Sunday, March 11, 2012

Magpie Tales: Lollipop Kids

Image by Uzengia Aleksander Nedic (via Magpie Tales)
It is awakening naked in the hedgerow, thicket and brambles realizing your comfort in the cradle the branches have created around your bones, even as they grate together. The thorns piercing flesh to places untouched and feed on your lifeblood. No sun.

Hearing your name, the one no one knows & even you have forgotten over time for disuse, sweetness on your ear and at the same time knowing how much it will hurt to crawl out. Crying out and only your echo returns. Chipped finger nails etching lines on your legs as you pull away, making you feel wanted, whispering promises of pleasure in your ear as it strokes your sex.

This is what you will miss, it tempts. Don't you remember why you came to us, it chides. It will happen again and what will you do without us? Then guilt. Then anger. Then laughter as you lay just out of their reach in a pool of yourself, struggling to draw a ragged breath. The ache as it enters your body. Look at you, you will be back, on your knees soon enough, but I will not wait for you, it sneers.

Shivering and alone. Blind thick black, the light so bright & shadows reaching. Fear they might be no different, even as they welcome you home. Home, a foreign word in your mouth, much less your heart. But---

Her eyes are the spaces between words, the distance of stars as she looks out the window. Tight skirt and torn fishnet, blue bruise purple, hair a mess, leaving lipstick on the end of cigarettes, one after another after another. Ash rains from the next shaking tip as she rubs her face. Catching my gaze she smiles lopsided, like a circus clown, the ones you know are only make up, quick then breaks, stubs and slips shades in place to cut the suns brightness.

She totters a bit as she crosses the parking lot, to a car with Kansas plates. Her ruby heels click, click, click-ing in her wake.

Image by SueAnn

this is a Magpie Tale. I had already started this based on the picture by SueAnn, a blogfriend that is an incredible artist as well..

94 comments:

Sue said...

Heartbreaking.

Tess Kincaid said...

I love the name in the ear...how much it will hurt to crawl out...beautiful...

kez said...

so sad but a beautiful write thank you x

DCW said...

"Her eyes are the spaces between words" . . . I like that

Kathe W. said...

wonderful writing but oh so tragic

Kay said...

wow...'her eyes are the spaces between words'...your piece is tragically beautiful...

rel said...

It may only be a blink of the eye, but I'm content to wait a while longer before answering the call to return ome.
Nice images Brian.
rel

Grace Curtis said...

Lovely words!

DJan said...

You often leave me moved enough to want to make a comment, and this one is one of those, with nothing to say that has meaning, other than... powerful.

hedgewitch said...

Strong, bri--very vivid images of that lost land of self ('...just out of their reach in a pool of yourself,...')--abuse, addiction, self-loathing, whatever is smudging the beauty of the character at the end into a phantom hiding in the thorns--fine prose poetry that brings a chill.

Claudia said...

ugh...this made me shiver..feeding on her lifeblood, the considering to stay even if it hurts because at least there's this feeling to be wanted..the listening to all the lies because at least there's something that feels like home...it's so hard to get out there...and the inner bonds are much more powerful than those that can be seen..powerful stuff bri

Laurel's Quill said...

dark...and sad. But beuatifully tragic.

Helen said...

You brought her to life ... hard stuff, so worth the read!!

annell said...

Strong and dark!

Anne said...

When you do something this good, I have a hard time coming up with words that won't tarnish what I've just read. You have quite the knack with the sensual Brian. And against the dark background, it smolders.

Linda said...

I enjoyed the crumb of hope you left at the end, when she clicked her ruby shoes to get herself back to Kansas. I hope her aunt was waiting there with a hot bath. In her eyes and the spaces between the words of this sad tale, I know there is no nurturing aunt for this lollipop kid. Thanks for sharing, Brian. She could become a character in the novel you should write.

JJ Roa Rodriguez said...

Your stories are always nice to read.

JJRod'z

Have a wondful week ahead Sir Brian. Btw, thanks for the notice about the error on my link...

Tabor said...

This is so evocative. Good job!

manicddaily said...

Toto, I don't think we are in Kansas anymore!

Sorry--chilling. I did have a feel of a house having fallen in on some one. Perhaps that is life. K>

RD said...

"like a circus clown, the ones you know are only make up"

a well told tale

Peace ☮

Leovi said...

Impressive words, truly overflowing. Greetings.

Heaven said...

A beautiful albeit dark write Brian.
I can see her clearly as she shivers and walk back to the parking lot.

Thanks for all the support you gave me in my other blog. I won an award ~

Happy Sunday ~

otin said...

I need an email explanation. I can't figure it out. You know me...abstract is not my forte. lol

Daniel said...

Somehow the pics really suited this one. I think I understood the piece, but could not figure out the title.

Brigid said...

Gripping piece, Brian.
-Her eyes are the spaces between words- now that's a great line.

emily wierenga said...

click, click, clicking their way into my heart...

Daydreamertoo said...

The sad thing is, there are so very many too.... just like her.

Tara Miller said...

You words leave us feeling her emptiness and deep sadness / desire to be wanted, accepted, loved. Very good write my love. You always bring us into your stories so well.

SueAnn said...

I feel the despair and emptiness tearing at my heart!! Wonderful piece and you so changed how I looked at my piece.
Thanks
Hugs
SueAnn

Luke Prater said...

very evocative Brian... you get to the emotions adroitly

flaubert said...

My goodness! Brian, there is so much to like about this, but my favourite part is:
"Then laughter as you lay just out of their reach in a pool of yourself, struggling to draw a ragged breath."

Awesome writing.

Pamela

christopher said...

Very well crafted, my friend. And thanks for befriending Wander too.

Coloring Outside the Lines said...

I just had to read this out loud. Strong images left behind.

Bonnie said...

Hope the clicks take her to a better place. Well done Brian!

turtlememoir said...

fantastic writing, Brian - especially

Her eyes are the spaces between words, the distance of stars as she looks out the window.

!

Fred Rutherford said...

Sad for sure, but nonetheless a good read. I love the little details you include like the mentioning of the kansas plates, fits perfectly and is something that could have been overlooked, yet by choosing to add it you add a whole other level to the piece. But things like this, I think you always do a great job with detailing, this is but one example- great job. thanks

izzy said...

Memories like that are hard to have;
but living on -with the click click click- can sometimes trick you into thinking you can get away. Thanks.

Kutamun said...

Gday mate, it is amazimg how love can appear in even the most "unconventional" romantic liasons. Bloody fantastic!

Mama Zen said...

This hits hard and true, Brian.

Wander said...

Good pros Brian...I liked this "laying in a pool of herself"
Good line!

I'll have mine up later this evening...

Wander

Baur said...

Loved this!

ayala said...

Powerful and sad. Good write, Brian.

Karen said...

Superb Brian!

Nikki Rules said...

"She totters a bit as she crosses the parking lot, to a car with Kansas plates." I don't know why, but the fact the plates are from Kansas made me chuckle. How very appropriate for reasons I could never put words to.

TALON said...

So so sad, Brian, but beautifully crafted.

Magpie said...

This has layers upon layers...love the ruby red heels. :)

Christine said...

I was right in there with them, watching and listening.. well done!

janaki nagaraj said...

sad...

Dave King said...

Some inspired phrases here which had an almost spell binding effect on me.

Then laughter as you lay just out of their reach in a pool of yourself,

for instance, and her eyes being the spaces between words. Magical.

Valerie said...

Extremely deep, but it does have rhythm.

mo.stoneskin said...

Unbelievably good. One of my favourites of yours yet.

Absolutely loved:

"Her eyes are the spaces between words"

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

so sad or, maybe the trip continues on and becomes more...catching someones eye, really catching someones eye, well it allows them to know they are not invisible.

darsden said...

:-)

Laurie Kolp said...

Poignant piece, Brian. This is beautiful:

Her eyes are the spaces between words, the distance of stars as she looks out the window.

adeeyoyo said...

Clowns always make me think that they are sad, lonely people underneath the paint... Lovely piece, Brian!

Lyn said...

"In a pool of yourself"...the starting point, the end...great insight into multi-leveled lives...

Kulio said...

ooh, love the ending

The Bug said...

Another story that makes me think...

Pearl said...

Wow. So dark and beautiful. This is a piece of art...

Pearl

Jannie Funster said...

I think I saw a girl like that once in the bus station in Calgary. So sad, her definition of home.

Interesting title for this too. Not what I expected within.

xo

Joseph Pulikotil said...

Hello Brian,

Masterful use of words to create visual pictures.You are a specialist with words. Amazing post with lovely pictures.

Have a wonderful day,
Joseph

lifeisaroadtrip said...

Lots of really good lines in this one, Brian.

Sandi McBride said...

This is startling in it's entirety, from conception to birth...and heart breaking...I feel as an eyewitness to a crime
Sandi

Jackie Jordan said...

Dammit, Man! It hurts just to read this. If misery loves company, I'm staying clear of this one ...

Glenn Buttkus said...

On the bottom of the six dozen
I come to genuflect to a master,
for this is one of your strongest
pieces, with all the strength,
pain, and soul that you could
muster, a whole novella between
the lines, a paean to all battered
women, to the women of the world
who are still chattels, furniture,
playthings; wow.

hyperCRYPTICal said...

Dark, sad excellent write.

Anna :o]

Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell said...

This makes me feel pretty sad. :(

Wayne Pitchko said...

somewhat sad Bri.....but certainly a nice read...thanks for this

Carrie Burtt said...

A captivating and amazing write Brian......so many ways we loose our way home...a sad story for sure.

Chantel said...

You made me shiver with this one. Such torment...

Kaylen said...

This slightly hurt my heart, but I'm not sure why. It was sweet...touching.
Your words are magic!!!

Josh Hoyt said...

Very sad at what happens to so many. I think of them as children and the dreams they once had that have ll now gone by the wayside.

Jim Swindle said...

Powerful writing, my friend. I hope she gets out of the pool of herself, and out of the clutches of what's grabbing for her, and into the safety and the love that God gives. That pool of self is way too deep, and the clutching of the past is way too strong, for her to face alone.

SUCEN said...

Cool

kaykuala said...

Somewhat testing and sad. Had to put through with a lot. At least there's hope at the end

Hank

Dolly@ Soul Stops said...

oh how these lines "She totters a bit as she crosses the parking lot, to a car with Kansas plates. Her ruby heels click, click, click-ing in her wake."...break my heart...praying for her and all those lost girls...how are you, Brian?

Brian Miller said...

hi dolly...i am good...long day for sure today...but a good one...

Joanna Jenkins said...

Wow, Brian. That was beautifully tragic.
jj

LadyFi said...

Oh, so very moving and sad. Beautifully written.

sharmishtha said...

it was scary.

The Empress said...

this makes me want to help all those women.

Shake them by the shoulders and give them what they need. If only I could inject it into them, or concoct a potion, or..I don't know.

So very heartbreakingly sad.

ninotaziz said...

This is how I love you best. Lovely lovely prose.

Sad...but still lovely, Brian.

After all, the most beautiful stories are often tragedies.

Tumblewords: said...

Strong piece with the ability to reach deep and leave a memory entrenched.

Okie said...

creepy cool and emotionally stirring. I really liked this.

thanks. :)

Goofball said...

she's so lonely I think, but she doesn't even realise how much.

Mystic_Mom said...

Brian, buddy, you have a real talent for drawing me into the tale and then leaving me wondering, "What happened next?" Love it!

Lolamouse said...

Powerful stuff Brian!

Secret Agent Woman said...

Oh, that one is sad.

Reena Walkling said...

Again, another achingly beautiful piece ... "her eyes are the spaces between words" ... I like SueAnn's art .. I'll have to pop over to her place now.

william said...

this is what you are renowned for Brian, deep, passionate writing, loved this..

zongrik said...

i like "her eyes are spaces between te words"

depth of field

chiccoreal said...

Dear Brian: A modern day Dorothy or maybe, with the "totters abit" the real-life actress who portrayed, and as life is wont to do, betrayed the young girl. Screams somesort of seething abuse. Excellent write about touching base which unfortunately, in this instance, is not home.

jabblog said...

Driven by need, punished by need - so sad.

Syd said...

Such a hard life to be torn and broken, wrecked by what ever tornado dropped her there. I hope that those ruby shoes take her back home.