Botetourt County is about as close to Hazard as it gets, at least it used to be before a higher class of red necks moved in with their Latte's and Wine shops. Winn-Dixie is no longer the only grocery store, and there is not an Esso fillin' station in sight, but in it's day it was a place of front porches and family get togethers on Sunday. It's where I grew up. On Friday nights, boys learned how to be...well, boys.
Engine whining, wheels gripped wet asphalt, propelling us toward manhood, around the next corner. Built up railroad tracks enticed and gave opportunity to play Duke in this Hazard. We had always wondered if it would work. Could we bend the laws of physics and fly, for even a brief moment?
Pinned to the floor, the accellerator begged for mercy, but received little from Charlie. Vibrations, horses straining against their restraint, found their way up through my passenger seat. My cousin cheering us ever faster from the back. Hesitation, ever puckering, as the front wheels raced up the incline, clawing for purchase in empty air...
This is the part in The Dukes of Hazard where the Narrator would cut in with some witty comment like "Those Duke boys were so busy fooling old Roscoe, they did not notice the ladies from the Hazard County Crochet and Knitting Club letting out of their party. Looks like they are about to get all sewed up." Only in this case, he would probably be saying something about the green van coming up the other side of the railroad crossing...
False teeth dropped from gaping jaws, mingling with fast food wrappers littering the black rubber mats of the floorboard. Saucer like eyes met three pair staring down from the streaking silver missile. Orange sparks flared as metal scraped furrows in the road, and tail lights escaped into the night.
We flew. Charlie's car never really ran the same after that. The county evened out the railroad tracks after reports of a "silver UFO looking thang." Charlie sells debt consolidations. Mike writes songs. Me, I just try to keep my boys entertained with better things to do on Fridays, and give a little more sense than I had.
Have a great weekend ya'll!