Monday, May 9, 2011
magpie tales: punk monk
mohawk erect, i sit
on the split log bench
by the grape arbor
seeking solace on bent
elbows, fingers tracing
wood grain, searching
for answers in the whirls
of tree ages
marks of storms and creepy
crawly invaders among the sun
god's benevolence baked in
and through it all stood tall,
arms raised, despite, until laid
low to create this space
green buds & leaf adorn the vine
dry limbs, trimmed one at a
time by hand, last week
lay for the burning, but again
new life has come, trumpeted by
the song of wing
soon enough new fruit will
feed, for those unwilling
to be content only to touch,
without strength to bring
to lip & ingest, this is a
sluggard's gambit.
in habit, breathing, i toe
the regimented red brick row
back to the house no longer
alone among the sown garden
of my thoughts.
This is a Magpie Tale.
And Today, Gay Cannon does a great job explaining the intricacy of rhyme at One Stop Poetry.
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79 comments:
A self portrait in words....wonderfully done man :)
absolutely loved this. every word.
When are you publishing a book?
Love...well done. Kori xoxo
Damn to you I tip my cup
But I saw the rhyme theme and attempt to show you up
Words surround you so well
Also so profound I must tell
Wow once more
As you amaze at your shore
You spirited me away to another time, another place another way of living.
Bravo Brian. What a delicious concoction you've served today with true rhymes, assonance and consonance running through your metaphor linking tree trunk lines, garden path bricks and the lines in our hands and the trails of insects telling of destiny and change.
Beautifuland spiritual. Such a wonderful description. I love how poetry just flows from your nature.
The magpie image portrayed very well :)
Absolutely beautiful,loved this. So nicely done!
Perfect, as always.
Hey this sounds like someone I know. But, I guess that's the point. (Smiles)
i totally agree with Duane, when are we going to be able to have a book of all of your amazing words...! have a great one! xo
"the sown garden of my thoughts"...love that....nicely done :)
What can I say except: I envy you your ability.
Its not so lonely out there or within once we realize that we do have company in one form or another....
very lingering this one is..
I envy your ability also! And wonder how you can be so inspired so often, so deeply.
No longer alone with the sewn garden of your thoughts... lovely!
You never cease to impress, Sir Brian. Loved the language you used with this piece, and to read aloud...spectacular! Congratulations...you were my office share for the day! (keeps me out of trouble if I can get the boss man to appreciate too!) We've added another fan to your lengthy list..Rock on, poet!
how do you do that..? the words seem just to tumble around you and fall willingly into the perfect place..this was excellent brian. what probably spoke most to me was the seeking solace on bent elbows...love the image and makes me aware of my own need for solace..
This is really beautiful and peaceful my love. I can see you sitting on our bench above squiggy taking in everything around you. I also see a deeper layer of meaning in this poem that we can all relate to.
A MASTERPIECE, WELL DONE MATE :)
Standing O!! Great. One of my favs in a while. Your poem took over during the time of read. Inspiring.
'Mohawk erect'......that's a bloody good start! You fab-wordy man you! I loved this, Brian.
Great job on the imagery and similitude between the different entities that reside. Very interesting causing deep thought.
The contemplative life is a hard row to hoe, my friend, but you've caught a lot of the flavor of what makes it so attractive here. Esp. like the audio-visual of " trumpeted by song of wing..."
Wonderful poem - it just suits the photograph so well.
So, I'm guessing you found your solace. Who wouldn't...when you're able to see the world as you do.
Great job!
The imagery in your words brings a feeling of wistfulness and a wonderful place to escape to.
Anita.
the drunk punk monk sunk
to a funk when the slunk stunk
skunk bunked by junk trunk
...
Sorry, couldn't help it. Rhyme day and all. :D
Loved your poem. Favorite part is the first stanza, since it's such a clear picture in my mind. Excellent!
Clapping-hands delightful Brian, I love it!
This is so good Brian...if only we COULD find answers in the whirls of tree ages...((sigh))
Amazing, what some time spent in contemplation in a garden will do for you.
your words are like staccato music to my ears. such a fresh narrative.
My goodness, you are an amazing poet!
loved this!
Breathtaking piece. No other words for it.
This is beautiful. I was right there with you and could see every little detail.
I like where you took this. The monk stumped me.
Anyone who looks for answers in the whorls of wood ranks tops in my book. Well constructed piece from start to finish!
Another excellent piece, Brian. I really like your versatility...some of your work is raw emotion and some, like this, is lyrical. Vb
As as always. well done. i like it alot.
That last line is fabulous!
I bet this one was tricky for you, as you are the master of free-verse. Like the journey you take us on while you trim the vines though. I love spring yard work and getting my hands dirty in leaf buds, creepy crawlies and plain old dirt. Sounds like enough for a bonfire afterwards too. Sweet!
"a sluggard's gambit", indeed.
Not in your writing, friend Brian.
I love each and every line, am astounded by your creativity, and totally jealous of it at the same time. Great writing, Brian.
Brian you are a master !!
JL&B
interesting contrasts
thoughtful punk
burning timber
and baked red brick
Taking inspiration from the beauty of nature around you and relating to a lovely garden, when you think about yourself and your mind.
Lovely and so speaking to my own sentiments.;)
Have a great day dear Brian,
xoxo
I call this Spring, Brian and you've captured it beautifully!
Sandi
that was great brian. i liked the tree trunk lines. i have traced my fingers on many a tree trunk, wishing for it's wisdom.
I love this so much, I have no words......
I love the way you describe the process of renewal..very well done!
Very well done. Absolutely love the title.
I'm glad things continue to grow and evolve. :)
love the imagery. wonderful poem
No longer alone among the sown garden. Love the garden and the wood.
I like this, Brian. It gave me an immense feeling of peace reading it. Very nice. :-)
I like the links in imagery between the man and the garden. The whole has a feel of ancient tradition, told in a modern voice.
meditative and peaceful- love this poem.
A great piece, Brian, it was almost musical in it's rhythm - wonderful.
You orchestrate absolutely wonderful pieces. This one is no exception! ~ Rose
My favorite part? "sluggard's gambit"
An incredible piece of work, sir.
The mark of a real poet is that
they reek of poetics regardless
of the setting; the simplest moment
blossoms into a macrocosm of
metaphysical dimension, as
witnessed in your writing.
It is an honor to write beside
you in this willow flock.
I loved the ending!
Man, this is so well woven.. very well written.. :D
Very deep.
You and another poet that I follow are similar in that you both boggle my mind :)
*thank you for the visit*
Hi! Brian...
Words that come to my mind: Reflection,prayer,and seeking solace (or solitude).
Thanks, for sharing your words and thoughts too!
DeeDee ;-D
So absolutely beautiful.
This is so pleasing to me. I AM a gardener first, writer second, so the imagery and allusion all make perfect sense. I often think the act of gardening is, for me, a moving meditation, not unlike a yogi's practice or labyrinth walker's task.
http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/05/09/courage-in-my-cup/
"...searching
for answers in the whirls
of tree ages..." Wonderful.
A work of art. Bravo!
Anna :o]
I'm with Duane Scott. . .where's the book, man?
And Mohawk to me says tomahawk... Not quite the spirit of St Francis...
Great piece!
"no longer
alone among the sown garden
of my thoughts" is a wonderful line!
Thank you for your visit the other day. Your kind words are much appreciated.
I can see you sitting on the log
Well, I liked the 'song of wing'. I am quite sure that perfect little phrase will stay with me.
And that is all I shall write, for your 71st comment :)
Dear Brian: A very lovely texture to this poem; tactile and meditative. Excellent imagery!
There's something so melancholy about this. Wonderful imagery honoring the power of Spring.
this was powerful brian.
Excllent, distinctive. Great title.
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