Sunday, April 17, 2011

160/1SS - Cell Block Six


i am the sun
copulation of all
my Yesterdays

which try to contain
me but i refuse
to only see Today during
weekly visitation

watching my Tomorrows
grow up in pictures

What can you say in 160 characters? Say then go tell Monkey. The photo is by James Rainsford as part of One Shoot Sunday.

70 comments:

Fireblossom said...

The first verse eludes me but the ending is neat.

Cinner said...

Live just for today Brian, smiles.

Bonnie said...

Sounds like the painful lament of a non-custodial parent ... Those last two lines are all too common these days.

Ocean Girl said...

Watching my tomorrows grow up in pictures - that almost breaks my heart Brian.

Olivia said...

Very profound Brian.. need I say I loved it?
I enjoy reading such ones.. a very strong whimsical inspiration!!

yay!!
Sunday Hugs xxx

happygirl said...

The last verse does, indeed, tug at my heart. thanks Brian.

the walking man said...

The wrongs committed yesterday tend to eventually convict you. I can see the guy getting a new picture of his kids ever few months to watch as he spends his time considering all the people he has copulated in his non locked down past.

Hilary said...

A sad tale of imprisonment well told.

slommler said...

Isn't that like our lives? Watching our lives through a series of photos and short takes!!?? Are we present...today??
Hugs
SueAnn

dustus said...

"copulation of all
my Yesterdays"

Has a cryptic edge to it that makes me think you could be discussing a father or a son's POV; including further deep metaphysical speculation. Well written poetry.

ayala said...

smiles..Brian..live for today or should I say live every moment :-) Happy Sunday.

Claudia said...

think most of us have been in some kind of "prison" at some point of our lives - and yes - feels like that..

Eva Gallant said...

That last verse is so sad.

elisasspot said...

I like the union and acceptance of responsibility, coupled with hope and a moving forward.

Vicki Lane said...

Trapped by yesterday, watching tomorrow through the bars.

5thsister said...

I am continually amazed at how you can write, outside of your personal experience, in such personal and lyrical ways. I agree with all of the above.

Greyscale Territory said...

The cell that holds you in the moment is the false holy grail of yesterday! But if all you have in that time there are pictures of those close to you...living and growing...then indeed you are the sun keeping on track as an orbit should be! Intriguing!

Bandan said...

NI love how you mingled life with concepts of tomorrows and todays. Keep writing :)

And hopefully you will like this:


http://bitsbj.blogspot.com/2011/04/sametime-but-next-season.html

Leave a comment so that I know you've been there :)

Boom Boom Larew said...

May there always be tomorrows for all of us.

Glynn said...

The past desperately holds on as we embrace today "during weekly visistation." Good one, Brian.

Daniel said...

Is this one about someone you know?

Heather said...

this is sad...a person from their own imprisonment or the real thing? either way, i guess, they both speak sadness...i love the last line
enjoy your day.

David Allen Waters said...

the sins of the past...powerful emotion.

okoatokewa - the poet said...

"I am the sun"
Nice and captivating intro, another great poem from the guru, nice one.

trisha said...

beautiful brian. well said.

G-Man said...

The Sun does that sort of thing?

hedgewitch said...

Great first stanza, with its sense of solar hanky-panky and physics laying out your reality, and the visitation line anchors everything. I can't see which pic you chose though.

Rene/ Not The Rockefellers said...

i have to think about this one for a while...everytime i think i'm on the verge of understanding it escapes me

that's the sign of good work my friend

Lorraine said...

authentically written, future in photos

TechnoBabe said...

Sounds like someone is missing out and only gets to see pictures.

annell said...

Brian did you mean "sum" instead of "sun?" If we wait long enough we "grow old in pictures." Nicely done!

libithina said...

Loved it Brian ~ that refusal to give in ~ there is a strength in those words ~ Lib |~ @Libithina

TALON said...

So sad...

Lolamouse said...

Wondering about the title. I like it when a poem leaves me wondering.

Ami Mattison said...

I'm left wondering about the title as well...but the poem, especially the opening is so evocative. "Sun" makes me think there's a play on "son" here. And it seems indeed that this is the case, given the "tomorrows" growing up in pictures. Lovely line!

Lou Freshwater said...

This is beautiful. The form seems to translate the photo in a no words kind of way. Seize the day, zen, yes but your poem if felt not simply heard.

Tara Miller said...

To me, this is a sad poem of the price to be paid for making poor choices. It would break my heart to watch my Tomorrows grow up in pictures. I agree with Bonnie - these last two lines are too common nowadays.

You capture this well, love.

repressedsoul said...

Oh wow, extremely hard hitting this week Brian. Watching everything change the other side of those wrought iron bars. Between you and Adam I think I need a box of tissues every other week :)

Neva Flores said...

I am thinking this wonderful piece is about someone who only looks to tomorrow and can't see the sun today because of it.

Kerry O'Connor said...

Oh...just brilliant.
I'm so glad I didn't read yours before I wrote mine, because you have just struck me dumb.

Monkey Man said...

Love that opening line, B. Great lead to your just for today close. Thanks for being part of the Sunday 160.

Elaine said...

Tormented imprisoned soul. Very well written Brian. (btw, what's a 160?)

Sheila Moore said...

aw, this is sad. it sounds to me like someone in prison watching their kids grow up through weekly visits. so, sad - I'm sure some of the kiddos you work with go through this...

jen revved said...

i have to ask you this brian-- did you mean compilation-- just curious. But I like the mood you're evoking here and the idea of trapped light very much. xxxj

william said...

a very stirring piece mate, gather its about parents fighting for custody, well written, thanks for all your support daily, sorry I cannot come here daily, but I try to catch up with your work as it always fascinates me :)

Liza Ursu said...

eat it up sunshine,
humble pie of the past on plates of pictures.
if he can't, what makes him think the sun will?

CM said...

Sad. Regret. Yet persistance to not give up hope.

yellowhousecafe said...

simply brilliant...160 and all that...fabulous use of words to pull such meaning, amazing ~

Alice Audrey said...

a fornicating celestial body?

I like the imagery of tomorrows growing up in pictures.

laurenmichelleotheim said...

I love the last verse! It sounds so content. Not as if there is such a longing for tomorrow that today is discounted, just a happiness in the knowledge that tomorrow will come.

tracy said...

The poem is cool but I really love the photo, Brian! :-)

darsden said...

Not to much B... I am from the deep south, takes me a while to tell a story ;-p

darsden said...

oops yours on the other hand Rock 160

darsden said...

see how I had to come back...yep about like my stories

gayle said...

Very sad!

Hope you have a great week!

signed...bkm said...

I love the last verse..watching my Tomorrows grow up in pictures...bkm

Patricia Caspers said...

Wow, yeah. Powerful last lines.

kkrige said...

I am going to break the flow and dare to say that this is not one of my favourites of yours. Hoping that won't kick me out of the fan club though. ;)

I do like the last stanza though.

Brian Miller said...

actually i agree with you k...its not my fave either...had to pare too much away to go 160 and i like the longer write better...for me it waas about being born out of your troubles but not chained to them as it robs you of today and all your tomorrows...i do have kids in similar situ...but this was born more out of a conviction and i used the situ as the metaphor...oh well, not every thing works...

Pat Hatt said...

Wasn't bad
Going all Count of Monte Cristo a tad
At least what the picture and title made me think of first
As I came to read and give my burst
But it did lack your usual flare
Still was well worth a stare
As you always bring great reads to the table
Well because you're able..haha

Sue said...

I think I would like to have read this one before it got put into the cell of 160 characters.

;)

PS. But I do like the notion of "watching tomorrows grow up in pictures."

slommler said...

Yes! It would be just like that!!
Hugs
SueAnn

Mighty M said...

And sometimes you don't get enough pictures either...

ninotaziz said...

Life passing you by. Not lived to the fullest.Sad.

haikulovesongs said...

it would be interesting to see your original longer version, Brian. the ending is heartwrenching!

Goofball said...

powerful!

Magpie said...

It's a shame you had to pare it down. It did lose something in the paring. The photo looks underwater to me.

Natasha said...

So sorry I missed the OneShot this week. Fantastic write to a fantastic picture prompt. Short perhaps, but enough leads to let our imagination run with them. Again, loved it. (Do you ever post anything that isn't awesome!?) :)

lori said...

it's so easy to get stuck in "watching my Tomorrows grow up in pictures" - i don't want to do that. i think this is powerful. the more i read it, the more i like it. :)

Pastor Sharon said...

Be in the moment. Don't let life pass in photographs.