Saturday, April 4, 2009

Hide and Seek

This afternoon I picked Logan up from school and took him out on town for some man time. We hit the toy aisle at Target to check out the super heroes, then rolled over to Burger King for dinner. Chicken nuggets and french fries, Logan's favorite fuel for his gas tank. They also have a pretty amazing play place that has three or four layers of tunnels, rooms and two twisty slides.

Rule #3 Children must be supervised by a happy adult at all times

So, what makes this adult happy? Playing on the Play Place of course, which I felt over rode Rule #2 - Only children 3-12 can play on the equipment.

One of our favorite things to do at the Play Place is Hide and Seek. We will take turns going into the maze while the other counts. The fun really begins when you are found and it becomes a mad rush to stay ahead of the hunter through the twists and turns. Pretty soon we had three other kids coming up asking to play with us. Lots of fun, but I will probably have bruises on my knees for days. When we were done and walking out to the car, our new friends were pressed against the glass waving goodbye.

As we were driving home, Logan shared that he was nervous about the school play coming up in May. When I asked him what made him nervous, it was "You adults will be there. I'll be in front of new people." 

"Hey, I get nervous's what you do with it. Think about the kids we just played with. We did not know them before they asked to play with us. The key, have fun, be yourself, and let them come to you."

Why is it we get so concerned about other people liking us?


Mrsupole said...

Rejection is a very hard thing to deal with. Being the last person picked to be on a team. Sitting alone eating lunch while all the other kids are laughing and talking. No one wanting to stand with you in line or sit with you by your desk. Whether you are a child or an adult rejection is a hard thing to deal with, it has even driven some to do crazy things. But I got this funny little feeling in my brain that things will be just right.

God bless.

VK said...


"In other news today, paramedics were called to the McDonald's on 12th street after a man apparently broke his hip evading tag. The jaws of life were used to remove him from the circle slide."

Nice post. :)

Leah said...

That sounds supremely fun.

As for your question, I don't have good insight into why I like people to like me. It seems to come from some primal place, a need for approval. But as I've gotten older, I find I care less, as long as the right people like me!

I like what you said to your son.

Brian Miller said... yeah sometimes it feels like they may need to remove me. they make them so small you would think they were made for children.

@leah...yeah it does seem to get easier as you get older. like @mrsu said, there are a lot of pressure points as a kid as you are figuring it out....lunch room, can be unmerciful at times.

Auntie, aka cagny said...

your son is lucky to have a father who gives him "man time".
my boyfriend and I are raising his 3 1/2 year old grandson...the biological father lives about 4 miles across town but never cares to see the boy.
how tragic.
keep up the great work.
the world will be a better place because of REAL DADS like you.

reyjr said...

you're a great dad, I can tell. :D

Cinnamon said...

I think Leah and Mrsu are right- that need for approval is somehow ingrained. It is very scary for children to perform in front of adults- but do you know what I think is great? That Logan was able to tell you how he feels :)

subtorp77 said...

Many a time I find myself in the midst of strangers (usually waiting in a queue, somewhere ). All of a sudden they'll just open up on some topic or other; never mind who's listening. I had a similar reaction when I did my first play, at 8 years of age! Logan is wise to front this.

Megan said...

You're a good dad.

Daniel said...

We are concerned about people liking us because it makes us feel important and special. Without this, the world is gray, threatening, and lifeless.

Brian Miller said...

@cinnamon...could not agree more.

@auntie...thanks! for the good comments and for investing in your grandsons life. it;s great that your boyfriend is helping as i see too many boys struggle for lack of a dad or male figure in their life.

Kelsey said...

I still struggle with wanting people to like me sometimes. Who knows why we do it? It is truly a strange thing.


Gabby said...

Who doesn't struggle with approval, even as an adult? It's a struggle in the work place, in your own family, sometimes even with your friends. I sure do but it does become a little easier as we grow older, though. It's confidence and full acceptance of yourself that little things like "do they like me?" become frivolous and a waste of energy.