Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Bubbles, along the surface of the deep

Dawn is a slow fade, the mystery of night dissipating in the vibrancy of color. A deer nibbles breakfast at the base of the hill, the muscles of his legs as the shift ever so slightly undulate the fur of his body in moving shadows. Birds dip low, briefly land and return to perch in the trees working their catch in their beak.

Through the window, i watch, as warm water fills the sink. My hand strays beneath the faucets stream as i wait. A few dishes remain from last night, remnants of dinner dried on their faces. Around and over it flows, between fingers, lending its heat.

Hours ago, in the shower, i let the cascade beat my neck and work my shoulders, little rivers running through my hair into my beard pulling it down in wet tendrils where the water continued in long lines eventually finding the drain. Steam thickens the air. I like it hot enough to pink my skin, so when she steps in, she gasps and turns the knobs to a more comfortable temperature.

Soap slicks the body as we wash, places we can not reach ourselves. Places we neglect in our day to day, yet feel deep when clean. Everything and nothing gurgling, then gone, and nothing between.

The deer meanders into the woods, meal complete and i lever the water off, sink mostly full and lower the dishes in one by one. They clink and clatter against each other then settle to the bottom, beneath a blanket of bubbles. The sun, now above the trees, pierces the window playing along their skin in swirling rainbows.
written for Theme Thursday

79 comments:

Suz said...

oh this was delightful
I have had such moments at the sink..love hot water o hands in the chilly morning
and the shower...good for you two...
But would you consider dropping the last line...you don't need it.....wonderful writing..as expected....
great details

Gloria said...

what nice, Brian! I dont like so hot the water, ha! warm is nice, ha

Heather said...

wooh, hot stuff -- beneath a blanket of bubbles! love this one

FrankandMary said...

A lot of people cannot put the delicate matrix of life quite this way, but they feel it too.
~Mary

janaki nagaraj said...

A bubbly post.

Adam said...

bubbly awesome

Valerie said...

Excellent write. You know, I imagine your brain dwelling on the sight of each of life's atoms, weaving a tale about every one to enchant your readers. It's phenomenal.

Claudia said...

wow..what a beautiful intimate moment..at peace and deep and warm with love..thanks for sending some of these magic bubbles across blogworld..smiles

Alan Burnett said...

The kind of bubbles that are each full of rainbows Brian.

Brian Miller said...

thanks suz...was not sure on the line and knew it played against the rest but it was almost like the pop of the bubble for me...

for anyone interested, the original closing line was...

'They hiss as they pop, my hands passing through them.'

Daniel said...

Nice work today. It went very well with my lunch!

Pat Hatt said...

Those bubbles seem bubbly and grand
As they bubble about at your land
Hot water is way better too
But to keep things delightfully bubbly I suppose just warm is okay to come due

Who Is Afraid Of Miss Lovett? No, Mrs.Lovett... said...

Hi! Brian...
What a [very] well-written and [very] descriptive poem..."Bubbles, along the surface Of the deep"
Tks, for sharing!
[Yikes! I'm No# 13...[very] Superstitious..you know...lol]
deedee :-/

Rebecca S. said...

'Places we neglect in our day to day, yet feel deep when clean.' I like that a lot.

Anne said...

Your wife is soooo lucky!! A man who does dishes, washes her back (and other fun places and writes verse about it. It's Valentines Day every day at your house. It's lovely how you sync up the morning with the shower and the dishes and bring it all together at the end. Nice work Brian.

Anne Frank said...

Love the contrast between washing the dishes and your shower.Enjoy the simplicity of life =)

Tracey from ⓽ said...

Beautiful writing! Glad I stopped in today. I too like the water hot enough to pink my skin!

Brandee Shafer said...

Aren't we fortunate to have deer in the yard and partners to wash our backs? Dirty dishes, eh. =)

Reena Walkling said...

you so do excel putting words to paper of the meandering thoughts that pass through many of our minds ...

Sub-Radar-Mike said...

I'm pretty sure that the deepest thoughts people ever think is when they're alone in the bathroom, cleaning up while their mind drifts.

Tara Miller said...

I like reading this a lot. There is such a feeling of peace here and of course the steaminess of shower....and verse. Twas a fantastic Valentine dinner and evening ;)

drybottomgirl said...

You cure less romantic! I love hot water in the sink. I would rather wash than dry! Great imagery!

Eva Gallant said...

You do spin a beautiful story with your words. And I think I prefer the original last line. Sometimes you first thought is the best.

Sue said...

I often indulge in similar daydreams. Lovely.

=)

tera said...

Oh what a lovely bit of the day! Thanks for sharing. :)
I wish I could see deer from my kitchen window, but they are elusive, only leaving tracks through the snow in my yard....

Birdie said...

beautiful, simply beautiful!

JeannetteLS said...

One of the most sensual entries about a morning I have ever had the tear-filled pleasure to read. That's all.

Lisa notes... said...

Your words always melt me. Why is that? I read and I feel. It's your gift to the world.

Daydreamertoo said...

How many times and in how many ways can we say.... *sighs* simply divine. From start to end, a wonderful sensual daydream turning the ordinary mundane of every day into the magical.
Lovely.

Josh Hoyt said...

I have always enjoyed washing dishes. It is a good time to think and reflect on moments past.

Mrsupole said...

Hi Brian,

I think after reading this that I will never think the same way about washing dishes again. Way back when they did not have dishwashers, I remember that we would stand there in a daze waiting for the sink to fill up, so I totally see where you are coming from with this. Glad you two had such a wonderful night and so sweet of you to cook dinner.

Thanks for playing in this weeks Theme Thursday, you know how much I love it when you write stories.

God bless.

kaykuala said...

What tender moments, Brian! The sink bane of many tired housewives can bring joy and dreamy hours.Sharing a shower is better yet! You brought it out so well! Great!

Hank

Mary said...

Ah, I like it hot enough to pink my skin too, Brian! As hot as I can tolerate it, feels SO good.

Myrna R. said...

Such a nice glimpse of morning intimacy. Maybe I'll enjoy doing the dishes a little more today.

Nice write Brian.

Fred Rutherford said...

really nice scene you painted here. Love the very different elements deer, dishes, cleansing and how they each entwined into one as the poem moved on. Really nice job, thanks

Heaven said...

I enjoyed the morning capture and the recollection of last night. You got the details so well I can feel that warm water on my hand. An intimate and soft write...I love it, including the ending lines ~

PattiKen said...

Speaking for her, what a nice way to start the day, including her love washing last night's dishes. ;-)

DJan said...

Ah, showering together is always a treat. But having the dishes washed and clean for the next day, that's the best. You're a real catch, Brian. :-)

Secret Agent Woman said...

I have that same shower experience where my boyfriend seems to prefer to be scalded and I like it a saner temperature.

hedgewitch said...

Like how the water floats out the memories here--very sensual, and yet also peaceful, very in tune with the natural image of the deer, living its simple life.

Lisa Golden said...

This is wonderfully sensual. And your muse commented which makes it all the more special, like a secret you let us in on.

Betsy said...

Aw, nice! :)

tracy said...

I know what you did in Valentine's Day! :-)

Ruth said...

this reads like a meditation, not the sitting kind but the kind that one's whole day can ride on, as we go mindfully about our business - beautiful

Victoria said...

I love this, Brian: the circularity, the deer to begin and end and then the zen-like experience of the shower-a-deux. Superb.

Steve E said...

"A morning in the life of a deer--and also a dear. A real treat, Brian!

Semaphore said...

Lots of threads and textures in this tapestry of quiet satisfaction - the deer, the dishes in the sink, the shower, the feel of water, the light. When the world is right, everything fits together, from the cosmological suns to the microscopic bubbles.

ds said...

Wonderful, yes, the man and the deer standing, ruminating...i like the revised ending--more subtle. The flow of your words, like the flow of the water, and...steamy...

Dolly@ Soul Stops said...

Sounds like you had a wonderful Valentine's Day...keep bubbling :)

LadyFi said...

So enchanting - and peaceful.

Zuzana said...

Very sultry and sensual, you sure know how to keep the fire going.;)) As always, I love how you paint an atmosphere with your words.
Have a great rest of the week dear Brian,
xoxo

ayala said...

A beautiful write, Brian. ;)

Dave King said...

I'm going back to read this again -
s-l-o-w-l-y. I committed the cardinal sin, rushing it in my anxiety to read the next line. My one excuse: completely hooked. Even rushed, it was beautiful.

Luke Prater said...

like your prose work, as I've said before I think... were you writing prose before poetry? You do both v well. Interesting to see how these things develop for other people, always something to learn from our peers, eh?

Mama Zen said...

This is just pretty, Brian! I really like this.

SueAnn said...

Beautifully written Brian!! With your words I could feel the heat of the water and see the steam on the bathroom mirror....so soothing
Hugs
SueAnn

Postcardy said...

I wash dishes in the sink, but they are in the sink before I turn on the water and make bubbles. Yesterday I cut my hand on a glass that broke and was hidden by the bubbles.

4U2 said...

Self, I shower in almost cold water compared to the rest of the family. Nice written.

Manicddaily said...

Very nice--I like especially that the dishes have the faces, while the people are their limbs and bodies; the people (not the dishes) also the ones getting deeply clean. (Ha.) K.

Lolamouse said...

Ah, contentment.

Magpie said...

So tactile this one, Brian. You have the ability to allow us to share the moment with you.

Geraldine said...

you even make dishes sound appealing Brian! oh laaaalaaa....

Alyssa Santos said...

I love the bits of personification you slip in, the faces of the plates and them sinking under a blanket of bubbles. And you notice things, really notice - I appreciate that.

Alyssa Santos said...

I love the bits of personification you slip in, the faces of the plates and them sinking under a blanket of bubbles. And you notice things, really notice - I appreciate that.

Leah said...

both light and rich...I have missed reading your writing!

Leovi said...

Muy bueno. Me encanta lo caliente odio el frío.

Leovi said...

Very good. I love what I hate the cold hot.

Nimue said...

Whoa ! I just wished this went on and on .. i was so much in the flow.. in this scene i suppose... b'ful ..

G-Man said...

Now Son...
I hope that those places left unwashed were metaphors!
I may have some spots I can't see, but I can reach them..Hehehehehe

♫♪♥PhilO♥♪♫ said...

Every writing of yours leaves me wondering! How do you come up with such stuff :)

Steve Isaak said...

Great interplay of language and imagery/sensory info.

Okie said...

very vibrant and sensory. this is fabulous. well done.

California Girl said...

You are just like my husband. He likes it hot hot hot. I always turn down the hot water too.

I think I'm back.

Happy TT Brian!

Kris said...

Oh, I like that!

TALON said...

Took me right into this moment, Brian. It's finding the extraordinary in the ordinary and you do it so well.

Sarah in Maine said...

This is gooood.
Thank you...
visual impact with words...
magnificent.
Peace.
Siggi in Downeast Maine

Anonymous said...

Wonderful, deep descriptions. I could feel it all, especially the temperature of the water. It's perfect when the shower hurts a little bit. And that can be some of the best together time.

~Shawna
rosemarymint.wordpress.com

Syd said...

We often shower together and soap each other. Very nice with a warm fire in the bathroom and steam rising.

Goofball said...

well, as you might now I absolutely hate getting up early. I don't care what happens before I wake up spontaneously, I am grumpy for the first hour of my day


but a morning like you describe does sound attractive to me