Tuesday, August 24, 2010

as above, so is below (the neck)

intimacy begins above the neck, not that all men realise this, relying too heavily on sexual prowess, leaving them flaccid and snoring & their lovers reading romance novels just to warm the bed.

on the couch, we sit, nothing touching but our feet. usually, i don't like anyone touching my toes, but you know this, and are gentle. you know me. we talk about whatever and everything and nothing, not to fill the space but because we are interested. even in the nothing, that needs to be said.

we don't even have to touch, sometimes it is as simple as washing the dishes. you find it sexy when i help around the house. i know this, so i smile as i scrape leftover bits of dinner off the plates, water rushing into the sink. i don't mind dish pan hands and apparently, neither do you.

these are all intimacies, but when the time comes for even more, it begins above the neck, that tender flesh behind your ears, nibbling a trail to your collarbone. these things i know, because i know you & you know me.

then, intimacy is all the more sweet, when it is time to descend, below the neck.

written for One Shot Wednesday - no theme, just write a poem and come join us. it opens at 5 PM, tonight.

also submitted to 10DOM, a bi-monthly writing contest, whose theme this time is "below the neck".

105 comments:

Mighty M said...

All men should aspire to be like you. Fortunately mine gets it right too. :)

The Bug said...

Nice! I definitely have a happy place that begins in chores.

drybottomgirl said...

You got it! Intimacy on it's best level is when the mundane of life are special. It is sexy when a man helps around the house. It validates just how important all the little things are. My husband and I often sit on the couch too talking about a million little things because like you said it's what you're interested in. Great job...smiles.....

TechnoBabe said...

Yes indeed, intimacy is much more than "getting right to it". Hubby and I like to reaching for hands here and there and touching feet while we read on the couch. All these things are special because they are done in love with the right person.

Susan Deborah said...

I was just about to say what Mighty M said! A penny for her thoughts. An epitome for men who are married, about to be married and men thinking of lovely ways to woo a woman!

You rock, big time as a dad, husband, lover, writer, commenter and HUMAN.

God bless and smiles always,
Susan

Mama Zen said...

Nicely done, Brian!

Eleonora said...

Music, sweet music to my macho Italian-accustomed ears (hardly ever nibbled on).

Intimacy is exactly that. A moment, a shared glance. A burst of laughter. And above all, it's *knowing* each other.

Have a great week. Smiles

Tina said...

Sweet, and intimate. And so true! When you KNOW someone, it's all part of the journey, every look, every little touch. As you say...smiles.

Travel & Dive Girl said...

Very nice! A lot of men could do well to read this.

Valerie said...

You're absolutely right, Brian, although I guess I've forgotten more than I remember ... smiles. Oh to be young again!

mama-face said...

oh, this would be the post I would read after being gone for so long!

I love the part about talking about nothing. It's those nothings that bring us closer... not all the things there are to worry about.

:)

Eva Gallant said...

You said it exactly right!

J. said...

And I always did the dishes because I hate a full sink!

But there is much to be said for a relationship where work is shared, I agree that then, when the work turns fun, it is better.

Nice!

Daniel said...

Love it. Just said what needed to be said.

Steven Anthony said...

Brilliant.

Steven Anthony
Man Dish~Metro Style

TALON said...

Sweet! Definitely actions speak louder than words - especially in the intimacy department. And I think doing chores can be wonderful foreplay. My hubby is great around the house :)

5thsister said...

This should be required reading for all men involved in relationships!

adeeyoyo said...

You are so understanding of what makes people tick, Brian. Lucky lucky wife... BTW if you're ever looking for a job, you can always teach prospective husbands, lol!

emily wierenga said...

oh, this is true, pan-hands and all. well written.

Claudia said...

oh wow! this is about knowing and being known - about not just having sex but become one flesh - about trust and honor and respect - wow - just love this - and may come back to re-read in a bit...

Liza said...

"even in the nothing, that needs to be said."
I have to interrupt, and say
WOoooooW.

Now,
Get a room you two!

only a movie said...

Good advice for all your husband readership...

Nessa said...

Jeez, this was so hot. You need to do partners counseling.

JStar said...

Ok Brian...Do you have a brother lol.... j/p but more men NEED to realize this...

Becky said...

lol@ Nezza's comment.I agree with her haha.Seriously this was well done.I know what your saying I agree.Intimacy with the person you love even can begin with just a smile or a touch.To me thats sexy,oops can I say that ha.I guess I did.Great post Brian.

Brian Miller said...

nessa, i have actually given couples counseling before...and even in the counseling job i have now with kids, when i work withtheir parents because it affects the kids as well...

Matty said...

You bet my friend. A wise man knows this stuff. If he knows what's good for him.

Bonnie said...

The brain/mind is the most important sex organ ... however ... 'the descent' can be spectacular!

Christina said...

Amazing, a man in touch with true feelings of intimacy. Bravo Brian!

deb said...

perfect , Brian.

Jannie Funster said...

Oh, yeah! The way to the heart and other territories is through the head. :)

Another winner! Well, of course, ALL your poems shine.

xo

Monkey Man said...

Cooking, cleaning, child rearing. It's shared work what can be made a pleasure. Any opportunity to touch the hand of the one I love is a cherished moment. Great post, Bri.

Baino said...

Nah no intimacy in chores but it does start above the neck. You're not partial to foot rubs? Shame, I give good ones.

Betty said...

I think I'll go do the washing up now ... :)

Nancy said...

Smart guy!

willow said...

Nice. No piggy-went-to-markets? Too bad. ;^)

Bossy Betty said...

Oh, nothing turns me on faster than the smell of Comet on a man.

e said...

Another lovely post and a great lesson for the men you're raising.

JeffScape said...

Us chauvinist bastards are waiting for part 2...

Ahem... Hah!

Calli said...

I like the way you think, Brian! You are refreshingly rare and a great guy!
*smiles* without a doubt :)

william said...

cool way of thinking friend, superb post as always :)

Tracy said...

Dang, I should not have read this at work. LOL. I don't like people touching my feet either, and I THINK IT IS SO SEXY WHEN MY HUSBAND DOES THE LAUNDRY! (I hope he heard that.)

sheila said...

lol, my husband does a lot around the house like that. But I don't find it sexy...just helpful. lol

Carrie Burtt said...

If all men were like you Brian, this world would be a better place with families that stayed together.
Lovely post, thank you for sharing it!! :-)

secret agent woman said...

Yes and no, for me. Intimacy for me is about touch. Not necessarily sex, but definitely about skin contact. Without that, I've got nothing for the person.

blueviolet said...

A girl does love a man who helps out, and yes, there are magical rewards for such things. ;)

One Stop - The Place For Poets & Writers said...

Don't let that secret out. All men may realize it's power.

she has a keeper!!!

nice ttdom and One Shot btw

I actually ventured where no Brian had gone before today - lol

La LUNA

SuziCate said...

Intimacy...you nailed it! Lovely.

Betsy said...

T is SO lucky! :)

rxBambi said...

I think I need a cigarette.

You know I don't smoke, right?

You guys are awesome.

CM said...

What a nice poem about the simple, easy ways of a relationship built on real life!

Tom said...

that helping around the house stuff does nothing for me. But i guess if i didn't, it'd do less.
good take on the muse

dustus said...

An excellent example of respect, intimacy, and what's genuine through a relatively short writing piece. Didn't take you many lines to express a great deal. Great write!

Fireblossom said...

Very nice indeed, Brian. Leave it to you to come up with this. :-)

Carolina Linthead said...

Lovely, Brian, in a style that reflects the conversational intimacy you describe. Fun reading all the comments, too!

kkrige said...

Ah Brian, you know why I love reading you? You have such an amazing way with words and images. You think about people and the relationships that you are in with them. You honour that relationship and make it such a beautiful and enviable thing. I read you and am left feeling that I should hold out for something decent and better. There are great guys out there. You prove it with your every word. thank you

Suz said...

perfect

Magpie said...

Very true words.

Desert Rose said...

ahhh Brian! you never seize to amaze me..man,it is sweetly intimate..:))) i love men who help their women around,it is very sexy by the way ;) only these little details that mark the real difference ..SUPER one shot ! ;)

Jill said...

Sounds just right.
I love it when Hubbie puts all the kids to bed and tells me to leave it to him! PURE POETRY to my ears!

ninotaziz said...

Yes, I can relate to this. I am one of those second time lucky.

Sometimes the lovelier it is, the more you fear its lost.

Love becomes too poignant to contemplate.

Beachanny said...

Delightful..truth spoken but so delicately..cup handles, drying spoons, and nibbling ears..the everyday of a lifetime of love. So precious and however long, too short. Beautiful. Thank you.

Teresa said...

That is one of the sexiest poems! This should be part of an anthology of how to get and KEEP a woman!

Lori said...

You are a very wise man to know this! :)

Help! Mama Remote... said...

Um, when does your class start. lol Great post.

Cloudia said...

Sweet & wise






Warm Aloha from Waikiki :)

Comfort Spiral

anthonynorth said...

You've definitely cracked intimacy there.

Goofball said...

T is lucky to have you

järnebrand said...

You are good. I have missed coming here. :) I think I will have to somehow make my significant other read this...! Hugs to you/ Jo.

Cheryl said...

I could feel the tenderness in your voice.

Birdie said...

I felt like I was spying on you guys (not my style!) bc you did describe so vividly the toes touching, the dishes ... I almost felt bad reading it - lol. Mostly I did like you saying 'I know you and you know me'... you did beautifully celebrate the known of two people being together for 'some' time and how to keep the known special :-) happy day Brian!

slommler said...

Well said and well done!!! I feel the need to blush right now!
Hugs
SueAnn

ladyfi said...

So beautiful and tender.

Just Be Real said...

Great post Brian, thank you.

natalee said...

I tell my husband.. Foreplay is helping around the house....I love this post...... You got it head on!!!!!

Pauline said...

you make me smile...

the walking man said...

How many times a day do you help with the dishes?

Lorraine said...

Oh Most Excellent You...I love everything you write...

Tony Single said...

Yes, that is exactly how a loving relationship is. You captured this so truthfully, Brian. Brilliant! :)

John's comments said...

Nibbling the neck is always the key to by bed as well... oh and so is the cleaning but the neck and a morning cup of tea any time! Thanks for dropping by and commenting on my poem The final seaside trip. I hope you have a good week!

DJan said...

Wow, Brian, the post AND the comments are just amazing. I think you are a very special guy, there should have been a warning on this post for some of us...

AngelMay said...

Nice one, Brian.

Wild Rose said...

So true Brian, i love this..spoken like a true lover and real man..

'intimacy begins above the neck, not that all men realise this, relying too heavily on sexual prowess, leaving them flaccid and snoring & their lovers reading romance novels just to warm the bed.'

Why is it that most men don't get this? They need a lesson from you my friend. Great oneshot~

Eric Alder said...

Indeed, this poem itself is an example of what begins above the neck. (Dare we call it foreplay?)

Timoteo said...

She finds it sexy when you help around the house...wish I had known this so many years ago ! LOL But it's true--our major sex organ is our brain. Nice one.

kavisionz said...

I hear ya, Bri... and I think the hubby took tuitions from you... :)

You guys (that help with chores) ROCK!!! But you know that ofcourse :)

Very well written, my friend... Totally LOVED the title!!! Says a lot lot lot!

AmyLK said...

This is beautiful. And exactly what I want in my next one! smiles

Ben Langhinrchs said...

Excellent description of intimacy. Good job!

PattiKen said...

I'm thinking that this should be printed and left lying around the house where other people might read it. All except for the part about helping around the house being sexy. Perhaps that bit should just find its way into conversation. ;-)

Well done, Brian.

The Retired One said...

Whew..is it hot in here? (she says fanning her self wildly)....

Buttercup said...

I loved this..if more can only be like you!!! Respect and intimacy does it for me. Very well done!!

Cor said...

Great poem. What a special bond that you and your lady share! That is fantastic and thanks for sharing.

Pat said...

Okay - so I take my remark back. SOME men are sensitive, or rather YOU are sensitive. smile

KB said...

I'm grinning after reading this because I'm lucky to be with a man like you describe here.

Nice one Brian.

My poem is here.

Mmm said...

I soo love this adn it is soo true. Dish washing together can be so amazing. :)

Pete Marshall said...

apart from the fact that this is extremely well written..i am more interested in what you are wearing when doing the chores!!!! mate we really need to talk MAN stuff a bit more LOL..cheer Pete

Jennifer said...

I wish more of you knew this Brian. But then again, when one of you comes along it's really wonderful. You're a wise fella - so glad you transfer this to your writing.

JH said...

Awww, sweet & sincere write. You should start a class on "Love" 101. All men before marriage should be required to complete. lol

Jessie said...

a great onestop piece. and right on target.

smiles,

gayle said...

Your wife is very lucky!!
I have been telling my husband this very thing for years!!

signed...bkm said...

It is a much sweeter intimacy that has lasting rewards...very nice..bkm

Deidra said...

You are a wise, wise man!

Syd said...

Things we need to remember. Take time and enjoy the buildup. It's the journey, not the destination.

JamieDedes said...

Counselor or social work???? ... there's wisdom and sensitivity here.

Marla said...

Perfect, Brian!!

Bob likes to say he is putting the ingredients together all day long for the evening meal.

He's an excellent cook. :-)