Saturday, February 21, 2009

Help

There are times when we all need help. Sure we try to hide it, as if we have to prove we have what it takes or that we are man enough to handle all that life throws at us. Ultimately that burden becomes too much and we collapse under the weight. We can feel like a fool asking for help, but isn't it more foolish to try to do it ourselves?

Over the last several months, I have been working with a guy on a project. Actually a small part of a much larger project. He was putting together some specs and a bid, but on the day they were due gave me a call. It seems life had caught up with him. He had been trying to out run it. Work harder and hope that they went away. The issues dealt with his family, but it was starting to affect his work and he acknowledged that.

After hearing his story, not knowing what else to do, I prayed with him. I would love to say, this is always my initial response, but many times when you are faced with someone else's adversity, it is much easier to say you will or realising there is nothing you can do, let the opportunity pass you by.

Two days later he called me back. You could hear a change in his voice. Did it turn out the way he had hope. Not exactly, but he was at peace with the outcome. He was looking at the challenge in a new way, and at what responsibility he had in the situation. Instead of fighting, he said he needed to seek forgiveness.

While he was appreciative of the time I took with him and the prayers, I must say, I got as much as I gave just listening to how his perspective had changed and how he was going to approach it going forward. In giving the help, I found the help I needed.

What keeps you from asking for help? or giving help?

3 comments:

Daniel said...

Sometimes I am so overcome with a situation that I don't know what to ask for, I don't see a solution, I can't even form a clear picture of the problem in my own mind. If I can't wrap my mind around something, it is very hard to look to others for help. Sometimes I am too emotional or hurt or embarrassed to as for help, I kind of what to bury my problem so that others won't see how screwed up I really am. The other side of your question, I often don't help others because I am totally selfish. Something I am working on, but only with limited progress. Blessings to you.

tony said...

Maybe we dont always look for signs? If I am asked verbally thats one thing.but usually people needing the help of others are not so direct (for many reasons).......we need to look for all the non-verbal cues.The temptation (for me !) is i might pretend not to "read" them......

Brian Miller said...

I hear both of you...it is very easy to look at a situation and think, what can I do. We limit ourselves as many times someone just needs a listening ear. I miss more shots than I take.