Friday, October 30, 2009

All the pretty maids

On a supermarket bench
in their Sunday best
crinkled eyes gaze
measuring each guest
all the pretty maids
lined in a row.

Times gentle kiss
on their painted lips
steals not desire
nor beauty eclipse
all the pretty maids
lined in a row.

My you are handsome
capturing his glance
drawing on innocence
curiosity en trance
all the pretty maids
lined in a row.

Soft fingers grace
a crease on their hand
pitter patting hearts,
returning hourglass' sand
all the pretty maids
lined in a row.

Notes scribbled on a receipt, as I watch my son with the ladies, waiting for the tram back to the retirement home.

I think they made each other's day.

Have a great weekend and see whose day you can make!

50 comments:

Meeko Fabulous said...

On the back of a receipt?! Wow . . . Kudos to you my friend. That was beautifully written. :)

Oh My Goddess said...

You really are amazing!
xo
Elise

Linda - Nickers and Ink said...

That's adorable.

Ocean Girl said...

I love old people.

(Is that proper to say, your poem says it better and of course more beautifully, thank you).

Not The Rockefellers said...

That was really very sweet

Peace~Rene

secret agent woman said...

Ther eis a beauty in the faces of old women and men that people often overlook.

The Retired One said...

So true, so nice...
When children visited at the Assisted Living facility that I ran...the Residents would ADORE any child in their presence.
They would smile for hours after one visited.

Kulio said...

Alright! You painted that perfectly. Amazing how special it is, when humans who are generations apart connect.

TechnoBabe said...

Awwww, the very young and the very old have a connection the rest of us don't see on the outside.

rxBambi said...

OMG and OG both said it best. That was amazing. How do you come up with this stuff? Hopefully someday someone will see some beauty in my wrinkled old face :)

lakeviewer said...

Love the poem. Adored your last comment, "...see whose day you can make!"

Cinnamon said...

Lovely tribute to age. I have to echo your first commenter- 'on a back of a receipt??!' truly talented, my friend. I am used to your prose, but your poetry is just as eloquent and elegant :)

Daniel said...

Absolutely lovely thought for me to try to live out each day, beginning with tomorrow.

Stacie said...

I love this poem. I love to describe little old ladies when i write. They just make me happy. I had a superb Italian grandma!

tori said...

any comment I can think of seem so trite. love this poem!

Leah said...

This is touching. So vivid and sweet.

Joseph Pulikotil said...

Hi Brian:)

Beautifully crafted poem with amazing clarity and deep insight. You writing this wonderful poem on the back of a receipt reminds me of JK Rowling, famous for her Harry Potter stories. She used to write her stories on paper napkins while sitting in restaurants. I suppose all creative minds keep working overtime.

Have a nice day Brian:)
Joseph

otin said...

Ah Life really comes full circle, the youth and elderly relate to each other so well. Now I know why kids like me! haha! I am not that old yet.

Wings said...

Sweet. :)

smiles4u said...

How sweet! I love elderly people and so do my little people. I love watching them interact with one another.

I love your challange of seeing who's day we can make! Have a great weekend with your family!

Louise said...

That's incredible. I could write for days and not come up with two lines like that. And it's sweet.

♥ Boomer ♥ said...

Beautiful! So beautiful.

Pat said...

you sure have a way with words!

♥ Braja said...

Wonderful...

Green-Eyed Momster said...

I used to love making the pretty maids days. They were my most favorite customers. They are so sweet.
On a receipt, huh?
You are amazing.

Ronda Laveen said...

I can just see how your son enthralled the female contingent. How wonderful for all.

Happy All Hallows Eve! May you recieve a ghost of a story from the other side!

Maggie May said...

Must have been a large receipt. The kind we get are quite tiny.
Beautiful poem that conjured up a lovely scene of a little boy entertaining many elderly ladies!

Nuts in May

lettuce said...

sweet capture of a lovely moment

Mrsupole said...

Some people look, but you see.

And I know what you mean about how you have to write it right away. If not the thoughts will get lost. Subt has to write things as soon as he thinks of them too, and it is amazing what one can come up with.

It would be nice if the pretty maids in a row could see what was written about them. They are blessed to have experienced the love from your sons. You are raising little gentlemen.

Glad you miss my comments. I am slowly getting there. Improvement each day. And look I think this comment makes sense.

God bless.

Protege said...

What a beautiful tribute to the "grey gold"...
Have a great weekend, I have missed your poetic posts.;)

California Girl said...

love it.

happy Halloween Brian!

Bonnie, Original Art Studio said...

Beautiful . . . and poignant Brian.

buffalodick said...

Worked the desk at a rest home while in high school- Sunday the lobby would be busy with little old ladies waiting to be picked up by their families. All dressed up, and excited to once again join the living, if only for an afternoon..

Nessa said...

Your writing has such a sensitive touch all of the time.

Ghost, Goblins, Ghouls, Oh, My

IB said...

Very thoughtfully and delicately written, B.

Brilliant.

IB

snowelf said...

Brian, that was really sweet. Hope you and your family have a fun night tonight! Happy Halloween and thanks for stopping by!

--snow

Candie Bracci said...

That was wonderful Brian!;)
Enjoy your weekend too!Oh can we have pictures of your kids disguised?That'll be cool!Wish they will have a great time!

Valerie said...

Thank you Brian, I enjoyed that.

tony said...

Beauty Across The Years.

kys said...

You are just too good for the rest of us mortals.

AngelMay said...

Awwww, Brian. Loved it.

Betsy said...

Very sweet!

Vodka Mom said...

I have receipts, envelopes, and tons of little notes throughout my purse. They are covered with scribble. Golden, lovely scribble.



xoxox


loved it.

Rose Marie Raccioppi said...

Those spontaneous expressions - heartfelt and lyrical...the gifts of age, the gifts of youth - reflections celebrated!

Pastor Sharon said...

Brian,
This is beautiful!

Joanna Jenkins said...

Having spent a lot of time at a nursing home, I could picture this exactly. Beautifully done, and on the back of a receipt no less. Amazing.

Alix said...

So sweet! I loved that imagery. Sometimes I'm not smart enough to follow all your sentiments - I have to really work at it. But this was instantaneous grace.

blueviolet said...

I've seen some of these pretty maids in a row. I love how you turn such an ordinary event into a beautiful poem.

Joanna Jenkins said...

Back again from Pastor Sharon's. Congratulations on your well-deserved award.

Have a great week!

Ben said...

Very cool poem. I like the moment you captured. It's a very endearing image.