why do you ask?
well...
who told you?
obviously someone
told you.
yes they did.
they never
should have...
its for
your own good.
nothing good
will come of this.
it will
if you let it,
katherine.
excuse me...
it will...
no, what did
you call me?
katherine..
sorry, you
have the wrong
number...
(click)
Tell a story in 55 words. Give it a try or just read more, go see g-man.
Decided to try my hand at something a bit different today and let the burden of the scene rest on the dialogue. Was inspired by on of the writers at Magpie Tales, who let the burden of the story rest on just describing the surroundings.
I am traveling and speaking all day Friday up until midnight, so I will catch up with you on the weekend. Have a great Friday!
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119 comments:
Ohhh, a secret about to unfold, but she sees her escape and hangs up.
Tricky! Great 55, Houdini.
well this was great. love the misunderstanding, although something must have been there.
T 13 - Magical Creatures
Funny and it leaves you hanging, nice.
cool 55,
best wishes for tomorrow's talk,
take care and have fun!
Ha!!!
Reminds me of a time I called about a student and left a message ... on the wrong number!
Fortunately I didn't give the child's last name nor any info other than a request for a conference! ... AND later found out I knew the person that I left the message with!
Great writing, Brian!
Got me again, Mr. Magician.
Oh so elusive, our imaginations can only fill in the gaps.
Oops, good one.
Oops.
I wonder what this woman did! I guess it goes to show we've all got something to hide!
Well I must say it is a nice name!!!
Have a great day Brian!
Watch out.. be careful of the old Freudian slips...they can get you into trouble, especially if there is no phone to divide you!
Great 55! Hope you have a happy Friday and weekend.
I dig that, man. That's screaming out loud in 55 typed words. Serendipity hanging by a dial tone.
Ha ha ha... You ROCK!
Wonderful 55!
I should have thought of THAT! ha ha ha...
hugs
shakira
Hey, this has happened to me quite a few times.
Thats why every phone call should start with.."Did I catch you at a bad time?" hehehehehe
Excellent 55 Brian.
Loved your change in style You Rock Brotha!
Thanks for playing, and have a Kick Ass Week-End...G
very good brian, much suspense I would say u cracked this, superb :)
Very cool!
clever, very clever!
I love it. You have the wrong number. Awesome 55!
I have made the wrong phone call... UGH! Not a good feeling, though well written!
Ha! My mom called me (angry) asking why I was leaving "filthy" messages on her answering machine. Turns out it was a wrong number. They person left a mean message with a couple of curse words thrown in. I really don't know why she assumed it was me.
This was great. I use to dial the same wrong number quite often as it was one digit off from my home phone number. The person on the other end had a classic sense of humor and would play along. We became good phone friends. I can't tell you how many witty quips this lady would come back with. LOL
My 55 is here: My Invisibility
Everyone has a secret, Great poem!
Gerardine
Not sure if I have gone that far before, but once I tried to get into "my" car that belonged to someone else and the gal was sitting in the drivers seat. I'm sure I scared her to death before I realized it wasn't my car!!
Hope all goes well this weekend!! :)
Namaste.....
Interesting entry. Just stopped by from Joseph's place.
Stay blessed and enjoy the rest of the week.
Good one Brian, you had me all caught up in the scene, waiting to hear what they had been told, only to find its a wrong number? Arrgh
My 55 is Everything I Lack
A woman's worst nightmare...being called another woman's name by her lover.....
good one, Brian....
Great sneaky ending.
My humble 55 for your perusal.....
FACEBOOK
Love it, Brian!Have a good weekend!
Great twist at the end. I thought, "Oh no!" Thanks for sharing this.
Thanks for visiting and commenting over at the poetic rabbit's casa. Sorry about that cryptic poem the other day. I don't mind writing things with open interpretations, or even poems that require a bit of thought, but I never set out to write something confusing. The poem should have stood alone, without the photo. It needs some polishing.
Thanks for not giving up on me. Glad you like today's blackbird haiku.
http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/03/19/55-how-do-you-relax-during-weekends/
mine is up,
kind of dry,
Happy Thursday evening!
I love the twist in this.
I’m up right HERE
Excellent. I have been on both ends of that call. My 55 is HERE.
Love it, Brian.
hehehe well she's not alone in what she's done whatever it is. Great 55. ;-)
Oh, funny! Years ago our number was one digit off the number of the bakery at Kroger ....... I must confess that I took a couple of cake orders from time to time when I was annoyed.
Wrong number but a perfect brew :)
You really pulled one on us today with this 55. Kind of a heavy conversation to have with a wrong number person.
I wanna know what she did! Hahaha!
Different works for you, Brian! But you are so talented that EVERYTHING seems to work equally well!
Have a wonderful weekend.
Masterful...
remember that fifties song "silhouettes on the shade"?
Aloha from Hawaii my Friend!
Comfort Spiral
Ah...SAVED!!
You had me going. Now I want to know what shouldn't have been told.
Ah, a wrong number or not giving you my number. Fun!
Katherine the Great? You must be older than I thought. ;)
Another great 55!
Talk about a recipe for paranoia! This would be a great beginning to a murder mystery!
nice job you trickster! mine is up but not so fun.
HERE
brillaint !
Damned telephone salesmen....
Oh I loved this Brian, in fact I may say something like this to my next unknown caller......:-) Hugs
Oups... Great 55. I guess everyone is hiding something...
My 55 is up.
/Jo.
Have a great Friday Brian. You'll be speaking! I can't help wondering if your language will be like you write:)
Great and cute 55:)
I love this... It left me wondering as to whether it really was a wrong number, or did she just hang up and pretend it was a wrong number?
Enjoyed that. Great ending.
Oh the interesting conversations a talker can have with a wrong number...the dialogue worked very well Brian.
Your experiment works well.
Oh that Katherine.
Awesome awesome post, Brian. Your poetry (and comments) are legendary.
Love you, man.
Some secrets are so 'common' :D
I guess it is dialog all the way in 55ves today :D
Very good! Oh the things we let slip unknowingly . . .
Mistaken identity its a scary thing.. -J
Now that is silly.
Kat
lol. We used to have a # that was one digit off from the blood/plasma bank. We used to get some reallly weird calls. And uh...'foam' henge? Too bad we missed THAT one, lol.
Wonderful twist, Brian. I liked this.
Nice shift in 55 Brian!
I'm up after a few weeks off:
Friday flash 55 ~ Pride
Wrong number...One Ringy Dingy...LOL Excellent Brian. Have a great weekend :)
Whoa....this is a different style of yours shining through this week...I like it!!!
Here's mine Take Pleasure - 101
Have a super terrific weekend.
That was very intriguing. A new way indeed to present stories.
Mine is up!
That actually made me laugh.
Happy trails Brian.A Good 55 Sir!
I liked your 'bit different'. It worked really well and I think you've done a great job in 55 words.
This was a cool take. We all have something we are guilty of doing. Great post Katherine .... err ... Brian.
Maybe next week your 55 could tell us what her secret is...have a great weekend!
happy trails and safe travels!
It works. And mysteriously leaves us hanging as a flash is wont to do.
Reminds me of the email I got this morning from someone asking if I was their long lost friend Yvonne from New Hampshire.
Have a good weekend.
I appreciate your PO very much the picture with the article. Continues to refuel!!
Ha!
Hope your speaking engagement was a resounding success.
My 55 is Here
Nice out Katherine!
Travel safely! You'll do wonderfully!
Good twist!
LOL Opps
I really liked this. 55 words and you wrote an entire chapter/story with a moral at the end.
I've learned over the years not to say something unless you can say it to that person's face. Keeps you out of this situation.
the name is wrong ... the secret, it may be the same.
well told!
Brian darling, succinct and brilliant as always. Do send your lovely commenters my way, won't you? 85 for goodness sake! You deserve every one!
whooops...
Ok, I read it like two or three times and each time I giggled imagining the big Oops Face the caller must have had when he realized he wasn't calling Katherine. :)
Ha Ha - gotcha! That's a good one. So much said, so many twists and turns, in so few words.
wwooooww...that was awesome brian...
wonder how you guys manage the 55 word story..
m yet to try that.. and i wonder if i shall be able to do justice to it..
simply super :)
This was really cool and really left me wanting to know more
Love the ending! Now I want to know what the secret is. lol
Very clever.
http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/03/19/thursday-poets-rally-participants-of-week-10-an-award-for-you/
how are you?
Hope that things go smooth and fun,
Happy Friday!
Oh, that was great fun. I loved it.
In fact, I think I've lived through something like it.
thanks all. made it to MD...getting ready to go on for the first of 3 talks tonight...thanks for the encouragement...check in with you later!
Ha! Sounds like something that would happen to me.
this was funny. A misunderstanding and someone else's burden of guilt about to be revealed... Great idea.
Have a great weekend Brian.
Great as always Brian. You are very gifted. Sure hope you are working on a book in the future!
How do you create such magic with just 55 words ? When I got to the end of this 55 I felt awkward ~ like I had overheard a private conversation. And the book is coming out when?
cracking dialogue Brian. Highly effective.
masterymistery at cosmic rapture
Unexpected.. that was a twist, dude;)
thats funny
and two stories intersecting, well almost
Good Morning!
Hope that everything turns out cool and fun!
Best wishes!
Happy Saturday!
Cheers, ;)
Keep the magic and fun coming!
You Rock!
everything went great last night...a little hoarse and sore this morning...traveling back to VA today...so i will be back online tonight or in the morning...
loved the ending and of course the entire poem.
wow look at all those comments, you are a star.
You poem was great, not how I expected it to end. Bravo
Oh I loved it!! Right time...wrong place!! LOL!
Hugs
SueAnn
Hmmm... Wrong number? Or right number wrong? We'll never know.
Good job, Brian.
Wrong numbers can get you into lots of trouble! ;)
What a clever turn! I loved it!
Bravo! I like this approach.
Hope the speaking engagement went well.
Safe travels,
jj
Lol, interesting! :-D
I'm late on my 55s this week. PLEASE write another one to fill in the details of this. It's killing me...what secret was told...who told who...was it really a wrong number...argggggggggggggg...i need to know :-D
♥namaste♥
I suspect you may have gotten this award already. But I enjoy your 55s so much, I'm doing it again to "second" ( or maybe third or fourth) the earlier one.
Wise Words Award
I wonder if this was what that Hispanic lady was saying to me in the phone when I was trying to tell her wrong number..wrong numero! :D Nice job!!
Whoa. Wow. Oh what a great ending. Loved it.
Sorry I'm so late. Loved the twist at the end.
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