Thursday, April 29, 2010

55 - venti longevity

in the back of the coffee shop
on the comfy brown chairs
they sit,
she rocking slowly,
caught in an unseen breeze,
he stroking his beard,
rarely speaking, but
every once in a while
her hand sneaks across
to squeeze his leg,
leathered lips curling,
as he takes another sip
of their gentle kinda love.

Tell a story in 55 words. Give it a try or just read more, go see g-man.

I see this couple all the time in the back of the coffee shop. Maybe, I am catching a small glimpse of the future, or maybe i just hope so. Happy Friday everyone!

126 comments:

Daniel said...

Lovely observation of a small thing that means a big and deep thing.

Jingle said...

it is so very quiet,
I guess it is happy time for you,
dinner time?
kidding!
Cool 55.

Titanium said...

Here's to longetivity- for them, and for us all.

Lisa said...

I wish that type of love what the norm instead of the exception these days! If I were to dare to love again, this is the type of love I would want...the quiet and beauty in the small moments type of love.

Bravo!

Jingle said...

Brian:

It seems like you are in loving mood no matter where you are, nobody knows
the true relation between the two,
but you portrayed them as dreaming lovers...
I wish everyone is as positive as you are.

I enjoyed your 55 tremendously.
Cheers!

Jingle said...

Admirable of everything!
A man with long beard seems like a true gentleman...

Silent,
Excellent,
One small place,
Full of Grace!

loved the images your writing paints.

Maggie said...

Aw, that is very sweet. Sometimes it seems like love like that doesn't exist anymore but I also have seen people like that and hope to see more and give me hope.

Sam Liu said...

Beautiful, sometimes life's simplest observations make for the most wonderful poetry.

Mojo said...

Ahh, to be that familiar. And I love the title too. But really... who can afford Starbuck's on a fixed income??

Prayer Girl said...

This reminds me of the love I watched pass between my mother and father even once she was lost to us in her Alzheimer's disease. His hand would rest gently around her shoulders as they sat in front of the television.

Beautiful yet sad. Their love never died.

PG

Green-Eyed Momster said...

How sweet!

Cop Mama said...

Oh, so beautiful! I love watching older couples. Gives us all hope that even in the struggles, marriage can survive!

5thsister said...

let's hope to the future, Brian. We should all be so fortunate.

dustus said...

Wow, you portray unspoken comfort and contentment in 55! Excellent piece, Brian.

Mighty M said...

"gentle kinda love". Love it.

SandyCarlson said...

A beautiful thought, a beautiful image in this story. Thanks, Brian.

Cindy said...

I think that he's wearing Old Spice Cologne...

g-man said...

For years I spent every Friday night at Border's...
Observing the very same thing.
Excellent 55 Brian.
Thank you very much.
Thanks for visiting, and have a Kick Ass Week-End...G

Bonnie, Original Art Studio said...

Gentle and sweet, Brian.

Wings said...

Good couple to be.

Me said...

That was lovely. I adore seeing older folks in love...it warms the heart.

Jill said...

That sounds wonderful. A great combo...true love, a good cup of coffee, throw in a good book and a homemade pastry and its a small slice of heaven!

hopepoh said...

cute poem :) really sweet :D

CottageGirl said...

It's like you saw Tony and me on the garden bench this evening! Were you peaking? ;->

slommler said...

Oh yes! That gentle love makes the comfortable with each other and within themselves.
I loved this...so simple; yet serene.
Hugs
SueAnn

Crazyasa said...

This reminds me of the coffee shop I frequent. Same couple! Perhaps coffee shops use this image as a marketing tool. haha Love your poetry.

Peter Stone said...

Great one, Brian. I see elderly couples in the supermarket, walking hand in hand as they shop. That's the future I want too.

My 55 is Perceptions Colored

Velvet Over Steel said...

Wow, that is great and in 55 words! I could so picture them in my head just now! :-) ~ Coreen

Tracy said...

I hope we all have a future like that. I love to read your lyrical and descriptive observations of everyday things.

Janna said...

Aww!
This is sweet.

Peaceful and meaningful.

I like it. :)

Cinner said...

I love this such a love is rare, and if we find it we are truly blessed. and I know we are. take care, have a great friday.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Oh, I love to watch folks and imagine a life for them. My dad remarried after my mom died and seeing him and my new mama holding hands makes me so happy.

Stan Ski said...

I think we all want to grow old with moments like this.

Changnoi said...

Sounds nice, but a long way off for me.

Kat_RN said...

Isn't the thought of that what makes it all worth while? I am lucky to have someone I am enjoying growing older with.
Kat

Monkey Man said...

That is very sweet. You paint such a picture. My 55 is HERE.

Jingle said...

It has been jumpy and rushy for me tonight..
Hope that you have fun!
I will take off and will read 55 of others tomorrow.

A moment of peace here!
Good Night!
Rest yourself as needed!
I treasured your kindness and encouragement!

xxx

Ronda Laveen said...

Ahhh, sweet. I know coffee makes me feel all quivery inside too!

TALON said...

A really wonderful, fully packed, 55 words.

Enchanted Oak said...

Good for you for observing and being touched.

LadyFi said...

Such a tender observation... gives me hope about the future!

Alice Audrey said...

I love the lines "leathered lips curling as he takes another sip of their gentle kinda love."

Life with Kaishon said...

Oh. I love it.
Love it so much.
You should print this and leave it there for them to find one day.
I think they would love it too.
Maybe you would have to take the leathered part out : ) Who wants to be called leathered? : )

Eaton Bennett said...

That makes me want to cry. If allowed, love can lead to this harmony. Beautiful, Brian! :))

Magpie said...

It is a gift you have to see and tell of everyday things that are far from everyday things. :)

Mmm said...

Adorable. my heart is melting right along with their warm cuppa. Man, you are good! :)

Mrsupole said...

Funny I thought you were writing about your possible future and then you say it is a real couple and maybe a hint of your future. You have a wonderful chance of this happening. Love will make it happen.

God bless.

järnebrand said...

Sounds like you might very well be catching a small glimpse of the future there... :) A beautiful, inspiring and sweet 55! /Jo.

Sh@KiR@ CK said...

So sweet,romantic and tender!
I love it!
Mine is here
I have three 55 to offer.
Hope you like them.
Have you a blessed weekend!
hugs
shakira

Eternally Distracted said...

You are just so sweet :0)

Birdie said...

Your eyes and heart are wide open Brian :-) I used to meet one very old couple few years back, in a different town then. They were holding their hands and walking together in the street, then they had a place where they rested for a while. In the fast city pace with people all over and the noisy cars, they were almost grotesque but to me they were the beauty of love, life... sigh ... I don't live there anymore but I will not forget them ... beautiful post. again. have a great w-e.

ishabellemanalo said...

how sweet..... i wish to have the kind of comfortable silence in a relationship...

anthonynorth said...

Good on them. A lovely story.

Alan Burnett said...

This little beauty was so descriptively rich that I was convinced you had cheated and checked the word count. You didn't. Well written, well done.

sheri... said...

how lovely, brian! your 55 convinces me that there is no fear in the absence of words, something this woman still struggles with!

Baino said...

Brian this was so sweet. I will never grow old with my true love. Plans of mice and men. My parents in law are like that. Amazing.

Goofball said...

so sweeeeeet

Zuzana said...

I loved this, I am wishing for something like this in my future indeed.;)
Always love your romantic posts. Have a great Friday,
xoxo

John's comments said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JennyMac said...

I can completely picture them. Love this.

otin said...

You and T are so happy together that it could happen that you end up like that in a coffee shop!

Syd said...

I hope that they have a good comfortable love like the brown chairs on which they sit.

John's comments said...

oops wrong link posted, Powerful issues here. Also Gone for a poem this week based on the Etheree form created about twenty years ago by an Arkansas poet named Etheree Taylor Armstrong It normally consists of ten lines of unmetered and unrhymed verse, the first line having one syllable, each succeeding line adding a syllable. I added an extra row for the word count and the punch line. See what I mean here.

Hootin' Anni said...

leathered lips curling....don't know if I'd like that or not. LOL

Excellent, and filled with the intrigue of a Mickey Spillane romance scene I think.

Mine this week if DOUBLE STANDARD As always, scroll down a bit, below my Friday's Show n Tell.

Have a super weekend fellow 55'r!!

Pauline said...

amazing how so few words can draw such a complete picture

Katherine said...

My husband & I have been married now for 23 years. We do talk a lot but there are times when no words a needed and we can convey what we want through a look or a touch.
I love to watch people in the way you do too Brian. There is so much love to be seen..if you're looking in the right places & at the right time. Small gestures, gentle touches, loving smiles ... they surely do tug at the heart strings, especially when you know they have stood the test of time, such as the couple in your coffee shop.
You are a tender heart Mr Brian & this shines through like a diamond in the sky in this post! Never change my friend..stay just as you are!!

blueviolet said...

Seeing older couples in love always makes me smile!

CherylK said...

What a comforting scenario. You portrayed them beautifully, Brian.

JStar said...

This is a heart warming 55 Brian, Thanks for checkin mine out! See, this is the kinda love I want...No words needed, that life lasting type of undying love...I imagined this to be an elderly couple even before the "Leather lips" was mentioned...I want that someone to grow old with, and change my Depends LOL...

Vicki Lane said...

Great title -- lovely close. Long life and continued happiness to them!

dusty said...

Yeah right! til they get home. Those are exactly the type who have a box full of chain, whips, and those ball head sets that gag your mouth type things.

Nice 55 Brian

Yvonne Osborne said...

Nice snapshot of a couple in love across the ages. You are a poet because you observe things like this. My favorite line is "she rocking slowly, caught in an unseen breeze"

Kristine said...

oh perhaps love does not have to be expressed in words, esp for them. It reminds me, I once sat near a couple doing ho-hum in Starbucks. Thankfully, they got kicked out.☺
have a great spring weekend!

jhsketch said...

Very sweet!

Joanie M said...

Sounds like John and me, except he would never be drinking coffee. Tea maybe. :) That was lovely! Made me smile.

Jingle said...

RE: CottageGirl:

your comment is funny,
It is good to see you shine like this.

loving couples are everywhere,
Brian is the ONLY guy who crafted it in poetic form in this case.

Stupendous Achievement,
Brian Miller!

clean and crazy said...

i love watching couples like that, i imagine, the romantic that i am, that they are living happily ever after...
at least on the outside looking in. great 55 thanks for stopping by

Luisa Doraz said...

alking...Italian! :) lol Have fun today. I am happy because my Mom is feeling better now. :)

Six Feet Under Blog said...

It's the small moments that count.

TechnoBabe said...

Only a kind and loving man like you would view an older couple in such a sweet manner. This is wonderful.

Akelamalu said...

Have you been spying on MWM and I? LOL


Lovely 55 Brian, I like it very much. :)

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Awwww! That's so sweet! I bet you and your wife will be that couple one day... ;)

Lorraine said...

Oh my, you had me at coffee...I love this, I love this love that never ages, I love what you did here, bravo bravo Brian

RNSANE said...

Such nice thoughts, Brian. I never had love lasting like that - except from friends...and I am not really complaining. It would be nice to grow old with someone but I cherish friendships as well.

Teri said...

I love the title "Venti longevity". Those venti's keep me coming back (and also keep me awake!) You too? Brian, we you see things like this that spark a poem, do you write down certain words or phrases right at that moment to help you remember or is it just serendipity that brings them to mind again? A certain prompt, a certain thought?? Just curious! Thanks for you comments by the way. I'm surprised you ever have time to write anything with all that you do. You have so many people here to read, you have a job, a family, a hobby or two. How do you manage? I suppose you don't watch much TV? That is probably my down-fall. I get "hooked" on certain mind-numbing shows. Entertainment, relaxation, just vegging time!

justsomethoughts... said...

pretty

Meeko Fabulous said...

You are so observant. I love how you find inspiration in the smallest of gestures. :)

lakeviewer said...

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! May they be this close forever.

annie and katrin said...

lovely!
that's it, that's what i long for

Together We Save said...

Great story!!

buffalodick said...

Very good!

Jingle said...

http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/04/30/family-fridays-who-is-she/

Good Afternoon, Brian:
How do you do?
some gifts from Trisha, posted, passing to friends, 4 from her,
plus 2 from me...
have fun!

Thank you for the support.
comments for this post is fun to read...you rock!
;)

Thom said...

How romantic my friend. The small things in life. I love it :)

chitowngreg said...

Nice one. Thanks. Mine's up as well at http://bit.ly/8dt963. Have a great weekend!

Tara Miller Writes said...

love this. It is profound.

Tara Miller Writes said...

Thank you for participating in Wordy Wednesday. The first full story is posted at http://taramillerwrites.wordpress.com/2010/04/30/wordy-wednesdays-first-full-story/

ModernMom said...

I adore those couples!

Mama Zen said...

Oh, I love this! I hope it's a glimpse of the future for all of us.

Sh@KiR@ CK said...

Me got awards, tribute and nominations for you? Happy Weekend! hugs shakira

Tammie Lee said...

love that last through the ages
wonderful poem

Marianna said...

I'll say it in one word...love it (ok it's two)!

Take care
xoxo

Barb said...

venti wonderful!

Dulce said...

Brien dear,
you always amaze me...
thanks for coming by
you are great!
;)

Andy Sewina said...

Nicely recorded, these images will stay with me. Coffee to die for!

Jingle said...

I am catching a small glimpse of the future, or maybe i just hope so. Happy Friday everyone!

In your own words,
keeping hope alive is cool!

Jingle said...

I am catching a small glimpse of the future, or maybe i just hope so. Happy Friday everyone!

In your own words,
keeping hope alive is cool!

naramalone.com said...

What a beautiful picture of love that endures.

william said...

yes, small things can have deep meanings brilliant mate, have a great weekend :)

Felicitas said...

Brian, this is really lovely! I look forward to being a part of just such a couple one day too.

Lulda Casadaga said...

Lovely little glimpse of a 55!
I still say LARGE when I go into starbucks! :D

PattiKen said...

Brian, that is beautiful. So many people would look at them, and not see the lifetime of communication passing between them.

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Bravo. Now I want coffee....and a comfy chair......and to squeeze someone's leg. :-)

Jingle said...

http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/05/01/week-16-the-perfect-poet-award-announcement/

Good Evening:
I got the perfect poet award posted.
Other awards will be done tomorrow night or Sunday...
I won't be around until tomorrow afternoon.

Happy Friday Evening!
Happy Saturday!

Jen said...

When you get to the point that you no longer feel the need to fill every silence...when you're comfortable just sitting together...that's when you know it's real...

sakhii•• said...

simple yet beautiful!!creates a nice atmosphere!!

Larry said...

leathered lips asuch a great discription Brian I liked this one as all of yours. Thanks Larry

Mr. Stupid said...

Very Beautiful. Wonderfully written...:)
Have an awesome day!

the walking man said...

Yeah...I know this place.

Wordwand said...

a great poem about what seems a trivial situation for the common men , well done Brian.

Mona said...

that is a perfect moment :)

Ariel said...

beautiful expression of love...yes, such small things speak volumes.
Happy weekend Brian.

suryagni said...

very lovely. :) simply beautiful.

secret agent woman said...

I imagine a history for people I see, too.

Marla said...

We do that. See older couples and say, "That's us pretty soon."

jake said...

I had people that made out in my coffee shop. It all started with a squeeze, too I would imagine. They were old. It was awful. ;)

Aron said...

great one.