Thursday, November 6, 2008


Well, not quite...but my boys live pretty close. At four and six years old, they would rather run around the house in their underwear. At best, they may accessorize with a pillowcase as a cape. This is one reason you should call before you drop by.

As an adult sitting around the house in my underwear, just feels vulnerable. Maybe a little weird. I would not want anyone to see me, and honestly sometimes, I don't even want to see myself. Sometimes, I struggle with those same reservations when it comes to my openness with others.

Being human, I want others to like me, I want to be accepted. This can be dangerous, like most things, when taken to extreme. Our relationships become work as we try to keep up the personas we have created, all the while dying a slow, lonely relational death.

Opening up can be just as painful, because we are not selling the Ferrari, maybe more like a Yugo. People then have to make a decision, not on what they see on the outside, but what is on the inside. We have to trust them.

Either way, relationships don't just happen, they require effort. Trust does not just materialize, without someone taking the first step. The more open you are, the more deep and meaningful the relationships you will have. There is freedom found in being relationally naked.

Although, I might hang on to the pillowcase. For aerodynamics, of course.

What keeps us from getting there? What keep us from accepting others unconditionally?


Daniel said...

Part of being naked relationally, at least for me, is that I don't want to share who I am because there are parts of me that either I do not like or do not want to face. Rather than dealing with these kinds of heavy issues, I keep many of my relationships on a very shallow level. This can be fine with me most of the time, but who do you turn to when things go sour and you need an ear, a shoulder, or a hug?

Brian Miller said...

Great question Daniel, and thus the conundrum of the not so naked life. Fig leaf anyone?