She is the neighborhood terrorist
all smiles in a pretty dress
going door to door to spread
cheer & whatever gossip she
picks up on her route
did you know...
can you believe...
why, i heard...
her word balloons line the cul-de-sacs
like landmines & she leaves
hand grenades for kids to
play catch with, so full
of hot air and righteousness
she just floats along on her sortie
Lord bless their souls is always her
opening salvo as she drops bunker
busters to root out those nasty sinners,
weeds among the garden of Eden, it's
all the Lord's work you know
of course she also votes Republican,
like a good Christian, cause save the
babies but leave my assault rifles alone
makes perfect sense against the sixth
commandment,
brings brussel sprouts
to the Sunday potluck and hides the
black label when the preacher stops
by to gather the intel on his flock
Lord, bless their souls.
The image is courtesy of Lauren who is being featured at One Shoot Sunday today.
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97 comments:
terrorists, nazis , they need prayers, God Help their tiny weeny soul
super writing as always
The irony in so much of what you just wrote is mind boggling. "Lord bless their souls is always her opening salvo" —can told totally picture this, complete with sound bite. Nice!
The brussels sprouts--chillingly humble signifier...
I think we all know somebody like this...But only you could paint the picture so perfectly.
Adding this one to my growing list of favs.
-C
Wow, you really did have fun with this one...a terrorist? really? Thsi is another beauty from a freedom fighter imagination!
Closer to first
With my little burst
Anyway I didn't truly notice all the image you used
Until I read completley the new post you fused
Makes it that much more effective and such
When I noticed she was off the ground a bit much
Blame it on the early rise
Or having to come to work on a Sunday through flies
But yes you are once again totally correct
I'm sure your ego such went more erect..LOL
ha. pray for us all-it's a short drop off the front porch into hell
Hi! Brian...
Top Of the Sunday morning to you and your readers...Hmmm...It appears as if things are not always what they appear to be...Do I "smell" the word...Dare I say it...hypocrisy!
[Postscript: I was thinking what a very colourful, lovely, picture...until I read your post. I thought that your post was going to focus on welcoming spring-time!]
Thanks, for sharing!
DeeDee ;-D
funny. thanks Brian
Excellent. The contrast drawn is splendid stuff.
With every passing day, as I am moving farther and farther away from my teenage naiveté, I am can see clearer the gap between what people try and make you believe they are and what they really are.
it was a wonderful read.
good job Brian, terorists are fragile in faith.
.
to know the cause of my absence , welcome to my blog
This is great , Brian. Love it .... Happy Sunday :)
Wow, you have captured that character perfectly!
I bet she has big hair, too.
Good one, Brian.
Oh, yes, I know this woman ... and her brothers and sisters. Will done, Brian.
Too many people just like this. We have all been sucker punched and don't even know it.
This must be the lady that came to visit at your home this afternoon. A neighbor probably.
This chick lives on my route. She is forever messing around with her yard and stuff so she can snag any poor passerby or neighbor and pump them for gossip to spread. One day I was wearing rainbow earrings, and she felt obliged to tell me she can't "condone" that. She must have mistaken me for someone who gives a rat's behind what she can condone.
I think we all know this type all too well. Nicely done.
Black label, eh? I figured she'd drink tea...Scary "lady" indeed.
You have created a perfect image!
Oh yes, you have her pegged to a tee. (I have encountered the occasional him of this stripe, btw) She dropped by here last week.
"...save the babies but leave my assault rifles alone..."
"God bless their souls ... but don't expect me to pay an extra penny in taxes to make sure they get the health care they need - don't bless their souls THAT much."
Oh, she's a terrorist all right! Filled with all kinds of scary images, this one! Thanks for giving me another way to look at her...
word balloons...this piece is so very true...we all have "one" terrorist like this in our worlds...prayer indeed;)
Well described.
Great poem. Growing up my best friend's mom was this woman. I don't think she liked me very much back then. If only she could see me today. :D
perfect description..of people I avoid...and I personally love brussel sprouts and the Lord...but prefer serving myself mainly because of this woman and her likes...agree with the favs...one of them for sure...bkm
You must have met my neighbors? Ha ha Just kidding. Great job, as usual, Brian! I hope you're enjoying your weekend.
I wish I could have your attitude.
We have one across the street.
Church every Sunday, teaches kindergarten, and toad and lizards come out of her mouth.
wow! you really nailed this one, Brian! i absolutely love your take on the photograph!
"Lord, bless their souls."
{smile} d
Well bless your heart! You hit the nail on the head with this one. Love it!
Are you spying on my neighbor now!? OMG...I laughed, and am still smirking. I really do believe you have paid a visit to my cul-de-sac, where this same neighbor, took it upon herself to let my daughter know, when she was SEVEN, that Santa Clause didn't exist, and that she should forsake her gifts in honor of Jesus, BTW, did I tell you I'm moving :)
Well done. There are more of these folks than ever these days...
The self righteous are always the best example of how we all should live...at least in their own minds. And their minds are too closed to see otherwise.
Lord protect me from your flock...
and their lime jello salad
I've often wondered what its like to preach and preach about freedom then feel totally fine with denying it to anyone who shows just a tiny bit of difference. We must paper over with our rants and pamphlets of made up stuff the barest possibility that someone thinks a different thought because god told us--not them--the word. Sad, and spot on brian.
LOL! Love it. Don't we all know someone like her?
I think I can guess the rest. All in the name of the Lord, ah!
Wow! Great irony! Held it strong throughout the piece. love the stanza...
Lord bless their souls is always her
opening salvo as she drops bunker
busters to root out those nasty sinners,
weeds among the garden of Eden, it's
all the Lord's work you know
Fabulous as always my friend.
Her day will come. It's unavoidable.
alice...yeah that is kinda the point...we are not all that different are we...
Easily disarmed with a deaf ear.
I better watch out for her, knocking my door, with gossip
How have you made this bright writing -so true- after this image i just get amazed...
The neighbor from Hell. I believe you have described a completely different branch of the human species. Maybe those Neanderthals didn't all die out.
This line, amid all the great lines, stands out for me as inspired:
'her word balloons line the cul-de-sacs /like landmines'...
No holds barred in this cutting portrait.
lol wow a delightful treat.brussel sprouts,nazis...take me to your leader.this is other worldly.great write.
Wow, cutting commentary masterfully written, amazing job!
I don't think she looks so pretty as in your picture ;)
don't you like brussels sprouts by the way?
Certainly one of your best-- terrific satire. I'd like to see you post this somehow on Huffington Post blog to catch a wider audience's eye-- very strong, unified; this is a poem that knows what it has to say. Amen. xxj
Great post title to get our attention. Landmines, hand grenades, brussel sprouts. What a combinaton.
Bless her heart..we know her so well in the South, the hypocrite who gives Christians a bad name. She will quote chapter and verse, even the "Judge not" one as she continues to destroy Susannah along with the Elders. Yes, I know her well.
Truly truthful writing. Loved our little gossip-monger. Very lyrical and ironic. Will be back for more.
Yeah this is fantastic right down to the brussels sprouts. wouldn't change one of line of this perfect poem.
joanny
There's one (or two, or three) in every neighborhood. You captured their righteousness perfectly.
Happy Sunday, jj
Thankfully I don't know too many gossips, but the few that I have known along the way, well, let me tell you ...
so afraid of going to hell, she has no idea she is already there. the devil does work in mysterious ways.
...love, love, love this!! oh the hypocrisy ~you've brilliantly addressed so much of it... welcome to the neighborhood, indeed!
A great poem! Perfect capture!
We all have one of these in our neighbourhoods.....described her perfectly my friend.....:-)Hugs
I am always amazed at your ability to grasp and grapple and capture so curtly. How long have you been writing poetry? and are you published anywhere besides online?
ha ha, this is great...yes, we all know someone like this...it works so well with the photo, too! xo
Biting and fabulous. I know someone like that, avoid he like the plague.
Good one;
there are quite a few terrorists like this one; best avoided. when you see her coming, best cross the road.
oh how I cant stand gossipers!
really dig what you came up with for this... cool to see all the different directions you can take from a single photo.
Boy was that a trip. HOw you saw that in the photo was certainly a very creative turn.
Ahh, we all know a few of these terrorists...
Hmmm. I think I know this lady! (And several of her family members...)
;)
You described her so well! I just LOVE your analogies!
Well done. I was wondering where you were going with this based on the title, but you're right, she is a terrorist too. Thanks.
wouldn't you know ~ that kindly neighbour was'nt really all that she claimed ~ loved the analogies Brian ~ to terrorist ~ won't leave alone ~ your typical nosy one ~ wolf in sheeps clothing or rather sparly shoes ~ have to keep my eye out ~ brill ~ Lib ~ @libithina
The neighborhood gossip quick to judge, but does no wrong in her eyes (did I get this right?) if so, dangerous combo... who'd want to be judged by someone like this. I'm not fond of this type of person and luckily don't know any.
Your run of the mill hypocritical desperate housewife. Yup...we gots LOTS of 'em round here. Uh, but her skirts a lil short for doin' the "Lord's work."
Wow, this is so not who I thought this woman would be, and yet, there she is. It just goes to show that you never know about some people. :D Fabulous take on the photo.
Oh sure we all know her...but I bet if we did a little soul searching parts of her would look at us in the mirror...
oh excellent betsy! how true you know...we all know one but who knows us? caught up in our own beliefs and wanting to get ahead or just feel important we drop that little juicy bit to get one up on someone else...hmm....
Glad you enjoyed Lauren's work, Brian! It clearly inspired you - and quite nicely too...quite the character you've painted for us, and disturbingly one we all know I'm sure...unfortunately enough. How the world is smothered...terrorists indeed. How they preach, only and yet deny the rest of us the most basic freedoms...
An right-on indictment, Brian, of hypocrisy. I like the idea that she terrorizes through gossip, through her words. Great job of balancing commentary with a fine poetics!
I agree with Betsy - I think we've all "been there, done that" before and probably somehow felt justified by our "only trying to help" by talking about someone to others "for advice". Gossip is never good. What's in our heart that makes us do it? - Does it make US feel better to talk about someone else's problems in hopes of making ours seem not so bad? - Thanks love for the great visual you give us through these words.
Wow - a terrific interpretation of this photo!
I think there's one on every block...
I love your work more and more with each poem Brian. Thank you brotha.
Nathan.
Wow! That was outstanding. Loved it! You describe the kind of person I absolutely detest so beautifully!
Wow! That was outstanding. Loved it! You describe the kind of person I absolutely detest so beautifully!
One can't help but wonder. When did hatred and bigotry become the work of God?
nasty little busybody this one...
Sickly sweet - such a hypocrite! Nice one, Brian. :D
The little hypocrite... I know, 'cause we have one in our neighborhood.
So well done Brian!
Were your words prompted by the photo? How can your mind do such wonderful things? We all know those kind of people and it's all so true what you said, but how did you arrive at that from THAT picture. Awesome, Brian.
You skewered this one so keenly that I doubt the hordes of these terrorists even saw it coming.
White-washed sepulchers. All of 'em.
Chilling. Sharp. Excellent.
That moral highground they put themselves on is a trip. I don't meet too many people like her where I live but remember coming across her type when I knocked on doors for Kerry, Hillary and Obama in other states.
Love the word balloon land mindes! And...I think I know her - hope she won't run for pres!
Um, have you been spying on my cul-du-sac because I know exactly of whom you are speaking! Hehehe.
Ew, you're bringing back bad memories for me, Brian! We must know the same terrorist(s). Shivers with this one...bad shivers...
I do believe I've met her and many of her kinfolk.
I am glad to be a heathen Democrat.
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