My flashlight flickers, leaving retinas stained red in the pitch black bowels of mother earth. The rumbling sound of torn claws pushing through soil fills in the gaps where my vision fails. It is almost here.
-------
Beyond the woods, through the rusty barbed wire, on the other side of the golden fields, there is a hole, gaping like a puncture wound, to the very center of the earth. Chilling breath blows any warmth the sun could provide from our skin as we stare into its obsidian soul. Terrifyingly excited we follow its whispers of adventure.
Pressed to the floor we crawl beyond the entrance way to the main chamber, our flashlights leading the way. The main cavern is vast, our beams losing strength before ever reaching the other side. All sound of the world above is lost in the silence, except for our breathing. It is peaceful here.
Round and round our circle of light finds new passages, deeper and further from the surface, the hard packed dirt floor speaks to the presence of previous explorers or inhabitants, while the mountain of earth above our heads carries the weight of their stories. We are not alone.
Our hearts hammer.
Well rounded and smooth, the tunnel dips then rises into a hollow circular room, just big enough for one man to sit cross legged. Finger size holes dot the walls every two inches, disappearing in depth when we shine our light into them. Shutting off our lights, we breath the deafening silence. Our skin crawls with the energy of the moment.
Skricht.
Skricht.
Skrichtskrichtskrichtskrictskricht...
Our lights flash back on, illuminating a patch of earth on the only path leading out, now moving and cracking from something within, pressing through towards us. Flicker...flicker...darkness. Banging our flashlights buy us a few more flashes as the dirt is now pressing up...
Slip sliding, we leap into oblivion, juggling fresh batteries and plastic flashlight parts as we try to manipulate them into place and escape...
Skritchskirtskritch...
...on our heels...tripping...scrambling for purchase...
Breathless we wheeze against a fallen tree by the mouth of the cave, thankful to be alive. Frantic eyes train on the shadows of our retreat, waiting for our pursuer to step from within, hoping it does not.
Beneath the surface, there are monsters, that will steal your light if you let it. We will go back and face them...one day.
Surface.
For more takes on the theme, visit Theme Thursday.
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87 comments:
Oh! I want to know who your pursuer was? I expected red glowing eyes looming in the darkness over your shoulders.
Very well done. You're brave; I wouldn't be caught dead in a cave. Bats, you know.
oh, i had my run in with bats in that same cave...hundreds of them wiggling on the ceiling...but this monster, we never saw...and i think we might have been glad...
My God how I remember that. You described it perfectly! Funny, but years later I read The Descent by Jeff Long and it conjured up that exact memory.
I, for one, am glad whatever it was... stayed in shadow.
We had a cave where I grew up that they called Devils Cave. It was supposed to be off limits, but we would go down in it. It was not my favorite thing to do!
You had my heart racing right along with you. Demons under the surface that steal your light.........might there be some symbolism there?
When you allow the imagination free reign everything is an absolute adventure!! Fun!
YIKES! That's scary. Maybe it was just a cat. ;-)
smb...while there is some symbolism in that line...the experiece was all too real as cabo can attest...it was a drawer cleaning experience...lol.
You must have had all kinds of grand adventures as a youngsters, close enough to cause panic and mayhem. Watch out, your boys will follow suit. Good yarn.
Very suspenseful! Sometimes facing your fear is good...but not always!
I wonder what in the world that was....
I know it's non-fiction, but >ahem< seems like the start of good >ahem< fiction piece to me.
Typo catch: "we breathe the deafening"
Oh my, I'm afraid caves are just not my thing.....you are braver than I would even think of being...wonder what it was you saw or should say didn't see....Hugs
I love the playfulness of this story.
And all safe at the end.
One of the more terrifying events of my life, was when I was crawling through a narrow passage in a cave, and the earth above me started falling. Your post brought back those memories. Great job! Happy TT!
I've said this before, but I just have to say it again. You have had one hell of an adventurous life! How I wish I could have gone into that cave as well, and I'm going strictly by the awesome description you've given here...
Cheers...
Phew, you made it!... Although I'd have liked to read the story if the monster had got you...even just grabbed your toe ;0)
The description of this real experience resonates for us all on a deeper level than a gripping story. The cave - the occasional glimpses of what lies within - the longing to see and know - the fear of actually knowing - the run from the 'dragon(s)' in the deep - the intent to go back, one day, to illuminate the cave and its shadows -
....but of course you knew that...
I appreciated your nudge on my blog 'toying with a lady' today.
:)
Darn. You're not going to tell us what was doing all that skrichting?
Ohhhh scary... caves are very scary to me. Too dark, too close, and what if there's an earthquake - forever tombed in the bowles of the earth...
Monsters? Hmm another thing to worry about.
Scary!!! I was running in my mind...and telling them to escape and quickly!! LOL!!!
Hugs
SueAnn
Brian, I am terrified of bats. I could never, ever do this!
i get a little claustrophobic so not sure i could have crawled in there with you guys. the poor thing - imagine how freaked out he/she would have been happening upon you and MICHAEL - scary stuff indeed ;) HA! beautifully composed, Brian, once again.
Don't go back until you can draw an army! *Shiver*
What an experience. Did you ever go back?
Don't know why I decided to read your blog as I am ready to go to bed! I will be keeping the lights ON!
I felt claustrophbic. Very real.
I saw everything you wrote about, creepy. It also reminded me of one of my new favorite book series Gregor the Overlander by Suzanne Collins. She also wrote The Hunger Games.If you get a chance, check them out. Gregor is about a young boy who has adventure in a land thats underground.It's easy reading(well it's a young person series!) and fun.
A can feel the surfaces in this one, Brian! Well done sir :)
Certainly terrifying even if it was all in the mind.
good grief! I couldn't get out of there fast enough! yikes.
Oh, so much suspense, however I would love to know what was in the darkness of the cave? I was thinking it could be bats as they love to live in caves and attics of deserted buildings.;)
You always do well with these themes.;)
xo
Zuzana
wooo! i can feel the tension from where i sit. Actually, it is sort of cold where i sit--maybe that's what i feel. Happy TT!
Brian what I liked the best about this is you did not reveal the metaphorical content until the end, yet once you did the entirety of the story became illuminated.
Nice and terrifying...just the way a cave ought to be. The sounds of the smallest animal in the dark can be most terrifying...I know because I sometimes hear that sound in the attic above my bed!
Oooh, so scary! You wouldn't catch me going in a cave. Very descriptive writing, Brian. Love the word obsidian... thank goodness for dictionaries!
wow, you must be able to hear my thumping heart.... great storytelling!!!!
And this is why you all should listen to your mothers when they say, "Don't do stupid things!" My heart was literally beating quickly as I read.
eeeeeeek caves!!
that is one adventure I could not have gone on with you and Cabo, monsters i dont mind so much LOL but caves scare the u know what out of me.
xxsm
A typical Brian Miller adventure, going where nobody else would dare to go and living and loving and learning. If you could bottle that spirit, I know of a customer or two that would be interested in purchase.
I'm just relieved that you had working batteries in your flashlight.
Wonderfully atmospheric words - the stuff of nightmares.
Spooky spelunking - gotta say, I'd rather read about it then do it. Yikes! :)
my heart was a-hammering! glad I didn't read this last night before going to bed!
some people have way too many monsters, they just can't face them all in one lifetime.
this post goes way deeper than the surface of the last dimension.
well done!
warm smiles,
Perfect. I vote for "monsters"
I also like "obsidian soul"
I must be slightly claustrophobic because caves always freak me out - even reading about them! Great post though!
Ah hate the feeling of getting chased someplace dark... but fun
Surface couldn't come quick enough!
Very well done. It's like we were right there with you.
Wow - I was with you every dizzying terrified breath of the way! Wonderful writing.
I'm strictly a surface person. Not too high above and definitely not belong. On our honeymoon my husband wanted to see the catacombs of Christians in Rome. Oh. I didn't enjoy that one bit. Not one. I never stopped walking through them...not stopping to check out ancient carvings or drawings or listening to tour guides sharing stories.
I was on the edge of my seat! Ever find out what it was?
Yikes!
I get the same terror everytime I open a bill in the mail...haahaaaa
It could have been a bear, a bat, another adventurer, or the biggest demon, your fear!
Loved this.
Ooooh...I bet your boys loved this one!
I would NEVER return! NEVER! But, I WOULD tell this story over and over and over!!! ;)
There is always something waiting to TRY to steal your light. NEVER let it.
Ohmygosh, total goosepimples here. Chilling expecially s it reminds me of my spelunking about 2 years ago. Very very dark. I have yet summoned the desire to go back to face anything black down there!
I love this post, Brian. Brilliant...or not, as the case may be, considering the topic but not dark. :)
Oooh, seriosuly, stil feel chills.
I wouldn't go back in. Brrrr
You really have a gift. But cave = place I will never go. LOL.
Always loved caves..none around here..
The mom in me thought: Oh, this is just like the book "Going on a Bear Hunt."
The scaredy cat/practical side in me thought: Oh, I would NEVER go in a cave (after an acquaintance died in one when it caved in on him)
The panic/stress side of me thought: HURRY!
;-)
That totally creeped me out!
Gave me a claustrophia attack just reading it.
When I was a kid you used to be able to wander around Mammoth Cave by yourself. (The last time I went, they had guides- not scary.) There were some scary sections and some really narrow places where you had to pull yourself through on your belly. That place always frighted the hell out of me.
Scary!
I like the wrod 'skricht'
you had me gasping for air. I'm somewhat of a claustrophobe and the idea of going down into a cave is more than I can bear. Well described.
Haha . . why does the flashlight always go bust when you need it most! What eats bats? Perhaps that was your predator. Having said that, I love caves, especially wet caves with little clear pools and stalagtites
I could hardly breath until I got to the end of your story. Well done.
I love this line:
Beneath the surface, there are monsters, that will steal your light if you let it. We will go back and face them...one day.
It could translate into both physical/real monsters or imaginary ones.
Nice. I hate anything below the surface. You can call me a surface dweller.
Yikes! Frightening subject but awesome post.
that was fantastic!
Wow! I was hanging on every word thinking it was ficition and then to read that it was based on an actual encounter made it that much better...You are so talented...
Yikes! It becomes easier to run.... -J
Holy crap!!! Loved this. You never cease to wow me Brian! :)
Great....I can't.....brree....breee...breatheee....now. (pant pant) Freak me out being in a cave!!!
Superb writing! :)
I love all your cave stories and your graveyard stories. They are always so vivid and make us feel like we are there with you. That is truly a gift.
And if you do any more cave exploring, I hope you bring a backpack full of flashlights and extra batteries. Very scary things happen when you go exploring. I think I will stay home.
Hope all is well with your mom. Is she holding up well? Will send more prayers her way.
God bless.
That's it! I'm keeping out of ALL caves.
I'm claustrophobic and after reading this am needing a big gulp of fresh air. This one is a good one!
Namaste
And that is exactly why I wouldn't be caught dead going into a cave.
I had goosebumps reading this.
jj
Creepy! No spelunking for me!
wow. tense. suspenseful.
I loved it.
captures the claustrophobia so well!
AMAZING WOW!Reminded me of "The descent" a bit,lol but yeah we have monsters to face in and out!:)
What was it?! I love "close calls" like that. ;-) Yours is also the first TT:Surface I've seen where we accompany the character(s) beneath the surface of the Earth. I like it.
Sorry so late!
This story is wonderful! I've been caving before. I can sympathize. It's an exhilarating and frightening experience.
Jen
Fantastic, and true. I still feel this way many days.
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