leads to the next year and not to death. All of my reading puts death in autumn, but you call it right: This is a harvest, a storing up for a winter rest before the great geese return again. Thank you.
Good write Brian but you don't mind if i bring my own syrup to the table do you? {;-[I}}}}
what a delicious way to welcome autumn and "break the chill"
Autumn is coming
Quite the beat your strumming
As all are aware
And proceed to prepare
Then some lovey dovey delight
Is surely in sight
So fabulously written - so sensual and lovely.
Beautifully expressed...the words flow just as easily and the syrup. Love the pairings of love and food.
Wonderful
Hugs
SueAnn
very nice..reminds me of a poem I wrote about autumn dropping her dress
Man, this poems evokes so many feelings and uses all the senses!
Hello my good friend Brian, I had been hot cold, flip flop with my blogging, like a drama queen :) I am taking in my blog private to take a real break. A break, not a break up :) I appreciate and shall miss your friendship and hope to see you again soon.
nice...um, yeah, stanza 3....let's just say I am now craving waffles and pancakes (smiles)
So much meaning pulled from a simple image overlooking your breakfast!
Gorgeous poem...really love this :)
Mmm... sound delicious.
Brian...some gorgeous lines laced through this one...trying to figure the prompt...I've got a huge date with a tattoo chair this afternoon and am bound to be late to the party...oh..might be my cheeks are reaching the shade of autumn red I love so much ;)
Very nice, very nice indeed.
I love this one. Tons of symbolism mixed with the season. The first stanza sighs into the second which crescendos. I'm craving breakfast!
Now I can't decide if I want breakfast or sex! What a dilemma. I suppose I should have both!
Wow! Now I am longing for Autumn...:-)
Holy cow. There's autumn and then there's Autumn, both of which are present here (but you are not in autumn, sir; those leaves are not yet falling). And love, its power, beauty and many colors. Yes. Thank you.
Eagerly awaiting 3 pm!
Seems like everyone is looking toward Fall. I'm looking at green leaves and grass and am so totally not ready for that to change.
we make love like Autumn
well, who could resist reading a poem or anything that begins this way?!
i won't comment on the maple syrup, but i will say your metaphors are sappily evocative :^)
it's obvious how much you love to write, brian. i'm happy among kindred souls. thank you..
love
kj
I love that you were able to write it. And make it.
Autumn and romance go nicely together ... as well as being beautiful.
... my dress isnever ever on the floor ... but my jeans are at times ... if that's counts for anything ... nice ... I hear you loud and clear ... Be well, my awesome friend ... Love, cat.
Fabulous, evocative, provocative imagery - I love it!
Brian--gorgeous imagery--love the sap/syrup thing...sensual and alive, this piece.
Oooo, the smell of hickory and hot soup. you took my sense there. awesome
'sap drains deep from the tree
into buckets, we pour in great cauldrons
distill to syrup' - wow, loved this!this piece just breathes with autumn and the fever of love.
This was full of layered depth and restrained intensity. Loved it though I kind of felt like I should look away at times :) Beautiful piece filled with body and life.
Ahh... sensual, rich in imagery and warmth.
Beautiful!
Such lush words from the first line to the very last! Wonderful poem. I especially love the keening wind.
I guess that's the reason Autumn is my favourite season ;-)
Beautiful...we make love like autumn....leaves pooling at bare ankles...lovely! Really autumn is my favourite season
Great images brother, can feel the Autumn days embrace you, as does a loved one.
"around our bare ankles breathless"
Enjoyed that.
Accidental or not, I liked the V of the ducks' flight right after I imagined the V-cut in a tree for syrup.
Awesome piece. Passionate and aptly described. Love your third stanza especially.
Lush & lusty ~ wow
... what is there to add..all have touched on my thoughts, except I guess I hope there is no poison oak among the leaves (my own personal experience once, but it was spring) I'm sure I have not read your poems of spring, summer and winter love..I look forward to it!!
I'm sure I've read somewhere that there's evidence to suggest that death or near-death causes the living to want to have sex as an instinctive act to proove life... And also to keep warm I imagine! ;)
Now I know why Autumn is my favorite season!
;)
Ohhh!
Perhaps the return of winter around the corner gets us to appreciate the comforts of home, the comforts of another warm body.
Provocative and enticing. Paints autumn a new shade :)
Very flowing and seductive view!
I read this this morning and swore I commented--o well. I will be the 58th person saying this is gorgeous writing--sensual, and please--the pancakes are way more tempting than they have any right to be.
OH, that was very nice...no wonder I love autumn. haha.
Whew, I like the way these animals store up. ;)
Gorgeous:
"not until all the leaves pool
around our bare ankles
breathless"
I love the connection between your birds in a V and the uppercase V in "feVerish," referring to another sort of V, if you ask me.
This is wonderful, Brian. I love it all.
This is exactly what Autumn feels like after a long, dry summer.
Sensual and wonderful poem.
def a favorite! so loved this, warm, sensual and buttery!!
Autumn has identity and passion thus a physical form, again Brian you amaze
Awesome imagery here Brian, metaphor and symbols of Fall used perfectly here, really offering a sensual side to the season, that, at least I for one, never truly considered, which I find amazing when another idea or thought stirs what you've always thought of about something. great write. Thanks
Doing autumn Brian-style! Love the V and how in inVades the poem - two as one, trees & breakfast & love & geese flying..a chevron of changes!
Brian, made me hungry for breakfast, love and the coziness of autumn's beautiful richness. Thanks, awesome as usual.
Wow, you make it sound like a Bacchanalian party - and I thought I enjoyed autumn!
i don't usually see autumn as sensual ~ nice job, Bri!
Brilliant word play as always!
♥
A wonderful poem that works intensely on two levels.Nicely done :)
Very sensual, tickling all the appetites. Autumn has that wat about it.
Fear not, my man! The sap will rise again. (sorry. I couldn't resist!)
Great poem, Brian.
I just love the first stanza Brian - evocative and beautiful
Just love the first stanza Brian - evocative of the season and love - beautiful
Yes and you clearly see the wood through the trees...is it me or is it hot in here
really really like the opening verse. great intensity and unique take on autumn :-)
everything in nature mimics something else in nature. this is a fine piece.
Fall is coming and it will be time for snuggling under the covers. Can't wait for cooler weather here.
omg I LOVE this one.
love
love
love
but james atel......
um..
From life and love (making love)- to death (the bleeding of the trees)- to the hickory smoke and pancakes- (comfort- and the comfort autumn can bring)....to the perpetration for winter....for me, you've captured life and change- so symbolised by this time of year....great poem
Sigh. Big sigh. Just delicious. I love autumn, and you know I'm a big fan of your metaphors. This is my new favorite.
Tina @ Life is Good
That sounds like the best pancake feast ever!
Lovely Brian - so evocative of the season. I especially loved the lines about preparing maple syrup - not something we do here.
The title of this alone "her dress on the floor" is enough to have my imagination going everywhere. True beauty Brian, once again, true beauty.
Now I know why autumn is my favorite time of year. :) Beautifully descriptive, Brian.
You have given me a glimpse of a world that is unfamiliar to me. Your "painting" of it is so vivid, I now have a picture in my head.
Read this yesterday.
Is it my imagination or can your poetry actually improve with each write?
I loved this. It's def not your typical autumn poem. It's mixed with passion, love, even death and leaves one with a feeling of appreciation for being alive in autumn.
Lovely share as always. Easy to read, good metaphor and interesting double entendre S3 whether purposeful or not! But being a New Englander (home to maple syrup) am a bit confused with reference to syrup for Fall--that is usually a Spring event when all comes to life again. Sorry, probably more use of metaphor and a little poetic license, but you lost me on that one!!
This is "delicious" on so many layers. Yes, there is an urgency in autumn.
Food, sex and fall... Now that's a wicked little combination right there *wry smiles* Intense, intimate and delicious Brian.
Loved your poem, what a gift you have. Thank you for coming by and leaving a comment on my blog.
Such a great metaphor and perfect images!
this for me is such a fertile autumn, wow, and so sensuous! -
"leaves pool
around our bare ankles
breathless"
and really liked the sound and sight of :
"a V
of ducks flyies south across flushed skies
us naked & hungry"
this is a vibrant fall, full of life and color -
nice nice brian ;-)
very cool Brian, tying in of the disparate images, yet somehow related
So love the feel of this autumn love!
Autumn for you
The tropics for me
Winter for some
Spring for the young
and nothing for the nun
Oh my! Love this Brain...Fall Love ❤◠❥ I want to go for a walk amongst those ankle deep leaves.
breathless indeed!
Wonderful use of metaphor. Beautifully done.
ooooohhhh ~ love, food and autumn. My love, you know just perfectly how to bundle all my favorites into one! Haven't quite found the right words yet to explain how much I love this one, but I DO!!
delicious... now i know why autumn is my favorite season. *smiles*
I usually fail to appreciate fall due to the loss of Summer. I miss summer :(
Nice images in the poem!
Two humans passing on the
USS Wal-Mart...
Two humans passing on the
USS Wal-Mart...
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