Thursday, August 26, 2010

55 - this boy will be...

this boy
this boy
barely eight
had a stroke
lost his legs &
one arm
half his fingers
cripple
handicapped
before life really began, but...
don't you dare
don't you dare
pity him
give up on him
because
he will be
he will be
an artist
a painter
poet
of life
and is
beautiful
beautiful.
Tell a story in 55 words. Give it a try or just read more, go see g-man.
Posting early, as i have pretty much all week, because my computer is in for a tune up. I get it back tomorrow though. Will try to get back on in a bit...if not I will catch up with you tomorrow.

109 comments:

Brian Miller said...

ha. the formatting actually took...this is my first try at this form of poetry...each side is a poem in and of itself, but can be read all together as a third...

Travel & Dive Girl said...

Wow! Very cool...congratulations on the formatting working for you.

william said...

very well written mate and it worked great, sad poem though, thanks for your visits daily I appreciate it ;)

Katherine said...

Very well done Brian ... it did work! Great poetic trilogy!! Sad but true..that taking pity on those with a disability and feeling sorry for them only places a cap on what their abilities could possibly become if only nurtured the right way! Love the sentiment in this!

Steven Anthony said...

Just beautiful....as always my friend, you amaze.

Steven Anthony
Man Dish~Metro Style
&
Life in the Fish Bowl

natalee said...

Oh my God.. That made me sooo sad... I just said a thank you prayer to God for my healthy kids.... WOW!! That was powerful

Nessa said...

The form is very fitting. It looks like a piece of art and the two columns made me think of crutches.

SuziCate said...

I like your format, and the words are wonderful.

G-Man said...

Brian...
I kinda know your situation, so I'm lightening up on you this week.
Fantastic 55 Son..
This was a masterpiece!
Hope youn had a GREAT Birthday week, hope you get your PC back soon, and have a Kick Ass Week-End!

The Retired One said...

Fabulous! both in form and in content..and most of all in your heart.

Claudia said...

wow - this is cool - got a bit confused first though….great poem - with words of hope where lots of people would see only suffering

Tina said...

Totally cool format, never heard of it before. Looks like it would be a challenge to pull off though...obviously not for a genius like you...this really sang to me.

Pat said...

First off, I didn't even SEE the right hand column till you mentioned it! LOL!

You totally amaze me! Not one, not two, but THREE poems in and of themselves that merge into one? How the heck do you continue to put out such wonderful pieces?

She Writes said...

I wo0ndered how you did it.

Is it true?

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

As always, I loved it.

emily wierenga said...

i love this brian. it has so much heart... compassion is beauty. and i'm sorry your house seems so empty with child gone! how fast they fly away, no? but on wings of faith, no doubt... (i love that you linked up--would you mind adding an imperfect prose button or url on your post? if that's ok...peace, e.)

Mighty M said...

Oh, I love it!

annell said...

Really good Brian. I like that.....

TechnoBabe said...

I think it would be difficult to write actually three poems that are actually two incorporated into one. Or whatever it is, it is great.

J. said...

Nothing can be ruled out can it? Both in poetic form and human resilience...

good work my friend.

Hilary said...

Wow .. I did read it both ways. Very beautifully done. As always.

utopianfragments said...

wow

what a great execution.. absolutely beautiful.

Candie Bracci said...

wow,and your poem is absolutely beautiful too!

Monkey Man said...

Tough challenge made harder. Grea job B. Mine will be up later. (still processing)

TALON said...

Awesome job! (but you practically ripped my heart out with this one, Brian!)

Paul C said...

Enjoy the syncopation of this poem and its meaningful theme.

Titanium said...

A triptych... a cleave... no matter how you cut it, this is a profound rendering, Brian.

Tony Single said...

Brian, I had a sneaking suspicion that I could read this piece as three separate poems. I was delighted when I read your comment and found out that was the case! Woohoo! I'm smart and intuitive... and stuff!

Great poems by the way. Heartfelt and positive. Beautiful. That is one boy I would be honoured to know. :)

lakeviewer said...

"...don't you dare give up on him..." I love this line. Great form.

The Silver Fox said...

Nice pair of poems.

Daniel said...

O.K., this was fun and beautiful. Cool format.

slommler said...

This girl is awe-struck by your poem!!
Hugging you
SueAnn

Brian Miller said...

thanks g! i did get a loaner this evening and will have mine back tomorrow but the grace is appreciated....smiles.

i hope i did not take away from the sotry with my exuberance over the form....it is all too real...but he inspires me even in the pain we go through together...

The Thirteenth Crossing said...

This certainly makes me want to call off the pity party I've been giving myself. Great 55 as always.

55 Flash Fiction Friday: Time Out

CM said...

After reading your comment, I went back and read it again...I really like all three! I love stories of people who overcome their trials and challenges, who rise above.

Tracy said...

OMG. Brian...well, you have left me speechless. I'm sure my husband would like to learn how to do that. Fantastic. Have a great weekend!

moondustwriter said...

It is a hard road though and many just can't get on top of it.
Thanks Brian for the thoughtful 55

glad it's only your computer that is ill
Changing Tide here

Marla said...

ya know Bri....just when I spend an hour trying to put a few handfuls of words on paper, I come over here and see once again what true brilliance looks like and then......

I head back to the shredder shaking my head.

Brilliant kiddo! as always!!

Prayer Girl said...

Love it Brian....the right, the left and the total package.

PG

secret agent woman said...

Interesting format for the poem, and true that you can't write anyone off.

Matty said...

Brilliant my friend. Three poems together.

rxBambi said...

definitely brilliant, in all aspects.

Stan Ski said...

Great formatting and a powerful message.

Magpie said...

What a challenging format and you succeeded splendidly! Hope your computer is back up and running soon. Have a great weekend!

Pauline said...

I swear, you could be handed any number of words and make something fantastic of them!

only a movie said...

Really cool, Brian.

ladyfi said...

Three poems in one - wonderful and moving!

Susan Deborah said...

Now this was a marvellous creation. Three poems in one shot! Cool.

Joy always,
Susan

she said...

cool!

Byz. said...

Stunning, Brian...excellently executed. The subject matter spot on!
Thanks for your visit to my 55!

Eaton. :))

anthonynorth said...

That was cleverly done. I like it!

Thom said...

You are pure genius my friend. I love this format and even before I read your comment I saw the two poems side by side and then went and read the whole thing. Spectacular words :) Have a great Friday :)

Boonie S said...

Clever, but rather upsetting, uh. I see nothing grand about misfortune and suffering. It's only those who've never suffered who tell you that it doesn't hurt.

All the best, Boonie

MorningAJ said...

As usual your words are an inspiration - in more ways than one.
Keep up the great work.

Valerie said...

Actually words fail me, Brian, because the extent of your talent is overwhelming.

Just Be Real said...

Interesting approach Brian..... and it works. Thanks for sharing. Blessings.

A Daft Scots Lass said...

eratic format, great content.

Love it! Well done Brian.

Brian Miller said...

boon...it def hurts...and is a major challenge which seems the greatest understatement in the world...most look at someone like that and see only the ugly though...he is beautiful...and has an incredible heart...and anger...but...so perhaps the beauty is not in the suffering but the overcoming...

laurenmichelleotheim said...

This was beautiful. The format made the poem seem even more powerful. You are an artist.

laurenmichelleotheim said...

This was beautiful. The format made the poem seem even more powerful. You are an artist.

adeeyoyo said...

Now that's original Brian, but not easy to do the formatting, especially if it's anything like WP! It's trial and error at best, saving drafts, editing, etc. what a pain! The story-line is lovely once again, guaranteed to make us realise it is our heart, brain and personality that counts for everything.

Goofball said...

original & beautiful

sheila said...

Yes, at first I didn't see the right side, but this is really, really neat! And how odd that right before I read this, there was a news story about a guy who is a painter and has no arms. Wild co-inky-dink,

Menina said...

the formatting definitely added to the tone of this. It's very sweet and sad at the same time. Lovely, Brian.

cindy said...

Sad, but uplifting in the end.

Birdie said...

yes Brian, these children are beautiful and perfect just as they are, and they are as precious as anybody else ... only those who have been through their experience can fully understand though, I think ... now I'm going to hide my face and cry my own anger away ...

Vicki Lane said...

Nice form -- and a good reminder!

dulce said...

WOW! Beautiful is THIS
Great 55
As always Brian!!

Who Is Afraid of Alfred Hitchcock? said...

Hi! Brian-
What a lovely, poem...let me go back and reread each side separately. Because I was reading from left to right.
Thanks, for sharing!
DeeDee ;-D

drybottomgirl said...

Interesting format but the content is what's really beautiful. Never underestimate the power or potential of anyone....I know this up close and personal, have a great weekend!

Cheryl said...

I love what you did with this. A 3-fer. My lucky day.

Boonie S said...

Brian,
I feel as if I might have struck a nerve. It was not my intention to do so. If I did I apologise unreservedly.
Thanks for your response. I hear and agree with all you say.

Take care my friend,
Boonie

clean and crazy said...

intimate and sweet, very clever writing style and i read it more then once.

BLOGitse said...

you know how to do it...
beautiful writing
and
I like the idea of two columns...

Syd said...

Nice format. And a good message. We can be what we choose, limited only by us.

Scott said...

wow that is real nifty BM! took me a minute to realize what I was looking at lol AWESOME!

Calli said...

Loved this, together or separate.
Great, great message too!

...smiles

Jessie said...

very uplifting, well done!

smiles,

Arts Web Show said...

This is excellent.
I really like the echo effect of this.

gospelwriter said...

pity is the last thing anyone needs... love your 55, and the form works wonderfully as 1/2/3 stories. Layers. Well done!

Meeko Fabulous said...

This was really neat! Three poems for the price of one. :)

Enchanted Oak said...

This was wonderful. Not just a format, but a power piece in its own right.
Mine is here

Nancy said...

Wow - unique!

John's comments said...

Clever use of form to capture the feel of the boys experience. Thanks for dropping by to hear or read my Friday 55

Dorraine said...

This was so sad but touching. I'm impressed with your desire to explore different poetry expression. I've never seen this type of verse before.

AmyLK said...

I like it! The story and the formatting. It did take some concentration to read it correcly! lol Happy Weekend.

Cinner said...

Lovely Brian, always amazes me the strength I often see in others. take care, enjoy your weekend.

Alice Audrey said...

That's right, never give up on him. Very well said.

Mama Zen said...

And, this is beautiful, too.

PattiKen said...

Wow. Very cool. I can't imagine how much time this took. I'm beginning to think that in addition to being a romantic husband, dedicated father, committed advocate of the young, and writer extraordinaire, you are also a magician.

Would you make me younger and thinner, please?

Jannie Funster said...

Very interesting form.

And awesome poem!

xo

Paul C said...

Hi Brian, I just provided a link for this inspiring poem. All the best.

Bossy Betty said...

SO powerful!!

Leah said...

so very very lovely and bang-up formatting, makes it work beautifully.

The Urban Cowboy said...

Awesome how two separate merge to become a third!

Jaime said...

well done, as always

ds said...

So beautiful. You really made the form work for you. (I read it as one & then went back & separated the strands). There's a book called Joyful Noise: Poems for Two Voices by Paul Fleischman--do you know it?--that uses this format. Each poem is meant to be read as call and response...
My heart goes out to this boy. Thank you for sharing his story.

The Empress said...

This was such a cool trick. I'm going to do it with my guys, we will enjoy it...

It came out very nicely, Brian. VERY NICELY.

joanny said...

I am in awe at your versatility, wonderfully done. Bravo

Have a nice week end, with your family,

Cheers,
Joanny

RNSANE said...

Outstanding job...but I don't think I'll try it, Brian...it's too hard to teach this old girl new tricks.

kavisionz said...

THIS WAS BRILLIANT!
This was like 3 reads in one!!!
The thought behind the story - this by itself is excellent...
But the style.. phheww!!! My gosh!

All I can say is, You ROCK, Brian!!! You really do!!!

Zuzana said...

So short and yet so very poignant; a painter and poet of life - what else can one ask for...
Love the formatting.;)
xo

Jill said...

LOVE THIS!
What a message Brian.
Excellent.

deb said...

fantastic.
I love that I never know what to expect here too...

Sophia said...

A sad but beautifully written and crafted piece of work. I love how you remind us that we are not the only ones that "exist" in this world...and that life may seem difficult, but there is always someone out there who has it worse than we do. Appreciate that about you and your writing.

JamieDedes said...

This is interesting formating, which did indeed add to the poem, which was lovely ... and touching .... and have none someone this could be about. Bravo, Brian!

Life with Kaishon said...

My favorite ever.

hope said...

Never give up is a wonderful message!

CatLadyLarew said...

Wonderful, wonderful work, Brian. Don't you dare give up on him!