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| Painting by Bonnie @ Original Art Studio |
A blind man, eyes packed with spit
made mud and sent, out the city,
everything familiar, healed and the
first thing he sees---people.
and I am
Rowdy Roddy Piper, in
They Live, with Keith David
forced into dark sun glasses, now able
to see the unseen, what lies beyond
and beneath, both alien and strang-
ers..err...
i see souls, see saw souls,
shadows and light, they more than
walk among us, they are us,
none all one, see--
there's always a little light in the pitch
or vice versa, spider web cracks stitched
interstate maps to inner states and open
mouths are WMDs whistling before they
explode or spill rainbows down chins
then pool across the space between us
there is no independence, we are in this
and together---when a light winks or dims,
when a shadow lightens or deepens, we know,
our bones more attune then our senses,
yet we pursuing ourselves senseless
this is the essence, we are palletes of color
over sixty percent water, opaque and blending
borders as we re-imag-in things yet unseen
on the horizon, it's coming---
A blind man, eyes packed with spit
made mud and sent, out the city,
everything familiar, healed and the
first thing he sees---people.
Today at dVerse Poets Pub, I am hosting Poetics where we are passing out new eyes and fresh perspectives...don't miss the opportunity to see the unseen...pick up your pair and write a poem. It opens at 3 pm EST. See you there.
Posts
83 comments:
the 4th verse is incedible... so much ground covered... really like the use of language and terms
The blind man has a gift, sees the "real" person or people. If we can have this gift, then perhaps our life will be more meaningful, then to learn something in "hindsight."
I like these lines:
"This is the essence, we are palletes of color
over sixty percent water, opaque and blending
borders as we re-imag-in things yet unseen
on the horizon, it's coming--- "
See you later~
Love this, Brian, and it is masterfully done.
My favorite line, though, is not one of the meaty (and yes, this is meaty!) ones.
It's this clever little trick...
both alien and strang-
ers..err...
And I like the "see saw souls," too.
=)
only you could melt together a scene from the bible and Rody piper wrestler exr=trodinare...and it all works perfectly, bravo :)
Whoa. I see dead people, and a lot more. Amazing poem, Brian. As always, your prompts boldly go where no wo/man has gone before. This is some hairy stuff, and very cleanly and sharply presented--fourth fifth and six stanzas ratchet it up, and the repeat at the end is the serpent's kiss sealing the deal.
hahaha you used rotten rotten ripper
That was a such a gripper
I never went for him
He seemed to grim
Doink the Clown was for me
He caused such glee
Truth about the blind man too
Eyes don't always tell the tale to you
Sometimes they are better shut
Then in a typical gazing rut
Eyes full of spit... Yuck!
I love how you describe all the nitty gritty things of life Brian, no holds barred.
We humans are just that, human and therefore full of faults yet, so very precious, too.
Love this!
I read this aloud to myself and I really like the rhythm and flow of it.
we're in this together, there's no independence - the space between us - you so perfectly capture all the blending and bleeding going on between us humans without ever been seen physically, sometimes barely noticed but happening all the time. i fell heavily in love with the whole fourth stanza - this is just powerful stuff and feels like someone spilled a color rain upon me
There verse that begins with "There's no independence..." really speaks to me. So often we forget this and yet we are nothing alone, we are all meant to be attuned to one another. What a thought provoking piece.
true that colleen...th biblical reference is to a rather obscure miracle...only a few sentences...but it resonates with me as the man had to leave everything that would have been comfortable to him to be healed...
A remarkable and thoughtful piece of poetry. Made me stop and think ... and that is good!
I would love to have permission to feature this poem on www.punksoulpoet.com. I think that it would make a nice addition to the next edition of our online 'zine.
If you're interested, please email me at: celeste(at)punksoulpoet.com
Cool, Brian... I really like 4th and 5th stanzas.
You hit that one out of the park. I agree that the 4th stanza rocks, big time. I was with you on the Bible reference, but had never thought about what it would be like to see after not doing so...jumble of colors, all racing towards you in a kaleidoscope, cascading and overwhelming. And yeah, there are things I'd rather not see about people...yet they continue to show them and in doing so, disappoint. Been a tough week in our extended family.
Tina @ Life is Good
i re-read it after reading your response to colleen. so he finds healing in the people, or in finding them.
it's really powerful, and it also has your coy sense of humor. the art is fricking fabulous for the piece, especially as it opens.
You have written a brilliant poem with a rowdy roddy piper(legend)reference - this is a keeper baby (a keeeeeper!)
HULKAMANIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I really like the biblical lead in and fade out. There are so many things that are right there in front of us and we have eyes but do not see. Skillful.
Loved the spiritual story woven throughout and the movement of the piece.
I like this verse:
there is no independence, we are in this
and together---when a light winks or dims,
when a shadow lightens or deepens, we know,
our bones more attune then our senses,
yet we pursuing ourselves senseless
So Ture! Love the way your words blend and strikes when you want them to. Wonderful poem!
This is seeing with one's eyes closed, packed with the mud of an ancient salvation; it's listening to a frequency between day and night; it's touching something that doesn't have a real shape except in a dream. Great explication of what a poem can achieve. - Brendan
Another great write...you leave us with much to chew on! I've always liked this story from the Bible and think the blind man saw (souls) better than some of those with sight. So often we get caught up in life that we don't slow down enough to actually "see" others the way He wants us to. What a different world this would be if we did.
This piece is packed with thought-provoking material Brian. With the see saw souls, I am of see saw mind.
Did you have parts of the poems in mind and the image fit - or did you work from the image? An honor for me to have it paired up with your work ... Thank you.
there's always a little light in the pitch
or vice versa, spider web cracks stitched
interstate maps to inner states and open
mouths are WMDs whistling before they
explode or spill rainbows down chins
then pool across the space between us
Marvelous, the whole piece packed with spiritual truth and love. I love it!
Lots to say. Faith and the power to believe. And miracles. And self realization. And knowlegde of what sight is. Very good write. Opened my eyes.
I used to call the WWF hotline to listen toRowdy Roddy's message! That made me laugh...but the poem, despite the fierce flow, speaks volumes about the unseen...we are one, no way around that...I like your magic Poet, weave those words!
This is very surrealistic, and I see it through a glass darkly, but I feel it much more. What I feel is the vision that we are all one, that we make our world together. Stanzas 4-6 really outstanding.
First of all, Brian, good on you for a terrific challenge today at poetics. Secondly, there is much to admire in your poem-- for me it begins with the I see souls see saw-- I think you could keep the next four stanzas and drop off the muddy eye idea in first and last... that often happens to me-- I end up shedding the first fumbling lines as I find a groove--xxxj
our bones are more attune then our senses...see the unseen...these are my favorite lines...
enjoy your weekend, - we've got company....IRENE! :)
see saw souls, this really stuck out for me
see saw souls
see saw spirits
see saw ghosts
reminds me of Sara Conner's nighmare, see second 39 of http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BR_midwZ2f0
A thought provoking and great poem...have a great weekend.
They were unseen until he removed the mud packs someone told him to use. Great poem, Brian.
Brian, Really nice write, haven't thought of They Live in like 20 or so years lol Some nice wordplay in here as well and absolutely love the last few stanzas
Very nice! But scary. Just think if we could look at a person and really see the truth about them--the whole truth, the way God sees. Wouldn't that change everything?
Oh, and that painting is gorgeous!
I liked how you ended with the same stanza, a nice justification and realization sweeps the course.
What an incredible talent you have--I'm in awe. I liked the phrase "...interstate maps to inner states..."--cool!
Powerful piece, Brian. We are in this together. I wish any of us could see as clearly as the blind man.
This is incredible...
my first thought as I started to read the poem how like having waxed paper like cataracts removed...
you had me think back to the trust that people who are blind must have for many reasons, to trust in where they are...that they are where the person says they are, what they are wearing to not be ridiculed
and then
more and more phrases brought other wondrous images.
Wonderful poem.
Thank you very much.
☮ ♥ Siggi in Downeast Maine
we are pallets of colors, that is what we are.
This is really cool. And, They Live rocks!
ooh....really liked this one. Yes, leave the comfort to experience the healing....practice a little faith to see the results.
This is a beautiful picture of how we are all connected. . . and the healing of the blind man, well done.
I liked all of this especially this as I know this is true: "this is the essence, we are palletes of color
over sixty percent water, opaque and blending borders as we re-imag-in things yet unseen on the horizon, it's coming--- "
Great write, sir! Thanks for the comments on mine as well. G.
Isn't it amazing how much a blind man can see....and how so little some can't see...depending on which "blind man" one chooses to be?...I pray to God I've chosen the shoes of the right one...
PS Glad to see you posting and know that you're safe. Was concerned about you and a few other bloggie friends. Just saying...
This made no sense until I read your explanation of the man having to leave everything familiar to be healed...that makes perfect sense. I've had to do that once or twice. Great job, as usual.
I love this, Brian. I think this is what heaven is like. Our souls are part of one whole and we all see things the same way. We are indeed one great big brotherhood.
I just love you sneak biblical references in your writings - they carry so much meaning and Truth. awesome prompt and poem, brian.
ooops - that was supposed to say that I love WHEN you sneak...whew - its late, I am going to bed :)
Loved the way you started it...
as usual... I great post :) :)
this is the essence, we are palletes of color
over sixty percent water, opaque and blending
borders as we re-imag-in things yet unseen
on the horizon, it's coming---
These lines caught m e:)
very very beautiful !!
a stunner piece.
Every stanza is my new favorite... The word play, play with sounds, images, insight... This is a third-I you have :)
And although each word, space, dash and comma is in it's meaningful place, this is my fav. stanza~
this is the essence, we are palletes of color
over sixty percent water, opaque and blending
borders as we re-imag-in things yet unseen
on the horizon, it's coming---
~ deb
ps - the image/painting is spectacular !
I really liked that we're palletes of colour...that blend over borders,an interesting poem that I would really like to read over a few times.
Pallets of colours we see around us. Even the blind can make out in their own minds. And Roddy Piper? Never did see him fight but he blabbered a lot.
This is powerful yet sensitive work.
Maggie X
Nuts in May
The colour of our soul oh Brian, sometimes you just touch me so
The lines that made me shiver...
'open
mouths are WMDs whistling before they
explode or spill rainbows down chins'
so painfully true.
Seeing the unseen or seeing what others already do, can be a real gift. Nice pacing on this one.
New eyes and fresh perspectives; sign me up. I am always ready to open my eyes even further. I like the thought of souls walking among us.
Really like the flow to this piece, depth & breadth of meaning..especially enjoyed 'spill rainbows down chins' '...pursuing ourselves senseless' and the two final stanzas complete a circle, there is an effortless inner line to this..very cool
I love that we are "pallets of color"
Hugs
SueAnn
So much going on around us and we don't always see it...another awesome write. Loved the line 'this is the essence, we are palletes of color' ~ love the imagery...
from the first line through the last, this is a fascinating visual and spiritual journey through your words, Brian. finishing with the repetition of the first, most powerful verse elevates the entire poem another level. any higher and you'll be in the stratosphere. brilliant, smart, meaningful! one of my favorites!
thanks for the great prompt, too. ♥
Just brilliant! "Brian, teach me to write" is my request.
I love that the blind man can "see".
Love that.
I like
there's always a little light in the pitch
or vice versa, spider web cracks stitched
interstate maps to inner states and open
mouths are WMDs whistling before they
explode or spill rainbows down chins
though I visualize a technicolor yawn.
"I've got one that can see!"
They Live is one of the coolest movies ever. Stay asleep! Obey!
holy... loving this blind man sandwich...
I liked the play with words: see saw souls, inner states, ...
and a great prompt you provided!
Get a load of that opening stanza!! The thoughts just run from there. Very good indeed.
How you manage to fit Rowdy Roddy Piper in a poem that still packs great meaning is beyond me, lol (and he was my favorite when I was a kid).
Even when I was little, all I could think about was the significance of the mud in that miracle. One could ponder that part alone for quite awhile. I will definitely re-read this one when I am more lucid. There are hints of deeper meaning hidden throughout, so I don't want to miss any of it :)
Nice write Brian - love the repeat of first stanza as ending..the range of life and souls and all being one..bkm
... This could cycle over and over in sixes is it a specific form?
Great intro and in Verse 4 is reality
somewhere. This is really deep.
Great call for the collective, always enjoy how you play those words. ~ Rose
the 'blind man with spit in his eye' see's real (what imagery!!)~ 'we are all in it together' ~ yep no escape ~ even we may delude ~ it's false ~ 'see saw' sees all' ~ great image too Brian ~ Have to get used to different days ~ remember Sunday but now it is saturday :) ~ Lib ~ Have a great week Brian
I sometimes get lost in your words and feel I miss so much. I have to read them again and then I find new little treasures.
"healed and the
first thing he sees...people."
A wonderful write...your word play is spot on & the depth of this is fabulous. I dig what you convey regarding what we fail to see within our world.
"A blind man, eyes packed with spit
made mud and sent, out the city,
everything familiar, healed and the
first thing he sees---people..."
Hi! Brian,
Once again, your words are very powerful, and very thought-provoking too!
"there is no independence, we are in this and together---when a light winks or dims,when a shadow lightens or deepens, we know,our bones more attune then our senses,yet we pursuing ourselves senseless..."
I must say that no truer were ever spoken...Thanks, for sharing!
deedee ;-D
Brian well written. Blind mind, spit and souls....makes me think of my savior. :-)
Yes, we knew it in our bones, more surely than through other means. Great way to draw us into a more complex existence...and the 'They Live' reference was killer!
You must have received not only your share of creativity, but a few other peoples share as well, Brian. Amazing.
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