Tuesday, August 2, 2011

OpenLinkNight: Watching movies with a blind man

without previews or greasy popcorn finger prints,
lights dim & the movie begins

clickclickclickclick
clickclickclick

projector spins 8 mm film
reel to real, acting more like a 9
on the frontal lobe brain pan of my mind
emptying a full clip one hot slug at a time

[POW] a white lie told to save my hide
as maggots turn thru the meat inside

[POW]silence when, words should have spilt
never place a bet on the failure of truth

[POW] cheating, a test, check or spouse, either
a moment of pleasure, spent, at what cost

clickclickclickclick
clickclickclick

empty, but twitchy trigger finger keeps pulling
long after, they rewind and replay to remind me
daily, i am lower than tread dogShit on a shoe,
unworthy of all this,"look at this fool, he's helpless"
like MS3000, commentators shadows said
then laughed as they cap me again on my re-birth
day death bed, it's all mental so no witness, available
for the witless, to testify and cause a mess

i need a witness
need a witness
can i get a witness

soft at first, bagpipes moan the opening notes
hot licks, a chorded axe joins as a punk bends its throat
amazing grace crawls into the mosh pit, at least
that's how i hear it, oh hell yes, damn---how sweet
the sound to drown out the images and voices
of my past choices, not re-wound, jis this-
life un-bound

now, in your most guttural howl let me hear you sing---

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound...

OpenLinkNight - Belly up and bring it poetic. d'Verse Poets Pub opens at 3 pm EST. Now go, write, come join us. Hosted  tonight by the ever lovely Joy Ann Jones, better know for her versical spells as Hedgewitch.

also linking with Imperfect Prose

110 comments:

Daniel said...

O.K., this one is kinda raw and emotional and demanding of attention. Great way to start my day brother.

Natasha said...

Where do you come up with these ideas you seem to spin so easily!? The title alone, forced me to put an end to my twitter assault to read...and as always...it's some kind of wonderful! ;) Almost in a grand funk kind of way. Wonder if I'll make it to first comment...Back to work now poet, but there are volumes waiting to be written on this one.

Heaven said...

those are some raw and gritty images of life you showed whilst watching a movie;

but hope is flickering at the end when you sing that song...

yes, i am singing later ~

Pat Hatt said...

blah the maggot line gave me chills
Might have to pop some pills
No previews either you say
Just the movie straight away
Guttural howl just topped it off
Hard hitting in a I'm going to drown you in a trough....Kinda way

Eva Gallant said...

You mind is a treasure trove of riches!

Captain Dumbass said...

[POW]

Brian Miller said...

the soundtrack for this one should be fairly easy to figure...but it is the Flatfoot 56 version of AG...a little more punk style...

Valerie said...

There's some unprocessed images there, emotion too. Makes for several more reads. Notice is up' do not disturb'...

Patricia said...

Brien...
deeply moving...that's why they call it Amazing...that's why it's called grace...we never deserve it. Even though the voice of truth convicts in that silencte to rightside us... it never continues to condemn. Those other voices are not his. You only need One witness. Really gut wrenching write. Been there.

Daydreamertoo said...

It sounds as if you or the person you are writing for is going through a whole bucket load of mixed emotions. Guilt, admission, lies. You are cranky and yet, subdued, mellow.
Life truly is, an amazing grace however we are feeling at the time.
another great write and, enjoyable read from you Brian.

Josh Hoyt said...

I love the "pow" it cements the image and really makes it stand out. Great job.

Heather said...

so much here. a lot to think about...past choices...amazing grace....good luck with your pub, tonight! :)

Lolamouse said...

Brian,
I love how you weave music into your poems. And urban life. And raw, gritty emotion. Maybe I should just say that love your poetry!

TALON said...

This is a heartbreaker, Brian.

oceangirl said...

hello brian, nothing is coming out of this tap tonight:(

a blind man can watch a movie with you brian and he'll probably see more than the seeing.

Patricia said...

p.s. I forgot to tell you that I could totally hear Bono singing this one. Do you have any connections to his producer? =)

tracy said...

"oh hell yes, damn---how sweet"

Could not have said it better myself!

California Girl said...

This went in a completely different direction from whence it began. Powerful words.

Magpie said...

Very powerful.
"how sweet
the sound to drown out the images and voices
of my past choices, not re-wound, jis this-
life un-bound"

Jill from Killeny Glen said...

This one is so deep and contains SO MUCH pain...you really captured it...

Sue said...

Absolutely love this one, Brian.

=)

JStar said...

This was POW, raw and in your face...

Linda said...

I find the reel begins playing the real when I'm trying to go to sleep at night. Over and over it runs, filled with all the things that make me squirm. But grace...
This was, as others have said, raw Brian - but so real.

AmyLK said...

i like this one. I had to read it many times to get it. Very nice write!

Myrna R. said...

Read this one a few times. Sad, left me wondering... about life, and how we muffle and hide our deepest truths sometimes.

Anyway, what I don't like about being away is that I miss out on your writing. Today I went back and read about four days worth of your talent. Didn't comment because I think you know what I'd say.

Brian Miller said...

i hear you linda...and this is really about that...the movies we play again and again in our minds...and spent time thinking and worrying about what we could have done different...slavery to our past mistakes...

Mark Kerstetter said...

Your poem is bloody with the sense that sometimes (hell, probably most of the time) there is no witness - none other than ourselves, and we have to accept grace wherever we can find it.

hedgewitch said...

Man, you are bringing it in this one. You've got subtle goodies in there for us word freaks(-reel to real-)and action, scathing rhetoric, self-assessment that's almost a castigation, followed by the bath in pure grace. Good stuff to serve up, indeed. I don't think I'll find too many better brews behind the bar tonight. ;_)

WINDOWLAD said...

..ha, the title was so intriguing and took me a lot of patience to figure it out Mr...hehe.. you're getting wittier and wittier each time i read you here.. ye know i couldn't just pick some lines to represent my side co'z if i did that i would have rather pick 'em all co'z every single line you weaved here's totally amusing, honestly.. you're exceptional! plus you've included here one of my fave songs of all time...yes that 'Amazing Grace'.. now i'm singing over here.. totally awake and sleepless co'z it's openlink night Tuesday... ('tis actually openlink dawn wednesday here..hehe.. co'z it's nearly 3 am here..) ah.. gotta get some coffee.. (@____@)..

~Kelvin

Joseph Hesch said...

Will it really be this way, Brian? I mean I get closer to the end every day and I've been an altarboy all my life, but I run on guilt and if I have to go through what you describe here, I might as well just jump in the abyss without the spin and click.

Man, I hope I understood this as you meant it. Powerful words and images, pal.

Shopgirl said...

I like the rich sense of sound and mood you draw out with so few words. The stanza about bagpipes was wonderful and stood out more than the others:

"soft at first, bagpipes moan the opening notes
hot licks, a chorded axe joins as a punk bends its throat
amazing grace crawls into the mosh pit, at least
that's how i hear it, oh hell yes, damn---how sweet..."

Timoteo said...

Amazing stuff...infused with a gritty kind of grace. Now Marvin Gaye's Can I Get A Witness is stuck in my head...someday my parody version of that will be called: Can I Get A Wet Nurse!

Kavita said...

One close look at life with eyes wide shut - and the perspective is quite a stunning one... no?

Superbly expressed here, Brian! Loved the play at sounds... totally added depth to the poem..

chromapoesy.com said...

emptying a full clip one hot slug at a time

[POW] a white lie told to save my hide
as maggots turn thru the meat inside

[POW]silence when, words should have spilt
never place a bet on the failure of truth

[POW] cheating, a test, check or spouse, either
a moment of pleasure, spent, at what cost

This is my favorite piece by you (I know that says more about me than you but you really grabbed and kept my attention with this one). That movie is a specious, pernicious monster. It takes grace to defeat it. Excellent work!

theborgpoet said...

Reminds me of a summer day in '88 when I was on the streets. Not sure why, but it does!

Randy Behavior said...

I'm sure the blind is a hint, but I don't know what movie this is. The whole thing has a Pulp Fiction vibe.

Joanne Elliott said...

I like how it keeps rolling faster and faster to the end...and the guttural Amazing Grace I hear it now. My step son is a Death Metal guitarist and vocalist so I do hear it.

haikulovesongs said...

[EYES WIIIIIDE OPEN] just put on my headset & listened to Flatfoot 56's version of AG ~ don't think i'll be needing that coffee to wake up now.

i love every line...every little word-twist ~ especially:

"i am lower than tread dogShit"

that's pretty f***ing low, Brian! and i know that feeling!

it must be amazing to be inside your brain. as always, your poem is brilliant!!

jackie dick said...

Dang! Is this what a sinus attack in your own brain pan wrought? Maggots! *gag* But Brilliant! Another Brian assault on the senses. But Brilliant! Oh, I said that already. Original, imagry that will remain with me until I fall asleep; if I sleep. Excelsior!

Ed Pilolla said...

i need grace for all of my choices for sure. this one read like a good and loud fireworks show.

Tom Eliot said...

Yeah Baby! I m firing my Ak47 into the night sky here in sunny Kent.

This was a blast from start to finish... total boom... 'Av It!' as we say here just before Kicking off!

I LOVED THIS WRITE
POP! POP! POP! PO!P POP!

mairmusic said...

Wow-- best the beats! V.cool string of consciousness images. http://mairmusic.wordpress.com/2011/07/29/week-146-it-digs-in-so-deeply-so-far/

Monkey Man said...

There is powerful guilt behind this post.

C Rose said...

It is really as if every week I sit in love with your words Brian! This imagery is amazing that you delivered with power. It feels of the mind's chaos looping in vain. Thanks for always being an inspiration to me, your words mean a great deal. ~ Rose

Lady Nyo said...

Brian, there is a whole lotta stuff going on in this poem...I have to read it several times..made one pass but it needs more...and I don't want to cheat and read the comments...I want to feel the full weight out on that limb before I fall.

Later, gater....but it is emotion packed as would I expect from you.

You have such an individual voice.

Lady Nyo

Katherine said...

Well what can I say that has not already been said about this fantastic write Mr Brian, it is amazingly powerful. You're the man! I love how you're minds eye see the surrounding world. Have a great day :)

Baino said...

Are you saying that finding religion saved you/him from being a wretch? I never liked that line in Amazing Grace. Nice piece because it's raw frankly. Remember, people who don't make mistakes, don't make anything

Louise said...

A powerful, emotional write Mr M...I had to reread a few times. I guess we can only do the best we can with the choices we make..trust our inner instinct (not always easy)..you got me thinking..

Fred said...

Absolutely mesmerizing. had to read a couple times. Love the Can I get a witness in here, kind of out of nowhere and refreshes the mental palette, the ending, well I love the guttural call out there, great way to end the piece. Just a pretty much, in my opinion, perfect piece, thanks I needed that

waysidewordgarden said...

wow, amazing write. so thankful for grace!

anointedruins said...

Love the reference to MST3K -- outrageous to think of Tom Servo and Crow making wisecracks as the story of your life plays out on the Big Screen of final judgment. Thankful for the hopeful note at end -- the Advocate secures your acquittal.

David

blueviolet said...

There's a lot of grit, hurt, and pain in life's choices. Hopefully we can move beyond them.

Glynn said...

A stream-of-consciousness, cinema verite kind of poem -- one rocking ride.

Claudia said...

yep i sing, i sing...how could i ever stop as these movies would make me unable to move or laugh or love again. tight, real and.. an excellent closure..smiles

lori said...

(gulp) this just gets right at it. Wow. When you write like this, I don't even know what to say... I felt this in my gut. Crazy good, Brian.

Today is my 14th wedding anniversary, and I've been thinking a lot about the grace involved in marriage. It's all about extending and accepting grace from one another, so I'll sing it loud and proud with you because really, there is no other way.

I'll be a little late to the d'Verse party this week. I'm sure you understand I might not be on the computer a lot tonight :)
Excellent, as always!

liv2write2day said...

An onomatopoeic masterpiece. I like how you focus on the sense of hearing in juxtaposition to the "blindness" in the title.

Laurie Kolp said...

Wow! Powerful and lasting...

"laughed as they cap me again on my re-birth
day death bed,"

I get the sense of someone having been to hell and surviving then turning their life around. The song at the end is perfect... one of my all-time favs!

BKP said...

Your last stanza was really the meat of this; it was an entire brass ensemble with Flutes and a single bashing Tuba until the orchestra rang it all in. Mosh to the Amazing Grace. Wonderful.

-Pounds

ayala said...

raw...emotional and great.

anglachel27 said...

Quite the assault, I felt like I had to put a hand up to ward off the blows. Very nice work!

Life in a Poem said...

great writing i guess we wrote along the same lines. it's amazing how writing gets us through what we are going through :)

Helena White said...

Wow! Brian...truly amazing!

"Facing the truth is so much easier then all the wasted time and guilt it takes to hide from it by re-writing it in our minds eye"

Betsy said...

Oh gosh, yes...we really can haunt ourselves, can't we? Sometimes it's so hard to forgive ourselves and look forward.

Cynthia said...

BRAVO! Bold and On point.

KB and Whitesnake said...

Love it!

KB

mrs mediocrity said...

fabulous, powerful, and now, somewhere in the distance, i hear bagpipes...

L ♑ said...

oh wow, way to turn emotions inside out like an umbrella that drips experiences... Loved it.

happygirl said...

Pow! maggots in my brain cause me pain and OUCH, this one speaks of lies and tries to remind me of the damage they can cause.

Stranger said...

Blind to the present or surrounded by those only able to see the narrator's past. Hardcore stuff.

Reflections said...

Powerful 'amazing' stuff in this one! Love the depth, raw emotion... I imagined myself blind listening to your cues. Wow!

yellowhousecafe said...

Lots of layers and snippets of scenes from movies I love that have caused major impact. Dig the reel sound, brought it to life...love the change of rhythm as well. Now, I just wonder which movie triggered this poetry scene ~

sharplittlepencil said...

Good God, man, this is brilliant. I remember hearing a punk version of Danny Boy: THE PIPES THE PIPES THE PIPES THE PIPES.

Inside anyone's mind is a mystery. Unending twists, labyrinth of horrors they understand but you cannot. This is the 8mm version of Eraserhead... the whole click click device, 'like a 9," great, Brian.
Hope you can use a laugh... Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/08/02/outstanding-what-sun-scribblings/

Margie said...

*Amazing grace, how sweet the sound.*
Loved how you ended this one!

Amazing write, Brian.

adeeyoyo said...

I think you're watching the movie in your head,Brian, s-l-o-w-l-y. Maybe over and over again? Wanting forgiveness... for lies, cheating...

Tara Miller said...

POW! I'm sure these words hit home with everyone that reads you today. I think it's just in our human nature to look back on our lives and past choices we've made (that may not have been the best)beating ourselves up or not being able to move forward due to dwelling on it. Easier said than done but a giant step forward toward growth in our lives would be to learn from our past, make changes and move forward.

Sheila Moore said...

spinning words, wheels, and minds. nice work as always, Bri. - can't believe Natasha stopped tweeting long enough to read this - can't say I blame her though (smiles)

Celestial Dreamz said...

oh an emotional piece ... you do have a unique story telling ability through poetry ... and your ideas behind them are always so different. :-) all the best.

Jyoti Mishra said...

The title was so fascinating that I couldn't stop myself reading it till the end...
awesome read !!
u r a fantastic story teller.

Jinksy said...

Some movie you played out there...

James Rainsford said...

An intensely compressed and intriguing poem. The imagery is arresting and original. Much to ponder here.

Carys said...

Great mix of shorter lines with what reads like prose/poetry in some sections. The longer sections have real pace and hit you one thought after another, the shorter sections giving the reader breathing space to digest. Very clever write my friend. This bit is aces

a chorded axe joins as a punk bends its throat
amazing grace crawls into the mosh pit, at least
that's how i hear it, oh hell yes, damn---how sweet
the sound

tony said...

I remember an 8mm projector we had when i was young.Sometimes it got stuck & the film started to Burn (on Screen!Psychedelic -effects!) Raw+Vivid like this prose.Bravo!

annell said...

You never cease to amaze!

Lorraine said...

so intense an assault on all my senses

Ann Grenier said...

I'm keeping a low profile back here, but cheering loudly in a whisper...YES!

Help! Mama Remote... said...

Omygosh that was sweet. I can hear some beats bumping behind this Brian!

Evelyn said...

this is f*cking brilliant.

Kristi said...

This is one of the reasons I love to read others work. So raw, complicated, and foreign to what I write. I loved it!!!
Favorite part is where you call for a witness. Don't we as humans crave that connection..that need to be seen?
You made me think!

drybottomgirl said...

Your diversity amazes me! Well done my friend...

j. littlejohn said...

fantastic

nsiyer said...

Brian, you amaze me with your out of the box thinking.

John (@bookdreamer) said...

Interesting raw use of words here. The title and its theme reminded me of Cathedral by Raymond Carver

Belinda said...

Brian, you capture so many feelings that I've had at different times. These POWs you list are so much a part of what's become ingrained in our society. And how you end this is perfect.

Lisa notes... said...

I feel like I'm cheating myself by just reading these words. They need to be spoken and heard aloud. Powerful stuff on many levels.

Cathy said...

Raw and insistent and what a trip, what a trip. You have a marvelous way of drawing the reader in, under and away...

Aida Bode said...

"never place a bet on the failure of truth" - No, I'll just wash my hands and "dry" them on the crowd. It's a bit Pilaty of me, but hey, why bet ;)
This is a mind blowing poem. clickclickclick

Amanda Moore (iblogmoore) said...

I have to admit I was glued to my seat reading this! Can I get a witness!

thoughtsofapatcheduptraveler said...

Amazing grace crawls into the mosh pit? Shall we talk grit? This is fabulous, you had me locked to the words line to line. Can I get a witness? Excellent!

Beth

Rachel said...

Raw. Stunning. Gritty and powerful.

You, brother, are an artist. And a soul-toucher.

Cindy said...

What images this evokes! And in it all...Amazing Grace, but not sung by a perfect pitched choir, but the type of sounds those who KNOW they are broken flock to...

Blessings!

Goofball said...

sorry you lost me in this one, didn't quite get the story you wanted to bring, I'm afraid

RMP said...

the reel never seems to stop. not only do shots seem to repeat...the bullet clips reload almost daily.

a very interesting piece especially when I picture "amazing grace crawls into the mosh pit."

Ostensible Truth said...

loving the experimental feel with the [POW]'s - powerful - raw and intense - grit - you got lots goig on here! cheers! great read!

Jen said...

I heard these words coursing through my head, the pows hitting in the gut over and over again. Brilliant.

emily wierenga said...

sigh. i love that you ended with amazing grace. such a soft landing...

Olivia said...

Totally blown away Brian!!!
Very very deep words..... completely taken aback!!

Many Hugs xox

Other Mary said...

Isn't it amazing...this grace thing...and yet if we were deserving it wouldn't be grace. Powerful one, my friend.

evavonpelt said...

Wow...POW!! Love the textures, sounds, and rawness of this piece!!!

evavonpelt said...

POW! Love the textures, sounds, and rawness in this piece!

Syd said...

Even the blind can see though...