sun filtered through the window to the bed, where my well worn backpack yawned awaiting the things i would take with me. among the comic books, a piece of melted glass from the ashes at Mr. Wilson's house, one pack of Nabs (those orange crackers with peanut butter), a toy compass and my notebook to record my travels, i gently placed my rubber band bound stack of postcards from Sam. zipping the bag shut, i said goodbye to my teddy bear and my writing desk, and walked out into the world.
when i told my friends my plan to leave, the previous night, they were excited, but each had other plans for the day. Johnny said he saw an ogre sleeping under the interstate bridge and his parents had warned him never to go near it, but i figured it was just another way to keep us within the bounds of our neighborhood. i had saw Mrs. Lilly taking pictures there and she survived, so i figured my chances were good.
i stopped at the lot where Mr. Wilson's house used to reside. no one had acquired the lot, since the fire, so the cats had claimed the spot, lounging on black sooted timbers that had cooled. i could feel their emerald eyes crawling over me as i shuffled past on the sidewalk, and they cried a long farewell as i slipped across the asphalt, making the right turn toward the interstate.
approaching the underpass, johnny’s stories of the ogre itched at the back of my head, but were overruled by the desire to get out of the sun. it had almost melted me during the several hundred yard walk from the entrance of the subdivision and my energy was already flagging. the shadows massaged my shoulders with their cool touch and i lay the backpack at the base of the concrete incline that led up to the bottom of the bridge.
"who do we have here"...a voice thundered around me, gripping me in its thick fingers so that i was unable to move. i could hear a great rush of cloth and heavy feet sliding down the concrete, imagining any minute the ogre’s slobbering jaws would clamp down on my neck. the hairs on the back of my neck stood as i felt him draw close, and my legs gave way beneath me.
blinking my eyes, i saw a great mass of hair with aqua colored eyes staring back at me. what little skin i could see was bright red, and long crack nailed fingers prodded at my forehead. “sorry, i did not mean to scare you”, his chapped lips barely noticeable through the strands of his beard, “why don’t you just sit for a moment.” i watched cautiously as, what i could now see was a ragged homeless man, took a seat not far away and began bouncing a little red ball against the incline.
thwop. thwop. thwop.
“want to play?”, he asked.
we spent the rest of the afternoon, there in the shadows of the underpass, bouncing the little red ball in an awkward game of handball. i shared my plans to leave and he told me stories of how he grew up in the neighborhood, but left the first chance he had to escape. somewhere along the way, he got lost, things did not turn out the way he hoped and he found himself returning to the last place he felt at home, only to find it had moved on without him.
“what is your name?” my curiosity got he best of me, but his answer stole my breath, “Tom”
unzipping my bag, i reached inside and pulled out the bound stack of postcards, “i think these are for you.” he stared at the picture on the first card for several minutes and I imagined he saw the same worlds i saw every time i looked at them. then he carefully slid the first one out to read Sam's message, a tear rolling slowly through his beard as he smiled.
he placed the little red ball in my hand and whispered, “thank you.” raising himself up, he tucked the postcards in his pocket and began walking toward the edge of town, whistling as he went. i watched him until he was lost in the haze rising from the road, then i turned to head back home, bouncing the little red ball the whole way.
thwop. thwop. thwop.
This is a Theme Thursday post.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
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72 comments:
Threepeat.
God bless.
I mean one minute past, if that is not totally awesome then I don't know what to say.
Gotta go read it now, because one has to be fast, very fast, okay very, very, very fast here.
GBA
lol mrsu...you are killing me...so i think this will be the wrap of my exiled in suburbia series...its been fun but i need a break from it....tried to wrap a few things up...ended up a bit longer than i woul have liked but...it coulda been longer. lol.
Thanks for filling in the details. My curiosity has been slaked.
Oh and this is not a criticism my friend, but an editor's point. You seem to use "passed" when you should be using "past". As in, he walked past us. Ultimately your book editor will catch these things for you.
Blessings my friend.
lol fabulous story brian as always ..hehhe was smiling at one of your commenters, past, passed, hehe
And it was a good wrap, I really liked it. I could say what an ending but I think you all ready know that it was an awesome ending. I mean to find Tom in that way was pretty good. But do you think you might want to start one about what happened to Tom when he left and what adventures he experienced. Plus why he became homeless.
I really enjoyed this series.
God bless.
Brian,
You could change it to "shuffled by", I think that would work too. Maybe better then past.
God bless.
Nicely done my friend. I enjoyed how you tied them together.
great post for the theme. however I am noticing a grave crisis on your blog lack of swamp monsters lol.also can you believe maha got plagerized
I loved the suburbia series; great way to wrap it up!
Oh, what a treat to have the stories tie together like this. I had several favorite bits: yawning backpack, emerald eyes crawling, stories itched at the back of my head, shadows massaged my shoulders with their cool touch. It's treasures like these that make your work stand out. GREAT ending.
aw...i'm joining the party at the end! bummer. but what a beautiful tale. i clicked over to read about "Tom" and found myself where the wild things are. fantastic!
so...nabs. i thought for sure my dad had made up that name for those crazy orange peanut butter cheese crackers. he brought some with him when he visited from va last week. they're still in my pantry. nabs. ;)
Imagine that, a friendly ogre. Great continuation of the Sam story.
Amazing, once agaain!
Oh how I wish this were true! It feels sooooooo real.
I think it was a wonderful ending for the series, Brian. I'm so glad that Tom got his postcards. I loved that he walked away whistling and gave the red ball to the boy. You write so well that it just leaves me wanting more...
I thought for sure you were going to give me an ogre!! I am glad for the turn it took. Beautiful and poignant.
Hugs
SueAnn
Brian, you did it!! You got the postcards to Tom. So they brought joy to both little boys. You did a fantastic job of bringing this all together. Masterful!
I stand by my previous comment: signed first edition, please. :)
(I LOVED that Tom got his postcards!!)
-C
Hi! Brian,
This story was very interesting...because the story did one important thing...piqued my interest...In other words,
I was curious about the outcome of
the main character and the ending of your short story.
Thanks, for sharing!
DeeDee ;-D
Brian-I didn't know this was a series...Therefore, I have to take a few steps back because I'am..."lost."
DeeDee ;-D
Beautiful!
Bouncy bouncy...
Aloha from Waikiki :)
Comfort Spiral
Wow. Another GREAT ending. I love that. now, is it true or what? such a sense of closure here on so many levels. Love it, Brian. You are amazing.
Get out! I love it!!! I love that the postcards found their way to Tom.
Great story.. a happy ending perhaps?
I remember Sam and the postcards. A nice connection you made by reminding some of your earlier pieces.
An ending everyone would want. Great.
And as an aside: Paul was right. Spain won!!!
Joy always,
Susan
Now I am happy for Tom. Thank you.
Wonderful. I love the way this came full circle. Thank you.
Layers of meaning. Love your writing Brian...
I really enjoyed this story my friend, from start to finish.
........:-) Hugs
I'm so happy Tom got Sam's postcards... such a victory! Great ending to an awesome story!Heartspell
Thanks Brian. There is some hope for us after all if kids can be left to grow up with their innate goodness. Wonderfully positive story!
I've known quite a few ogres who turned out not to be. I really enjoy your memoirs.
By the way, am I going mad or isn't there a link to you on TT this week?
He knows too that he now has the pleasure of savouring each postcard, stretched out ahead of him.
What a lovely ending - it touched my heart.
Very nice Brian. Since I am relatively new to your writings, I do notice you use the word "yawned," or "yawn" a lot. I think it is clever how you do so is what I am saying. Blessings to you dear one.
seriously? oh...wow
Something as simple as postcards bringing such joy, very nice.
Brian.Those Postcards could be read as a Relay Race Baton?
He sees the ball hurtling towards him, he swings, connects, rounds all 3 bases, and SCORES!
I love the way in which this story keeps meeting itself in the most unexpected places. People from here appear there, sometimes up front, sometimes hidden in the background. A bit like a Zola novel.
Wow. This was a wonderful ending to the series. Loved it!
Very nice way to pull all these together!
so now we know what happened to Tom ... I love this sentence "and he found himself returning to the last place he felt at home, only to find it had moved on without him." - speechless for that one Brian! great great story :-)
I liked it!
Great story! I like how you wrapped things up - but of course I'm greedy & want more...
We ALWAYS pack nabs when we travel - took some to the lake with us this past weekend. Hmm - I think there might still be a pack in the car...
great wrap up. Can't wait to see what you do next.
Again, you are so talented. Please write a book.
Loved the suberbia series!
Great story, nice way to show a couple of good lessons in the story. And the mail was delivered!
as always.....brilliant!
Brian, did you know how you'd end the story or did it evolve? I love the way you tied everything together and revealed the mysterious Tom.
Great post with a different take on the theme!
Brian - that's just beautiful - you "paint" your characters with such a lot of love - I almost think I know them very well!
...only to find it had moved on without him... scary thought that life would move without one and you can't get ground any more.
So. Not only do I think you should write a book (or three), I think you should teach a writing class. I learn something from you just about everytime I come to visit. Hope you don't start charging us!...my well worn backpack yawned awaiting the things i would take with me.......sigh. I have great writer's envy. Keep on writing...please.
You certainly tied a lot of stories into this one! I have loved your suburbia series and anytime you want to head back there, I will read!
This is wonderful, Brian. Those two needed to find each other to find their ways home.
P.S. I'm glad Tom finally got Sam's postcards.
What a cool friendly ogre. It's all beginning to add up. Well written!
That was seriously cool how you did that, Brian. I'll be sorry if this series ends.
Good tale, Brian. Now I'm headed back to catch up on segments one and two. Nothing like reading the ending before the beginning. Really cheating, isn't it? I feel unhappy about that. Have made it a point to NEVER view the ending of a tale no matter how desperately I want to know how things turn out. Sigh. But still, as a standalone story, it almost stands alone!
Like everyone, I was pleased to read that Tom got his postcards. This was well written and well constructed, I loved it.
wow.
I was totally wrapped up in reading this. Not much holds my attention, but this did. So well written.
Oh wow....what a great story. It is one of those stories that remind me of a power greater than myself. I don't think these things are coincidences.
I knew a girl who looked like an ogre.
Awwww. Loved this.
I guess I reached the end of the story and now I have to go back to get the rest of the goodies. I like what I read already and the curiosity is going to get the best of me.
I love how you tied the stories together, that Tom gets his postcards, he sheds a tear, and goes away happy, and the little boy doesn't run away. Nice ending!
I like the way you wound your other posts in here Brian, you know you're capable of writing a childhood memoir out of these, a longer piece. It would be fun to see you try.
I enjoyed this ending even though I have never read the beginning. I look forward to reading future posts.
I'm glad Tom got his postcards!
you're gonna quit the suburbia series just now that I start to feel familiar in your area? poooh :p
Wow. I love the way you build to this moment through the series. This is great.
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