Sunday, July 12, 2009

Thermometer

Both boys were sick today, which made for a pretty lazy day, for them. They lounged around, sucked on chips of ice, napped and watched cartoons, while we waited on them hand and foot. We had an open house at our place, so we ventured to my parent's house, since they were out of town.

The boys have inherited my ability to run a temperature when ill that allows you to fry fish on your forehead. Somewhere around mid-day the battery died on our digital thermometer, so we raided gramma's medicine cabinet, finding her old glass thermometer we grew up using. The boys thought this was pretty cool, so Cole jumped to the head of the line, popping it quickly into his mouth.

I hope that was not gramma's old rectal thermometer. [T]

What does rectal mean mom? [L]

Cole gets a quizzical look on his face.

For your bottom.

In the butt! Why would gramma have a thermometer that goes in your butt?

Cole's look goes from quizzical to terror, to nausea.

Well, sometimes you take babies temperature in their bottoms.

Did you do that to me as a baby?!? (pushing the record button on his mental tape recorder)

Cole's eyes, big as saucers, plead for someone to rescue him.

This was my cue to walk away, fighting the grin spreading across my face. No matter what was said next, it was not going to end pretty.

For the record, it was the regular thermometer, but I am afraid Logan is in the other room calling a lawyer to make sure this is legal.

24 comments:

Daniel said...

As Ronald Reagan used to say, "Trust, but verify".

Brian Miller said...

lol d! one day i am sure i will come of with some redeeming whit and wisdom to pair with this one...it was just too much tonight. smiles.

Ronda Laveen said...

I think Daniel misquoted Regan. Wasn't the quote "Trust, 'butt' verify"? Hope the kids are better soon. It can be draining.

BeautifulWreck said...

LOL!

Kathleen said...

What a delightful tail, er, tale!

Thanks for stopping by my little blog on the prairie...I've been enjoying your comments on other blogs. 'Bout time I checked out your blog. It's wonderful.

We just had an interesting thermometer moment, too. Our old digital one kept saying 99.8 whether you were ablaze with fever or not. Recently, I had what may have been the swine flu and knew I was sick as a dog. Thermometer reading: 99.8. Went to the doctor, and it was 102. So when my husband's temp recently moved the obstreperous thermometer to 101, we knew he was in trouble!

All better now, though.

Mitr - Friend said...

ha ha ha... had a hearty laugh with your kids' expressions...

Btw, how are they feeling now...??? Fever gone..???

Eternally Distracted said...

I'm sure you could publish an hilarious book on the funny things your kids say. Hope they are feeling better.

otin said...

I always used to worry that my mom was going to confuse the thermometers! HA! Imagine that? EWWWW!

Wings said...

Hah! Hope both boys are feeling better today. :)

Steve Ballmer said...

LOL!
Funny stuff guy!

Candie Bracci said...

LOL :D

Pastor Sharon said...

Brian, I am sorry to hear your boys have been ill. That story is quite funny! Did your son get in touch with his lawyer? :) LOL!

Brian Miller said...

@ronda - lol. yeah, we fell asleep pretty early last night in the middle of a movie we rented. guess it did its job.

@beautiful - smiles.

@kathleen - thanks for dropping by and sharing the story. ha. i have always ran notoriously high temperatures. luckily only once a year, but usually results in a doctor or hospital visit.

@mitr - much better today, fever broke in the night. they never had any other symptons other than fever and fatigue, so maybe it was a passing bug.

@eternally - yes, they say some of the darndest things..maybe i should start a tv show, nah already been done. ha.

@otin - growing up with both, i had the same fear. after we grew out of diapers, why did she keep it around? never knew.

@wings - thanks for the warm wishes, much better today.

@steve - life it seems is funnier than anything i can make up. smiles.

@candi - :D

@pastor sharon - much better today and luckily the lawyer was out of the office...and maybe he has forgotten the trauma now. smiles.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Oh that's too funny! Sounds like something we'd taunt the Princess Nagger with...(grin!!!) Hope your little ones are feeling better soon! :)

Lorraine said...

LOL oh gosh, this is marvelous, poor child, oh the horror, and Grandma of all people, thanks for the chuckle, this is a marvelous story and you cheered me up oh and by the way you are a true gentleman and I erased the second post on mine today lol
Hope they get better in no time....

subtorp77 said...

Brian, LMBO! HA! I remember pulling the same prank on my brother!

Ben said...

Haha, that's great :) I remember the feeling of terror when I first was told I would have to take a thermometer in that not so pleasant place.

Valerie said...

HELP! Now you tell me. There was only one thermometer in our house.......
Loved it, loved it, Brian, especially when Logan went off to consult the lawyer.... what a boy!
Are both boys better now?

Brian Miller said...

@stacy - we parents are such goo dtormentors. lol.

@lorraine - sometimes we just have to be honest about where we are at. i appreciate that. glad i gave you a smile.

@subtorp - ha. did you have a younger bother, i take it?

@ben - yep, terrible memories. lol.

@val - ha. they are doing much better. the fever keeps popping back up today so we are not out of the woods yet.

Baino said...

Way to test if they're really ill! Go you good thing. I have a rectal for the horses and left it on the laundry windowsill managing to rescue it from Adam who was convinced he had a temperature and was about to stick it in his mouth! You should have seen his face when I told him where it had been!

Les Becker said...

ROTFL!! "How to Make a Sick Kid Sicker". Love it!

Brian Miller said...

@baino - yeah you made me cringe...can't imagine.

@les - figure its good preventative for faking...smiles.

Mitr - Friend said...

Good to know that they are fine now... Convey my 'hi' to 'em... :)

Goofball said...

whaaahaaa...allow me to find this very amusing to read :p