Wednesday, September 26, 2012

denying Autumn, i fall further Every day

tonight on the way home, Forest, VA

feathered wing, flock of seagulls, sand grain
on your big toe knuckle,

each 
salty
breath,

tip of the tongue, taste,
grilled jerk chicken, coconut lotion
wet, golden sun skin

& waves & waves & waves

hard edge bottle mouth, parting lips,
perspiring circles on the wood face,
encyclia opening
damp

from after-
noon rain

(blurred line between)

hard sidewalk, grass brittle, sky pinked, sun fade
wind blows, a leaf leaves---as leaves do,
impales itself on a branch 

& you & you & you

written for Poetry Jam - which was a lot harder than I originally thought, to write art for arts sake-which ended up feeling rather imagist.

66 comments:

Gloria said...

Lovely. Have a nice day Brian!

Gloria said...

And Im first lol

Mary said...

I enjoyed this, Brian, as it seemed a bit of a different style than your usual. I agree that it is 'imagist.' You shared MANY images, and I enjoyed 'connecting the dots' to make meaning. My favorite lines were the last four! Picturing a leaf impaling itself....and loved '& you & you & you.' I think I have to work on being more 'imagist.' I am most often concrete. LOL.

the walking man said...

Surreal word combinations to paint the picture, connected all in all with the title. Jamaica!

lifeisaroadtrip said...

That last line is classic BM. As always, you write a lovely picture and paint a beautiful story.

Daniel said...

It looks like a UFO is apparent in the UR corner of your photo. That adds to the plot somewhat, don't you think? (smiles)

Anne said...

You usually write from the personal and it ends up being art anyway. I do like that line about the leaf impaling itself though. I can both see and feel what your saying here.

my heart's love songs said...

this has lots of the flavors of Brian, though in a gentler mood ~ LOVE IT!

"a leaf leaves---as leaves do."

and your title is really cool! {smile}

and that view is gorgeous!!!

thank you so much for joining in at Poetry Jam, Bri!


dani

Brian Miller said...

the title and the last line are my fav parts because i think that is where the heart is in this one....without it the rest are just swirling snippets of images...oh well, it was interesting to try...lol...

DJan said...

It was fun to read, too, Brian. I read it several times, inhaling... :-)

Pat Hatt said...

I bit different than your usual take
But the images you did awake
And you and you and you
Was sure the best ending to come due
Adds it all into one
With the images you spun

Crystal Jigsaw said...

You gave me a lovely imagine of a sunkissed beach with this poem, Brian.

CJ x

manicddaily said...

It is different from the norm as I don't think of you as an art for art's sake kind of guy, but still has your sweetness. Maybe I'll try but very tired and quite busy today, so hard to say. Yours is fun though. k.

humbird said...

'denying Autumn, I fall further Every day' - nice title. Very inspiring, Brian! Your poem reminds to stay present, enjoy uniquness of each moment, every day...Thanks

Daydreamertoo said...

Yes, this is totally different from your usual. I liked it, a lot!

Claudia said...

smiles...very imagist indeed..love the image snippets as each seems to carry a story in its own...also like the blurred line in between..def. a painting that makes one stand for a while, look at it and feel the painter's heart..smiles

JStar said...

I AM holding on as well! Beautiful write Brian!

Shadow said...

this is like rings floating in the air...

SaraV said...

Brian, so many great lines in this--your title made me laugh out loud--Love those plays on words :-) Perfect goodbye to those salty days. Really loved this.

Valerie said...

They may be swirling images but they were good.

I've yet to discover what jerk chicken is...must peruse Google.

Geraldine said...

Ahhh...very nice. As far as Autumn is concerned though, I say: BRING IT ON!!!

Always a pleasure to stop in. :<)

Okie said...

lovely

hedgewitch said...

Beautiful brian. The photo, whih looks as if the world has melted, and the words, that seem to show a similar melt and drift of emotions--just beautiful.

Zouxzoux said...

Very sensual - I love it.

Susan said...

It's like your eye scans and then comes back to rest in your desire and then scans again in an endless cycle--and I love it as much as I love punctuation--especially dashes and ellipses . . .
falling
waves and . . .
of you . . .

Very nice way to live.

turtlememoir said...

very beautiful, brian, & immediate. individual images held up for me to see until i saw something of a whole picture... loved the last line (esp after the previous 'leaving' ones) - it had the feeling of a homecoming

Heaven said...

The title is very eye-catching ~

Nice brushstrokes of the scenes, but I agree,the ending is lovely ~

Myrna R. said...

I like. Even when you venture out to unfamiliar territory, you master the journey. Art for art's sake - that's a good reason to write.

Laurie Kolp said...

A most beautiful capture... and sensuous!

Tara Miller said...

I thought this was pretty. It has a calming sense as it's being read.

Mama Zen said...

This is so lovely!

Magpie said...

Had to smile at Tracy's comment...do you want to be considered "classic BM"? :) Lovely as always. I can see the condensation clearly.

happygirl said...

It feels like you're trying to hold on to summer. But, you can't.

ayala said...

A sense of serenity, lovely snippets . :)

^.^ said...

I'm intimidated by this one ... again ... of course ... but will not stop commenting until I am, B ... Fall is always either or in my part of the country ... 5 months of winter is coming ... Life is too short to embrace 5 months of whiteness, hmmm?

Alice Audrey said...

Art for art sake poetry on purpose? I don't think I could do it. As to imagist, yes, but you always are. Usually more so than this. It's one of the things I like about your poetry.

Dolly@Soulstops said...

not sure why, but that image of the "sand grain on your big toe knuckle" and of a leaf impaling itself on a branch... like the tension between the two seasons...blessings, Brian :)

Pat said...

beautiful...in a daydreamy kind of way

California Girl said...

I don't know how you do this each day. Poetry is hard, good poetry even more so. I have poetry written years ago I think is good but it took a long time to polish it. Your dedication has given you the experience to write in many different styles which is impressive.

Dulce said...

you did again... round the bush you drove me but i kinda of get it...

Fall here never comes, so the beach is not a dream rather a nightmare...

Emily Sovich said...

I found myself reading this over and over. I love the way the images swirl round, and that last heady gasp of summer.

Ella said...

so romantic! A lovely escape built with fond memories n' magic!
Loved all that you shared~

Helen said...

I'm still struggling with the prompt ... you are so right, it's a lot harder than it seems at first glance!

Love, love what you did with it ...

Alex said...

I guess that the season change makes some mood changes too ;)

adan said...

arty with images, has a great feel

my fav line :

"a leaf leaves---as leaves do"

lori mcclure said...

This one is quite different, but it has a stream of consciousness feel. The last line is my favorite. The repetition is sweet :)

Cloudia said...

pass the acid




Aloha from Honolulu,

Comfort Spiral
=^..^=

> < } } ( ° >

Pastor Sharon said...

Sun fades ....wind blows and I find myself wrapped up with a blanket, feeling like I just read a Bob Dylan poem.

You rock this one!

Betsy Brock said...

sounds like a lovely day!

Peggy said...

Very imagist indeed Brian and yes, art for art's sake--I think though perhaps there is some message there too?

farmlady said...

Deny the change as long as you can... it will come anyway.
Everything always does.
And so it goes... for you, and you and you.

Fred Rutherford said...

very cool, love the visuals here, really a great job of painting the scene here.

ladyfi said...

So beautifully poetic!

Maggie May said...

Yes....... is that a UFO in the right hand side of the photo?
Maggie X

Nuts in May

Lydia said...

I absolutely love this poem. Wow oh wow, Brian.

Dave King said...

I agree! I, too, found it a lot harder than I expected!

Dave King said...

Sorry, I'm having a real mare of a morning. I shall now go and lie down! I should have gone on to say that the clipped style of your poem was exactly right, had me spellbound from the first word.

Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell said...

I liked the images it evoked in my mind as I read.

CiCi said...

Amazing that with words you entice your readers to bring into mind images they can relate to while at the same time attempting to visualize what it is in your own mind when you write.

Lorraine said...

I love Autumn...when I die I want that glorious Autumn branch to pierce my heart

Who Is Afraid Of Miss Lovett? No, Mrs.Lovett... said...

"hard sidewalk, grass brittle, sky pinked, sun fade
wind blows, a leaf leaves---as leaves do,
impales itself on a branch..."


Hi! Brian...
The poetic words OF
"denying Autumn, i fall further Every day" do compliment your image and you did [very] well, as you, wrote art for art sake...Tks, for sharing...too!

deedee :)

laurie said...

beautiful, I just enjoyed this so much,

Goofball said...

gorgeous picture

Syd said...

I am in autumn I guess. But I don't want winter to come.

Mary Mansfield said...

Lots of vivid images in this, together they paint quite the picture. And jerk chicken, omg, just the thought makes my mouth water. Nice one, Brian!

Sabio Lantz said...

Indeed, it is imagist. Nice trip to the beach