Tuesday, October 18, 2011

OpenLinkNight: I wish I was a sex phone operator

There are days I wish I was a phone sex operator---

I met one once and that cured me of ever feeling
the need to make that call because she was nothing
like any wet dream fantasy I ever had, so I know
I would qualify---

And when you'd call I'd know you wanted me
or what you wanted me to be and would tell me
in minute detail exactly what that was---

Super-size with fries on the side, some ex-boyfriend
you still think about but only when life at the house
becomes too much, how you wish your husband was
or was when you first met, long lost to too much
Monday Night Football beer---

"It's a gas tank for a love machine, baby!"

A-her, A-her, he laughs like Gomer Pyle, or perhaps
it's your daddy you want, to read a bedtime story,
a guy on the bus, your boss or some stranger whose
name is no longer important---

Maybe you just need someone to remind you once
more you are beautiful, a gardener, bare chested
in rubber boots with a long nosed water can to damp
your desert and plant deep the seed of meaning
in the womb mirror you look in each morning---

But don't confuse my motives as altruistic in answering
that phone, I'd pick up and in asking that initial question,
"What is it you want?", because it sometimes seems easier
to tell the anonymous than the intimate, at $4.99 a minute
it's far less than the cost of this silence---

gain understanding and feel like i might finally
stand a chance at delivering, because i'm just a man and

There are days I wish I was a phone sex operator.

OpenLinkNight @ dVerse Poets Pub - where we get crazy versifying and poeticizing and just loving on each other. Even if you dont write a poem, feel free to stop in and meet some of the amazing people. Doors open today at 3 pm EST.

122 comments:

Mrsupole said...

Hah

Mrsupole said...

Hah again!!

Mrsupole said...

Sometimes I get lucky

God bless.

Eva Gallant said...

You'd probably be excellent at it!

Uneven Stephen said...

Awesome poem! I love the free-flow structure. "because it sometimes seems easier / to tell the anonymous than the intimate, at $4.99 a minute" - fantastic! Thanks for the great read.

JeannetteLS said...

Boy, do I get it. Well. I mean I understand exactly... I mean. Well.

Good poem.

Mrsupole said...

I did that once and it is ok till they want real sex. Then you run and run for your life. Just never know.

God bless.

Gwen Dubeau said...

Nice and very truthful on many levels..

Peace friend and thanks for this!

kaykuala said...

You get a feeling things are meant to be shared. Such calls can linger on and on. The snag is that the talk transcript can be elicited from the cell-phone company by those who may not have reasons to.

Hank

manicddaily said...

Hi Brian, So funny (I mean the next coincidence not the poem). I have a teen novel about to come out that involves a brief job at a phone sex office. It's a provocative topic, for sure. (Carl Hiassen has a funny send-up in one novel, I think it's Stormy Weather.)

Your treatment has a bit more angst. Very interesting. K.

manicddaily said...

Also, interesting that you speak in terms of sex phone, not phone sex. Need to contemplate this!

K.

Sue said...

Here's to breaching that silence...

=)

PS. You may be "just a man," but you strike me as a uniquely perceptive one.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Wouldn't be a bad job, as jobs go. I mean there is the whole anonimity thing going on. No real contact. Hmmmm...........

Pat Hatt said...

haha that's one wish you can keep
Not a a leap, I'd want to go, of course I suppose for $4.99 a minute I might be swayed to join the show. Although with the loons one the other end, they could be quite scary as each answer they send. Love the rubber boots line, got a laugh from the feline, as it was pictured in my head, oh where this dVerse piece lead.

Myrna R. said...

Sex phone. Artificial, anonymous false intimacy, yet real fantasies. I guess it does make for an interesting job.

ayala said...

Oh wow, Brian. This is awesome!!!!!!!!!!

Brandee Shafer said...

You're going to get some serious google traffic over this one. I'm almost jealous, but not quite.

Well done.

Daydreamertoo said...

Ohh wowww you did it again. Fascinating to peep inside your mind at times. ;)
Wonderful read!

Cathleen said...

The paradox of real/fantasy and the truth that lies somewhere between. Interesting write.

David Allen Waters said...

dude, I am a phone sex operator, how did you know? ;)

Daniel said...

This is a new topic for you, but as I have learned, you are not afraid to tackle anything, anywhere, any time. Good stuff stud muffin!

hedgewitch said...

"it's far less than the cost of this silence-" got a little jolt from that one, and a little sad from the whole thing--but the truth is often a little sad. That occupation must really open your eyes about life, I'd think, and you paint the process well here.

chromapoesy.com said...

My original comment disappeared! So, I appreciate your sense of adventure and intellectual liberty in your writing. This poem made me think about the nature of intimacy and fantasy. Sex phone, hmmm, someone is probably working on that invention as we speak :).

Mama Zen said...

Um, can I get your number?

Very cool write, Brian!

happygirl said...

Is this for real? Women make these calls? If so, you go for it mr. mr. 'cause you're the man with the words. Can't get that kitty cat poem outta my mind. *blush*

JJ Roa Rodriguez said...

wish i could also be... hahaha!... for sure you'll earn a lot. :-)

nice flow of idea!

JJRod'z

Brian Miller said...

smiles. as many of you already guessed this is a metaphor or skin for a large issue which is lack of communication and understanding between partners...how we then seek shelter of anonymous relationship where it is much easier to express our selves because what is really at stake...thus the desire to be a sex phone or phone sex operator is to get to the the unsaid things...

missing moments said...

Wow .. powerful! Especially "because it sometimes seems easier / to tell the anonymous than the intimate, at $4.99 a minute"

Claudia said...

an awesome poem with a straight message - think we need to question ourselves who we tell what - as you say, it's easier to tell "difficult" things in an anonymous environment. it's a learning process but being aware of it makes for a good first step..

Who Is Afraid Of Miss Lovett? No, Mrs.Lovett... said...

Hi! Brian...
Thanks, for sharing a very thought-provoking,and honest poem...Your explanation just confirmed my "suspicions."

[Note: It's not fair Brian, that Mrsupole is No#1,2,3, I should have been No#2 or 3...and her final comment warrants a lol]

Ty for sharing!
deedee ;-D

ipenka said...

With your writing, you may be a better text sex operator!

jen revved said...

This poem is beautifully crafted, Brian-- Each stanza flows to each with beautful enjambment, so to speak-- I see much growth in your work! xxxxj

theborgpoet said...

loneliness

Anthony Desmond said...

excellent poem brian!

really liked this part: "... a gardener, bare chested
in rubber boots with a long nosed water can to damp
your desert..." I wouldn't mind that, myself. heheheh

johnallenrichter said...

Great poem Brian! But..... don't wait up for my call.... It's hair wash night, and then I've got this whole thing later, it's just frantic.... maybe tomorrow.... but keep the fries warm.......

robkistner said...

sex passion insecurity loneliness rejection familiarity loss failure anger resentment denial -- a potent recipe to fire the libido, and to drive one to foolish depravity and self-deprecation... enjoyed this Brian...

Suzy Q said...

Ahh the shattered illusions :)
and I love the free structured verse here!

Rachel Hoyt said...

Hahaha. It definitely sounds entertaining, but I don't think I'm that much of a chameleon. :)

HyperCRYPTICal said...

I love this Brian despite it making me feel quite sad.

I have never thought that some of the motives for calling a sex line could be as you describe - but I am sure that they are.

Anna :o]

Beachanny said...

This is outside my experience but I like how you said what you said and I think "help" can be found in the center of loneliness in a number of ways - many include making phone calls. I think you know and understand that. I've taken many calls in the middle of the night on old phones thinking the phone cord was a life line. Well written, and original as always!

Mark Kerstetter said...

The high cost of silence is the core of this poem - the longer it goes on the higher the bill.

Dulce said...

love your sheltering of it all between beginning and end... and i guess this is another such up-to- date issue.. now your voice would be enough to have it! that's why these phones work!! :-) smiles

velvetinapurrs said...

Really enjoyed the playful nature of this, & the deeper observation, how people retreat into silence, and can't always bridge the gap with those 'close', but can be superfically closer, reaching out & into 'the comfort of strangers'

Louise said...

Made me laugh but felt the sadness underneath...(reckon you'd be great though) ;)

Fred said...

Brian, can't say I'd ever thought about being a phone sex operator but seeing I need to find a job to do from home it might be an option-lol Fun write, I could never get why anyone would call these lines, outside of desperation of loneliness I really can't imagine anyone doing it, but they do, that's the funny part for me, and the things they must say is hilarious to think about- Yeah, I'd get fired in a minute, probably first call- laughing out loud- that 4.99 spot was perfect and great read, thanks

Patricia said...

that intimacy thing is expensive all right...hard work with no guarantees. Don't quit your day job, though. =)

California Girl said...

I find this easy to identify with. I have empathy for her and sympathy for him. I get how she feels. But that's a relationship.

Natasha said...

Who told you about my gardener!? ;) And the prude takes another blow...um, yeah, anyway! Where in the world! Handing out grilled cheeses and saving all these little pearls of wisdom for yourself. I bet you'd do real good too! lol Stellar write, Brian...and you don't want to know what my mind is seeing! Great fun...and wise words within.

Heaven said...

Nice insights on "real" intimacy versus "perceived or imagined" between two people. Real intimacy requires work, work, work, every day. And I must commend you for the great use of the metaphor in delvering your message.

secret agent woman said...

I always assume those people are pretty unappealing in real life. And it's sad, to me, if some faceless person at the other end of a phone line (or cell signal) is the best someone can do for intimacy.

marousia said...

Haha - this made me laugh - fun to contemplate but I'd run and run in real life

Joanne Elliott said...

There is someting about speaking to an anonymous being, that stranger you'll never see again whether on a plane or on the phone...I'm guessing some things are more easily said on the phone. ;-) It's too bad we can't always talk to those close to us, but thank goodness for anonymous.

Laurie Kolp said...

Brian- Powerful... I especially like "at $4.99 a minute
it's far less than the cost of this silence---"

lori said...

I know a lot of people feel this way, so I know I'm so fortunate to have someone in my life that I can tell everything, good and bad. On a side note, I couldn't help but think of the movie Punch-Drunk Love with Adam Sandler. It's a dark movie, but he gets into a huge mess for calling one of those numbers just to have someone to talk to. Sad that one would feel they had to resort to that just to be heard. Great poem! As always :)

libithina said...

really ? :)
but think you'd be good Brian as an Agony Uncle ~ had some good insights there ~ telling beautiful anytime ~ offering understanding ~ about errant husbands ~ yep think you'd have a lot to offer ~ ~
Ahh such imagery w/you sitting back coffee in hand ~ delivering such gems of insightfulness :)
Lib xx

Charles Elliott/Beautyseer said...

Wonderful. So often it seems so difficult to speak of love in a way that is satisfying both to yourself and your beloved. Perhaps it would enhance communication if you indulged in phone sex with your actual love object? I know firsthand -- so to speak -- that cybersex can do that! ( X0= >

the walking man said...

Some background music for your new occupation It does seem that communication gets both harder and easier when two people just simply want to talk.

darkangelwrites said...

I imagine that each on either end of the phone pretend they are talking to someone not even closely resembling the truth. I'm kinda happy for them in their moment of make believe.

Anyes said...

"...Stand a chance at delivering" Is it all what men really want, could it be so simple?

joel w. clackum said...

There is an unspoken sense of longing to be needed or effective, despite whatever gain may be in store, that seems innate to the narrator. I enjoyed and felt pain at what could be interpreted as a sort of silent impotence. I really loved the style, structure and the rhythm of the poem. It moves well.

Cinner said...

I would not imagine it would be a great job, although I did know a girl that was one, she looked nothing what I would have imagined either. Sad that there are so many lonely people. smiles.

Victoria said...

Bwa-ha-ha! This could make you some good money and you could write some unusual poetry. In a job I had ten years ago or so my direct line was a numeral different from an 800 introductory number for such a service. And every so often someone wanted more than Oxygen service.

Cloudia said...

you saw behind the curtain
and now you long to be the magician
not the 'mark'


Aloha from Waikiki;

Comfort Spiral



> < } } ( ° >

Josh Hoyt said...

Food for thought that is for sure :)

Tara Miller said...

Ok, so not as much of a bash as I thought - ;). I did get the underlying message of this when I read it again and know that communication is extremely important in relationships no matter how difficult the subject. A good write my love!

Christine said...

Ask me what I'm wearing Brian.

Magpie said...

Well, what's stopping you? I know you would be hugely successful at it with the way you turn a phrase. :)

Me said...

You describe so many relationships I know of here, Brian. Powerful stuff.

And with a title like this, you are pretty much guaranteed a lot of traffic...so your message will definitely reach the masses. ;)

yellowhousecafe said...

A fabulous write, as always, with some killer lines. "sur-prize sur-prize" we don't communicate anywhere anymore...it trickles down, too, the kids riding around in minivans to DVDs not convo.. excellent commentary here ~

lynne said...

Hmm..in today's economy might not be such a bad thing.. and you remain faithful to your partner..
(Just joking..or not..lol)

Great read.. fun.. you can come up with some creative a shell poetry!!

colleen said...

Of course I'm playing out this premise in a poem in my own mind now. The stanza Maybe you just need...gardener and etc really slammed it. And I like the way it closed like a button at the end.

Jackie Dick said...

I was curious once and phoned, and then ran like hell. Wish people would stop saying it's sad...As a habit, yeah, but for curiosity...no...very human. So, Brian...you have a little business on the side? Whoa! Have fun, kiddo!

Kat_RN said...

That one is a little rough! Good, but rough.
Kat

Slamdunk said...

As you discuss--lots of reasons for folks to seek.

I really don't think it would look impressive on your professional resume though.

Teri said...

Funny how things end up. Wishing for something lost. Asking for something wanted. It's all in how you approach the day I guess. Or the life (style). Anonymous, intimate. Can you be both simultaneously? Hmmm...don't think so but maybe??? Again, how you approach.

Sheila Moore said...

it is sad but some people just don't have anyone to talk to. If it were me I would go to a clergyman before a sex phone operator (ok I feel like I just set myself up.)

I once heard of a very poor and lonely man who would spend what little money he made on a haircut once a month because it was the only time he was ever touched by another human being.

mrs mediocrity said...

So many layers, I love them all. Why is it that it can be easier to share our secrets with strangers than those we know and love? And can we ever know what it is like to be the opposite sex?

Great job with this.

Mari said...

I can absolutely relate to this one!
Nearly as intriguing as your poems are the comments on them. I'm not sure I'm supposed to enjoy them almost as much as the blog, but I really do.

So thanks for the post, and for having such fabulously eloquent readers!

ds said...

"at $4.99 a minute/it's far less than the cost of this silence."

All there. Perfect and succinct. It is so much easier to bare our souls to the unseen. How many relationships falter because Monday Night Football (or Desperate Housewives) is easier to watch than another's face?

KB said...

Reminds me of a movie I saw recently. Love it.

Ann LeFlore said...

Hsh I think you would be excellent at this well done great read
http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/18/farewell-my-three-legged-friend/

lifeisaroadtrip said...

Okay, so when I read the title of your post, I thought "Brian, you kinda ARE!". LOL. (Not that I would know or anything!)

Help! Mama Remote... said...

Bwahahaha. LOL too funny.

Jyoti Mishra said...

Its just awesome..
very cleverly put :)

Arnab Majumdar said...

I hope you do a reading of this. The poem deserves it. :)

Cheers,
Arnab Majumdar on SribbleFest.com

adeeyoyo said...

Are you sure you don't already do it on the side, Brian? You sound like you know what goes on and the going rate, lol! No, seriously I suppose there is a place for these people, but I doubt you should/could be one. Unless you use the job for counselling...

Selina Kingston said...

"Maybe you just need someone to remind you once more you are beautiful"......
I'd call you !!

Dave King said...

A gas tank for a love machine? Everyone should have one!

Deb said...

You paint quite a picture with your words...and it did leave a sense of sadness within. Take care.

Rallentanda said...

A gardener bare chested in rubber boots with a long nosed water can to dampen your desert.. Definitely a Monty Python image.Hilarious!
Still laughing. I wonder how you invent this stuff...or is it your reading list?

Ravenblack said...

I think you should give it a try. I don't know, it sounds like fun to do at least once. If I do it, I wouldn't know how to keep from laughing though. Thanks for this funny poem. I needed it today. :D

beckykilsby said...

'the cost of this silence..' it all leads to this... But I had a great time getting there...

kez said...

awwww but you can send me the gardener round ! great poem thanks x

Little Ms Blogger said...

I've learned it is easier to tell a complete stranger your deepest secrets, but harder to tell the ones closest to you the truth for fear of rejection from a loved one.

I have many random just share something incredibly personal with me and I let them. I figure they need to get it off their chest and, most times, it only takes 20 minutes of my time. I offer not comments or advice, but I do listen in hopes they'll be able to share what they need to with the one they love.

Jeff said...

I don't think I ever want to meet a phone sex operator, but I bet your title will get you many new "hits" to your blog, folks who will be surprised to find poetry!

Margaret said...

A lot to think about here. I would imagine there is a large percentage of callers that just want to feel desired, wanted. Someone who wants companionship. Very sad. And of course, there are the others... It sounds a bit creepy to me....

The Empress said...

I began reading this, thinking it'd be about men ( of course) but it can be about women.

Kerry O'Connor said...

You make a very meaningful statement here about modern relationships, the lack of human contact, which has people searching for some additional meaning they just know should be out there.

Thanks for the comment on Misery. I added the link to dVerse. Very bad manners of me - being in too much of a rush is no excuse.

gautami tripathy said...

:D

liv2write2day said...

I think blogger has a grudge against me...I'm sure I had posted a comment before. This is so fun, Brian. Just think of the money you could be making. I love your take on things.

tinkwelborn said...

Risible, doleful, sensuous, fantastic.
the turn at the end brings the reader back to the real situation.
good piece.

Shadiatique said...

Well when you succeed please remember your friends ;)

The Idea is brilliant,

Whosyergurl said...

Catching up. WHOA you got a lot of responses to this one...but I'm not surprised. Do you remember the old video (I know you are younger than I, but not by how much, or maybe you had older sibs.) Anyway, the woman who was the phone sex operator was ironing and had on a robe and curlers in her hair and she was way over weight...it was funny. I actually have one of those voices and have had to work to NOT sound that way...except for the brief time on my cell phone when my message said..."I'm tied up right now..." in "that voice." ;-)
Cheryl

Pat said...

I'd have your number on speed dial. snort.

Cassiopeia Rises said...

Wow, this is totally new information to me. Never been there or done that. On a whole this is great and informing.

Melanie

Goofball said...

sometimes I want to have a visit inside your brain....the stuff & images you come up with, and that do touch all of us

Ed Pilolla said...

with sex or other deep things, it's fascinating that we can open up so much easier to strangers than someone close. what's at stake, you say. good stuff to gnaw on.

Quotes,Photos and a little Poetry said...

Do they still have them.LoL, You'd probably do very well.

Julie said...

This is one of those poems that draws my attention immediately and keeps me thinking in lines like this: "don't confuse my motives as altruistic in answering
that phone"
Nice impact & definitely has me thinking of communication or lack of it.

eclipsingwinter said...

I clicked the link and instantly knew I had to read every word. Your mind is a fascinating machine. Although throughout the poem, you took a light-hearted look at the job (hee), I got the sense toward the end that asking a question and getting an answer was appealing, as though strangers are easier to confide in. Don't mind my rambling. It has been a long day and yours is the last poem that I'm reading before my bedtime :0 What dreams will that stir?

Truly enjoyed and simply amazed at your talent, Brian. *smiling*

Beth

joanna said...

eh. maybe I'm reading this a little differently now that I do have a face and a voice to go with it. ;) love the lines "at 4.99 a minute
it's far less than the cost of this silence---..." profound.

can't wait to hear more of your poetry live. :)

Anonymous said...

you do qualify.

fun way to carry out your message,
well penned.

;)

C Rose said...

Enjoyed this piece Brian! Your ability to tie the way we silently suffer into the humor of our current world is really spot on and 4.99 a minute! I guess inflation does hit everything :D ~ Rose

She Writes said...

OH my gosh. Well... Who knew?

waysidewordgarden said...

This is a creative way of presenting the divide that can occur in relationships; it makes me sad to think that some seek this route; and sad that relationships are allowed to get this way. Another thoughtful write, Brian.

Kodjo Deynoo. said...

Loved this, this was brilliant man, lol

Bajanpoet said...

Brian this poem had me smiling :) Great subject and take on it. Usually a phone sex operator is seen as female, but you twisting it and being a male one really hit home :) Nice :)

"Super-size with fries on the side, some ex-boyfriend
you still think about but only when life at the house...."

Love it :)

Heather said...

AWESOME!!!!! I love it! Been feeling under the weather...this cheered me up!

Glynn said...

Maybe this is what theymean by writers needing to have a "voice." Good one, Brian.

Shashi said...

Dear Brian

So beautifully you brought out the act in the second paragraph... worked out the fantasy in fine details.. and then comes the crescendo in your line...
'it's far less than the cost of this silence---'
I agree with you so much... Liked it.

Shashi
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/10/whispers-wet-and-sandy-beach.html
Connect with me At Twitter @VerseEveryDay

Syd said...

I never thought about that as a career. But as I've heard, nothing sells like sex. You probed some heavy stuff in this one about loneliness and longing.

Lolamouse said...

I'd be tempted to call and ask for you, baby! ;)