Cool misty fog sits on the knurled surface of the river, soft gurgling ripples back from the banks as our kayaks rip through its texture. Early morning sun leaks through the freshness of a new day, ringing all it touches with a halo. Tenderly poking through the tall, green grass, a fawn sates her waking thirst, barely noticing our passing, as she steals our breath.
Distant rumbling thrashes through the forest surrounding us, breaking our meditative journey. Dragging our kayaks onto a beach, we trace a tributary with our curiosity, hiking into the unknown. Rumbles becomes thunder,as we round the bend to the base of a majestic waterfall.
Scrambling for purchase, our hands and feet coalesce into an intricate dance bringing us closer to the mouth of the cave from which the water plunges. Stringy hair mats to our faces, muscles sting from exertion and the cold kiss of the cascading falls.
Exhausted we sit on the precipice, watching the water throw itself to the fates of gravity. Life leaks between us in so many words as we gape at the beauty of our surroundings, counting all our blessings, between friends.
I think we are going to start trying to have that baby we have been talking about...
For a while we just sit, silent in the warmth of his declaration, staring into tomorrow. There is no doubt that all is right in our worlds.
Two weeks from now, he will leave his wife for his ex-girlfriend and her lesbian lover. Walking through the threshold to a new life, he will never answer my calls or emails again, leaving me watching as all he had crashes into the hard stones at the base of the falls.
Forsaking all, he sought more...
These thoughts were brought back too me as I read the news recently of Tiger. His story makes the news because of who he is, but there are so many more left untold. It leaves me wondering if following your heart is really all that wise, at least without consulting your head...and maybe an honest friend or two.
Once you cross that threshold, its hard to go back...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
61 comments:
I don't think Tiger was listening to his heart......,
I have a few friends who have been in similar situations. It was very sad.
I can only quote your enigmatic comment left at my place a while back, "i am left shaking my head..."
If you explain yours, I'll explain mine.
I think it's all in the head. The only thing that listens to the heart is the circulatory system.
Tiger's a moron, plain and simple. If he wanted to go that route, why bother with marriage?
I think you are being very generous to Tiger, although what do I know.....But what I think is that his head is swollen, his heart is sadly empty, and he is being governed by another member.
Before you mentionned Tiger in your post, your description made the title of the old book/movie spring to mind: "The Heart is a Lonely Hunter".
Half way through that post I was in love, then I was repulsed. Well done. Well done indeed. I'm so glad we're related. It means I can be your gardener when you're a wealthy author. Beautiful, Dude. Beautiful.
With your friend, maybe it wasn't what he was running toward but, rather, what he was running from. It almost read like having a baby scared the marriage right out of him. Well done.
kys, i think you are right...at least no the one with the brain...and it is sad.
yodood, ok i gotta go back and find it...guess there is some splainin to do...
jeff, yep. yep. yep.
bonnie, will have to check out that movie...and maybe i am giving him a little much credit...it just boggles me when those that seem to have it all flush it violently down the toilet...
cabo, chasing your coat tails...
ronda, possibly, i would not know, he never called back...it was like he took on a whole new life...
Well, you know what they say about men and following their head..... hehe.
I think that a person who strays, whether it is a man or woman, is not truly in love to begin with.
no more tiger! the guy's an idiot who couldn't keep it in his pants. i'm glad he's losing some of his advertising gigs.
Can't think of anything sadder...he had beautiful wife and child.
I love that quote...if you start thinking the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, it's time to fertilize your lawn.
I could not agree with you more...
I don't know why people do what they do. Crazy. Selfish. Sad.
Wrong part of the body, me thinks. Of course, we aren't walking in his shoes nor do we know the true situation but only what we are meant to know via our biased, bought and paid for press.
There will always be temptation...I remember another couple named Adam & Eve...Of course, we should not forget Satan either...
I think about Tiger's kids and the heartache they will endure with a broken family. The things (or people) he did were a deal breaker IMO.
I think he was thinking with his wood.
Smiles!!
G.E.M.
"Once you cross that threshold, its hard to go back..."
Powerful words, but not so powerful in the moment or it seems in Tiger's case.
Great piece Brian.
Here to say a threshold was crossed, and the damage repaired. Not so easy. Well worth the effort.
Aberration is the most apt descriptive - void of heart and reason.
"Forsaking all, he sought more"
Sadly, I get that. Great story and tie in to current...events? I'm grateful I'm not famous!
Oh! Those Instant Lifetime Decisions........The Heart Is A Joker Sometimes?
So poignant as always...
I have leaned from my own experiences not to be the judge of the actions of others. The world is full of grey areas and I have myself done less than honourable things in my past, all because I did follow my heart. All I know that I take full responsibility for it all and I have no regrets. In my world, my heart always wins over my reason.;)
Zuzana
its the 'without consulting your head' that creates the problems, not the heart... your descriptions are so so good. they grab ahold of senses and don't let go.
Better to follow Love and realize what we had, then ignore it out of obligation and resenting your wife, always happens to those who think of lust as love, so much hurting for nothing
*shrug* Every human ever born has their own road to walk and walk it they will regardless of the feelings of the heart, the thoughts of the brain or the advice from friends.
As others have said, you brought me to a different place in the first part of this entry. Then you pulled the rug from beneath me. Important and timely words.
first reading your story brought back memories of my childhood,kayaking in NC with my family. then the turn -- well done. i really loved the imagery you created, you awakened so many different senses.
Perhaps a bit of both heart and head, a good mix, would help us all in making such decisions.
Beautifully written... and so true. Once the vase is broken, you can try to fix it but it will never be the same again...
your writing is so... soo... I don't know the word I'm looking for. You fill it in. I felt like I was kayaking with you.
Was Tiger following his heart again and again and again times ten or more? The sad part is he made a choice to take a chance of giving up his children, of changing their lives and them not growing up in a safe and happy place with their natural mom and dad. It happens to so many children. Happened to me. Happened to my kids. As in this post, when someone walks away permanently, it leaves the huge question mark of how would it have been if only....
ok, so maybe i should have left Tiger out of this one, though his story was the one that brought back those days with my friend...the desires of our heart can be deceiving, and overpower the wisdom in our heads...something made him think he needed more...and that is was worth it to throw everything else away...or maybe he was fooled into thinking he could have both...
Gut wrenching to know that materially all your needs are cared for and yet, you can want more more more if you aren't stopped by the Spirit of Truth.
Working with the inspiration that comes with Truth now, I find that I don't get stopped by tragedy and horror so much any more.
I can't condemn Tiger for things I too did in error, but I hope he finds someone who can help him find a better path to trudge.
this is so true...and we KNOW that the beautiful waterfall has the potential to crush and to kill...
So sad for all involved. If Tiger was no who he is...his indiscretion would not be news worthy; but, if he wasn't who he is, would he have done this? Celebrity brings out the worst in some.
Whoa. This mixed up fellow was your friend? And now he's vanished into an existence where he's a living breathing threesome? Life does take it's freaky twists and turns, doesn't it.
PS: You and Otin swear Tiger won't be affected much by all this infidelity stuff. But some realities, once they have changed so utterly and completely (case in point, your friend) never go back to the way things were before. They can't. The veil has been torn.
So true! It happens all the time, but we only get to hear about their stuff cause they're famous. Please tell me you're working on a book somewhere . . . You'd write the next bestseller . . . I can feel it!
Hard to concentrate on clear thoughts, with most of your blood all headed towards your groin area...
I need to start bringing a dictionary with me to your blog. Sadly families do break up all the time. I hate it for all of the victims. I am really tired of Tiger.
I really like your take on the word Threshold as well as the story which is vividly descriptive. As for Tiger, all I can do is repeat what I heard on NPR: the default should be that celebrities cheat. The faithful ones are the exception to the rule.
Funny you should post this, Brian. I was just looking at Kev's and my wedding photos and his best man was his best friend at the time. He and his wife tried for ages to have a baby and finally they adopted. The whole time, he had been having an affair and ultimately, he left her with the newborn that was her salvation.
Kevin has not spoken to him since.
They're saying that Tiger is a sex addict and as such we should treat him as we would anyone with an addiction, but I think anyone with a conscience knows that putting yourself in the line of temptation is where it all goes wrong.
It's hard to feel sorry for him.
Really good post - the way you've handled it was excellent.
Brian, wonderful image of the kayaks in the mist. Reminds me of this area where I'm living now in the Pacific Northwest. Unfortunately, I'm a scaredy-cat and am little bit afraid of dark water (meaning any water that isn't Caribbean crystal clear so that I can see the boogers on the bottom that might come to eat me)
Your posts always give me pause to think - and that's a good thing because lately, life has really intruded upon me (in unhappy ways). But I'll survive it. Thanks for the story - it's always fun to visit you.
sweet deceit comes calling and negativity lands... and im not just talking about id and testosterone.
hey, you write so well! sharp, vehement, at times even ambiguous, contemplative and curious.
that was great, really great. tiger has clearly been listening to another part of his anatomy. it's a shame. he should love his kids more than he loves vagine.
ps thanks for stopping by my place the other week, now following
This is a beautiful piece. I loved the "life leaking between us". I don't think it pays to be impetuous in the love versus trusted friendship battle. I think it is his loss all round.
Ah . .I'm too cautious to cross too many thresholds but that's one I'd never cross.
Brian,
Your imagery with the trip down in the kayaks was awesome. I was there with you...right on the edge of the kayak...
And you are so so right about these type of decisions. What makes our brains completely ruled by our unwise emotions? It is like common sense is severed. And once you go over the falls, it is not thrilling. It is suicidal. And one can never climb back up a waterfall...
Wow. I peeped in to thank you for your comment on my blog, Brian. And read the above with interest. I used to be so very judgmental and black and white on this issue. I don't mean repeated infidelity - that seems another problem altogether and perhaps relates to sex addiction of some sort. I mean, the first time it happens or falling in love with someone other than one's spouse. My marriage was a 9-year common-law marriage, but it didn't mean we didn't take the commitment we made as seriously. We were able to part amicably because infidelity (as far as I know) did NOT happen between us before I left him. Still, I left because I felt entirely unloved (in every way - physically, emotionally, spiritually). And there were some very vulnerable, desperately lonely moments for me over the course of the final four or five years that I cannot say for sure may have led to something happening had any opportunity occurred. I don't write this in any relation to Mr. Woods. In fact, I don't have a television so reading this was the first I heard of his infidelity. (Probably why I don't have a television. It's a life choice.) At any rate, I think this can be a very gray issue at times. I have watched friends go through this as well and marriages break up over it. And it never seems black and white to me. We are a truly complex species and sometimes the heart knows not what the head is doing and vice versa. There always seems a reason this ends up happening - lack of communication, clearly a lack of respect (to the spouse and to self, I would add), lack of love, lack of understanding. What one lacks, one seeks to fill. We live in a culture so bent on instant gratification, sometimes what we lack is thought, conscience and, as Brian put it wisely, a couple of good friends to point us a different way. Whether that way is right or better depends on so many factors. I had many friends advise me to leave him long before I did. Now I see I should have listened to them, but I hung on hoping that things would change/improve. We saw four counsellors in four years. We tried. Sometimes change has to come and is better for everyone involved. Thanks for inspiring this conversation. Intriguing.
p.s. the opening passages were breathtaking. beautifully written. (this post is also to prove i can be brief if i choose to be! sorry for previous, verbose post!)
Why do people always feel as if there might be something better? How about making what we do have better?
I've looked up to Tiger. And I refuse to believe this. Why can't they just leave him alone? Nice post though Brian.
Too true. All too true. Sadly.
the b ib subtle makes a good point about the instant gratification which has become more the norm in our present day.
I blame the internet...
generally i get my news from the radio (the CBC up here in Canada) and i'm sure this story got attention when it broke, but i'll be the first to admit sometimes it's nice to take a break from media focus and tv reality shows where humiliation is fodder for entertainment. i feel for his wife and child. again, some beautiful writing, Brian. i miss camping and have never kayaked. my friend runs a sea-kayaking business out West. i hope to learn someday. thanks for this post.
Everyone has their own reasons for crossing that threshold. So true that it's almost always a one-way trip. Beautifully written.
I'm not going to judge Tiger because I haven't kept up with the story all that well nor do I know what has gone on in his home/personal life. Regardless, he is a public figure and naturally his affair has become household news... I would surely hate to be one of his family members right now. In nearly half of all marriages, at least that many, there have been partners whom have "crossed the threshold"... for various reasons, yet in many cases the affairs are kept hidden.
This is so heartbreaking. It made me actually ache inside. Two weeks. Can things change that fast? It's like being hit by a bus.
More often than not, following your impulse leads to disaster.
I love the way you write.
Car Goes Boom
You have a gift for description. I was really sad to hear about Tiger. One day he'll look back with regret.
I never take impulsive decisions, on the contrary...I doubt, I think, I doubt, I list the consequences, I regret the losses that any choice inflicts, I wonder what I really want, I wonder if I don't think too much, ...
When I read this post, I am glad for this "gift" :p
So in love w the beginning. . .just wanted to stay there! The ending crushed!
Wow - yeah well, some people just don't think, do they?
Keep posting stuff like this i really like it
Post a Comment