The toothbrush sits
head slightly turned
waiting for you---
to open your mouth
she wont press
just leave you
the choice
bacteria slowly eating
your need for her
What can can you say in 160 characters? Say it, then tell Monkey.
Also for Poetry Jam, whose prompt this week is still life.
Posts
55 comments:
Such deep double meaning with this 160. Thanks for playing along, Brian.
Oh yes! Double trouble!
But isn't that a form of passive aggressive? After all, simply by being the toothbrush must remind you to brush.
Wow.. very good. I think I'll go brush now. ;)
I think I need to go brush my teeth again now
Bacteria just gave me an ewww feeling some how..haha
Of course the deeper meaning the cat can see
Have to keep at it or the one may flee
I cannot stand to have my teeth missing their old friend, the toothbrush. Made me run my tongue over my teeth to see if I needed a visit. :-)
smiles..is that how you convince your boys to brush their teeth...? great metaphor for taking over responsibility far, far beyond brushing teeth..
Going to go hang out with my own toothbrush ....
Excellent! What a great closing line!
"bacteria slowly eating your need for her"
Concise and exquisitely done!
The power of the toothbrush...Never quite thought of it that way :-)
Fantastic double meaning there!
Just this week have to go to the dentist in spite of all that brushing!
Very deep and full of meaning. Wonderful, once again Brian.
Excellent, Brian! (I don't like to think about bacteria on toothbrushes though. Ewww.) Photo enhances your words. Thank you for visiting Poetry Jam!!
I just blushed, but after that one, I feel I still need to brush some more.
How odd, I brushed before I came here. Are you now into telepathy?
Brush yes, but do you floss?
Why do I find myself running my tongue over my teeth right now?
did you mean to open *your* mouth ?
i like the meaning behind the short poem...i think i need to brush again ~
Best poem about toothbrushes that I've read all week.
Bacterium and love go hand in glove!
Somehow this makes me NOT want to brush my teeth.
This is wonderful! How was Richmond?
:) nice!
Responsibility is all about the little things--and there's always some decay when you blow if off.
OhMyGoodness - so much said in so few words. I want to know if you used it! :-)
Neatly done, Brian!
=)
Liked your twist. :)
You always say so much in so few words, love! Aaaah, choices - no need for words - most of the time we know the right choice to make, just have to take that step.
Simply said...
Wow ... love it! Glad I just brushed!
Eeewww! Wonder if this would help me get my kid to brush . . .
something simple as a toothbrush turned into a lesson of choices :)
Smiles ...
hey that is my line...smiles. happy sunday daniel...
Brushing my teeth has taken on a whole new meaning.
Very clever, Brian...
You can say what you said. It is all that was needed. Well done.
Ooooo! Bacteria eating your need for her...now that is raw!!!!
Great 160!!
Hugs
SueAnn
Wow...all that from a lonely toothbrush. Who knew?
Who knew brushing your teeth could get you thinking?
If you go long enough the bacteria will grow and then you will have a green steak to gum your way through.
Wonderful post Sir Brian!
Have a great week ahead...
JJRod'z
guilt even from a toothbrush..... Love it!
Nice ! Thanks- (I was away but I am going to read these anyway)
I'm not letting bacteria hurt me again, I love this and I have missed you
wholesome 160.
everyone shall brush twice a day.
Brush-a, Brush-a, Brush-a. Nice write, thanks
ha! You can choose her or a long visit with the dreaded dentist! We all know the dentist always likes us to stay a long, long time :)
this is cool....just brushed!
Where are toothbrushes on the list of the things with the most bacteria? There has to be a top ten list--shopping carts, door handles, etc.
ok, let me ready that a couple of more times to ensure I catch it all.
wow that was really creative... Nice work man
I love your short poems. Just the essentials. Shadows of former lives vivid.
I have been sitting here reading this one again and again. This will be added to the list of favorites (I know, I know. The list is basically everything you write, but I mean it every time. I have to use my worn out phrase again; I love this one.)
:)
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